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my rights

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  • my rights

    Ok. First of all I left my ex in '01 after living for five years in an abusive relationship. The divorce defaulted and was finalized in '02.

    It states that: 'It is in the best intrest of the minor children that visitation be determined upon defendent's(ex) application to the court or as aggreed-upon by both parties'

    Anyways, for the first two years after I left my ex I would email him with an address change, a phone number change or watnot, and beg him to try to be a part of the children's lives. He would respond with insults (I told you to get an abortion, I won't pay child support, ect.) and refuse to have anything to do with the kids.

    Then there was silence. Didn't hear from him. Washed my hands of him and kept on taking care of kids, working, trying to be both mom and dad. My oldest was diagnosed with autism (high functioning) and I went through all of it alone.

    The kids don't remember the ex (they were very young when I left) and I have not talked about him to them. I didn't want them to form opinions based on me griping. I wanted them to come up with their own opinions of their biological father. Well, they have no opinion, they don't know who he is, he never contacted them never fostered a relationship with them.

    I feel that since there has been no attempt on his part to be a father (he never applied for visitation) I am not required to keep him informed of our whereabouts (address/phone # & so on) there's no court order stating I have too.

    Is there some law that I have to keep him informed? He refused to give me an address (didn't want to get arrested for non payment of child support) the last time I asked for it .
    Last edited by lovebeingamom; 10-27-2006, 04:13 PM.

  • #2
    This may be different from state to state. Most states DO NOT require the other person to know your address. You may be required to inform agencies that collect child support and you would need to keep up any court ordered visitations.

    If you are moving out of state, you would need to have the courts allow that change IF you had visitation that would be affected by it.

    Since you state that he never got visitation, then I see no requirements for it, but you should check with a local attorney to see if something is required in your state.
    Last edited by demartian; 10-27-2006, 06:38 PM.


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