Complete Labor Law Poster for $24.95
from www.LaborLawCenter.com, includes
State, Federal, & OSHA posting requirements

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

my mom's trying to take daughter Wisconsin

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • my mom's trying to take daughter Wisconsin

    Please help me. I have an eight year old daughter whose paternity was never established. The man she knows as her father has been in her life, except for maybe a year or so, from birth. He is the only one she knows as her father. Recently, he, his wife and I decided that we would allow her to spend more time at their house(spending a week or two at a time there and being here the rest of the time) so that they can spend more time together since he barely gets to see her. My daughter is completely for the idea, and his family is too. however, my mother and brother do not want her to go over there at all. I'm not even sure of the reason why anymore, because every time it comes up, I'm given a different excuse. My mother claims that I'm sending my child there because I want to get rid of her and start a new life with my son's father, whom I have been broken up with for four years. She is claiming that I'm "throwing" my child away and said that if I don't want her, to give her to my brother or herself. She has even gone as far as saying that if she finds out that my daughter has been over there with him that she will take me to court to take my daughter. She has been questioning my daughter about where she goes and if she has been over there. I am afraid that if she did this and claims neglect(which is what she seems to be doing) that I will lose both of my children. Is there anything I can do to stop her from doing this to my family?

  • #2
    First off, letting your child stay with friends, which is what they are, is not a crime, if you are making sure she gets to school etc. It is not child neglect unless you leave her for a very long period of time. This is my opinion. You can ban the mom and your brother from seeing her, but that may cause resentment from you daughter, if they are close, but you can let them know, if they continue to threaten to take your child away, that they have no legal right to force you to let them see her in the first place. Now, lets be honest here, from someone looking from the outside, in, you are allowing your child to spend to much time with them, I would suggest every weekend, so it does not make going to school difficult. There would be absolutely nothing wrong with that. No judge would think that that is child abandonement or child neglect. Letting your child stay there for say, 3 weeks during the summer vacation, or during spring break, would not look bad either. It is nice for a family to take her in like that. What I am saying is, that a judge may deem it harmful to her, if you are letting her be gone so long during the school week, and that could be used against you in court. As far as them seeing her, IT IS NOT AGAINST THE LAW, AND THIER WORDS ARE EMPTY ON THAT THREAT, other than what they could make the judge see as poor judgement on your part, that I mentioned allready. I stayed every weekend, and lots and lots of time during the summer, with my best friends mom and dad, and her, it was good for all of us. During the school year, was totally different. It would be hard to monitor her school progress, attendance, problems, with her gone during the school year. I hope you make the right decision, and do not give the g-ma or uncle ammunition, that may be used against you!
    Last edited by turbowray; 02-22-2007, 12:43 AM.

    Comment


    • #3
      We made arrangments for her to get to and from school during the time she would be over there. She gets a bus to school that picks her up from daycare so that wouldn't cause any problems; they(the daycare) would just pick her up from their house instead of mine. And I don't see how the amt. of time spent there could show poor judgement on my part. She would still be with me the majority of the time. This man wants to be her father and my daughter needs a father figure so how is that poor judgement? And as far as the weekends, he works almost every single weekend which is why we made these arrangements in the first place. And I could refuse to let my mom and brother see her, but my mother would just go to her schoool or daycare, and I have to have a restraining order to prevent her from having contact.

      Comment


      • #4
        Assuming that this man is in fact the biological father, then first thing you should do is establish paternity, therefore making him the legal father. Then work out a LEGAL visitation and child support schedule through the courts. If you and he agree to 50/50 custody, then it's likely that NEITHER of you will have to pay the other child support.

        It does not sound like your mother has a leg to stand on, but she certainly will not be able to do anything if you are sharing custody with the child's legal father.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by MomofBoys View Post
          Assuming that this man is in fact the biological father, then first thing you should do is establish paternity, therefore making him the legal father. Then work out a LEGAL visitation and child support schedule through the courts. If you and he agree to 50/50 custody, then it's likely that NEITHER of you will have to pay the other child support.

          It does not sound like your mother has a leg to stand on, but she certainly will not be able to do anything if you are sharing custody with the child's legal father.
          he is not her biological father. He wants to be her father, but cannot be named as such because we are not married. that is where the problem is, because legally, my mother has rights whereas he does not.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by concernedsinglemom View Post
            he is not her biological father. He wants to be her father, but cannot be named as such because we are not married. that is where the problem is, because legally, my mother has rights whereas he does not.
            Your mother does not have rights to your child. Currently, the only person with rights to your child is YOU.

            Knowing that he is not and cannot be her legal father, it may not be the best idea to allow her to spend weeks at a time with this man. Were you ever married to him? In some cases, a step-parent, with permission of the parents, can receive visitation of a step-child in the event of a divorce.

            The only way your mother could take custody is if she could prove you unfit. And the only way she could enforce Grandparents rights is if she PETITIONS for them, then PROVES in court that it is in the child's best interest that she receive visitation. Since you are not impeding her relationship with her grandchild, she has no leg to stand on. Grandparents are not automatically given rights to their Grandchildren, and you are under no obligation to allow her to be with that child.

            Assuming that this man is a good man who loves your daughter and they have developed a bond, the fact that your mom is trying to end the relationship between him and your child will look bad for your mother.

            Comment

            The LaborLawTalk.com forum is intended for informational use only and should not be relied upon and is not a substitute for legal advice. The information contained on LaborLawTalk.com are opinions and suggestions of members and is not a representation of the opinions of LaborLawTalk.com. LaborLawTalk.com does not warrant or vouch for the accuracy, completeness or usefulness of any postings or the qualifications of any person responding. Please consult a legal expert or seek the services of an attorney in your area for more accuracy on your specific situation.
            Working...
            X