Money question for the group

[Brian]

On Mon, 09 Feb 2004 07:28:43 -0500, Cari{P} <Cari{P}> wrote:

JWB wrote:

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted? Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together). another question - what the hell happened to CJ?

This is so funny that you as this. DH asked me the exact same questionthe other night while we were snuggling.Yes, I would stay with my husband. My life with him is the life that Ireally want.-Cari

I'd be gone before receiving the first check. I mean I wish I could
say I'd stay like the rest of you, but things haven't turned out as
well for me.

--Brian

[Brian]

Money question for the group

On 9 Feb 2004 10:56:49 -0800, [email protected] (Caren) wrote:

Brian <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>. ..

On Mon, 09 Feb 2004 07:28:43 -0500, Cari{P} <Cari{P}> wrote:

JWB wrote:> If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going> to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the> money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really> wanted?>> Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say> most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for> absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).>> another question - what the hell happened to CJ?This is so funny that you as this. DH asked me the exact same questionthe other night while we were snuggling.Yes, I would stay with my husband. My life with him is the life that Ireally want.-Cari

I'd be gone before receiving the first check. I mean I wish I could say I'd stay like the rest of you, but things haven't turned out as well for me. --Brian

Brian, my life is far from perfect and from what many posters write inhere, far from the relationships that I hear about. I think aboutleaving from time to time, but the bottom line is, you take yourselfwith you. I know that you think that most of the crap in yourmarriage is her, but you finally wake up one day and realize what youneed to own. I blamed my first husband for everything until wedivorced and I went for counseling. I realized how I messed up and Ifessed up to him. I apologized for making him feel like he wasflawed...we both were. I then got into a series of relationships andthey were all wrong.Now I'm in a marriage, with its flaws, with a husband who has flaws.And yes, I still have mine. If you could hang in there and work onyourself (not just physically, as I recall you joined a gym orsomething). The inside is what needs work.I am not at your house to witness your life Brian, but at the veryleast, from reading your posts, you have a short fuse. It's hard tolive with someone with a short fuse-you never know what will make themgo off. I'm sure you have other flaws as well (as do all of us), buttry and focus on you, not her.

Thanks for the post. I've never once said I'm not responsible for at
least some of our problems. I've tried. I've messed up. I've gone to
counseling. I've been supportive. There comes a time when you have to
think, I'm just getting older and this is not working. I don't want to
be here 5 years from now posting the same ****.

--Brian

[Brian]

Money question for the group

On 9 Feb 2004 19:10:11 GMT, Ignoramus20725
<[email protected]> wrote:

In article <[email protected]>, Brian wrote:

On 9 Feb 2004 10:56:49 -0800, [email protected] (Caren) wrote:

Brian <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>. ..> On Mon, 09 Feb 2004 07:28:43 -0500, Cari{P} <Cari{P}> wrote:>> >JWB wrote:> >> If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going> >> to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the> >> money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really> >> wanted?> >>> >> Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say> >> most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for> >> absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).> >>> >> another question - what the hell happened to CJ?> >> >This is so funny that you as this. DH asked me the exact same question> >the other night while we were snuggling.> >> >Yes, I would stay with my husband. My life with him is the life that I> >really want.> >> >-Cari>> I'd be gone before receiving the first check. I mean I wish I could> say I'd stay like the rest of you, but things haven't turned out as> well for me.>Brian, my life is far from perfect and from what many posters write inhere, far from the relationships that I hear about. I think aboutleaving from time to time, but the bottom line is, you take yourselfwith you. I know that you think that most of the crap in yourmarriage is her, but you finally wake up one day and realize what youneed to own. I blamed my first husband for everything until wedivorced and I went for counseling. I realized how I messed up and Ifessed up to him. I apologized for making him feel like he wasflawed...we both were. I then got into a series of relationships andthey were all wrong.Now I'm in a marriage, with its flaws, with a husband who has flaws.And yes, I still have mine. If you could hang in there and work onyourself (not just physically, as I recall you joined a gym orsomething). The inside is what needs work.I am not at your house to witness your life Brian, but at the veryleast, from reading your posts, you have a short fuse. It's hard tolive with someone with a short fuse-you never know what will make themgo off. I'm sure you have other flaws as well (as do all of us), buttry and focus on you, not her.

Thanks for the post. I've never once said I'm not responsible for at least some of our problems. I've tried. I've messed up. I've gone to counseling. I've been supportive. There comes a time when you have to think, I'm just getting older and this is not working. I don't want to be here 5 years from now posting the same ****.

you know Brian, who guarantees that 5 years from now you won't be evenmore disappointed?i

In my current relationship or in another one?

--Brian

[Brian]

Money question for the group

On Mon, 09 Feb 2004 22:29:49 GMT, "kitty" <[email protected]> wrote:

I'd quit work... I would stay with my hubby through richer or poorer. ...I'd hire a teacher, travel the world with the kids (giving them a historylesson were the history actually took place)... invest it so we could playwell into old age.."JWB" <[email protected]> wrote in messagenews:[email protected] ..

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split

the

money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted? Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I

say

most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together). another question - what the hell happened to CJ? -- JWB e-mail: jwb3333 at excite dot com

Funny how not a single person said they would hire an accountant.
Everyone thinks they could handle that amount of money when in
reality, they can't. I read once where most people who win more then
5 million are bankrupt within 10 years. I'd get an accountant first.

--Brian

[JWB]

Money question for the group


If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going
to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the
money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really
wanted?

Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say
most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for
absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).

another question - what the hell happened to CJ?
--
JWB

e-mail: jwb3333 at excite dot com

[Michael]

Money question for the group

in article [email protected], JWB at
[email protected] wrote on 2/8/04 10:40 AM:

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted? Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together). another question - what the hell happened to CJ?

Stay together. We have a generally good thing. $20 million would simply
allow us to pick it up and move it somewhere warmer.

M.

[Tracey]

Money question for the group

>If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money

were never going to be issues again, would you stay withyour spouse? Or would you split the money and then go yourseparate ways so you could have the life you really wanted?

My decision, JWB, would be to stay together. Funny, we just
were talking about this thing Friday night. Our first pur-
chase would be a bike made by OCC with a Celtic theme. LOL

Tracey

[Bill in Co.]

Money question for the group

Michael wrote:

in article [email protected], JWB at [email protected] wrote on 2/8/04 10:40 AM:

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted?

For people in good marriages, why would they want to split the money and go
their separate ways? (I must have missed something here).

[WhansaMi]

Money question for the group

>If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going

to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split themoney and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you reallywanted?Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I saymost likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say forabsolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).

We'd stay together.

Sheila

another question - what the hell happened to CJ?--JWB

[Michael]

Money question for the group

in article [email protected] .net, Bill in
Co. at [email protected] wrote on 2/8/04 1:12 PM:

Michael wrote:

in article [email protected], JWB at [email protected] wrote on 2/8/04 10:40 AM:

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted?

For people in good marriages, why would they want to split the money and go their separate ways? (I must have missed something here).

It's actually a very interesting question. I assume many people have dreams
that no amount of "planning" will get them any closer to attaining. One of
mine would be to do a complete circuit of the North, Central and South
America, with no time limits imposed something that might take years. And
then hop a plane and do it somewhere else. That'd be kind of difficult to
reconcile with a partner who wanted to go to Costa Rica for three weeks, and
then come home to bigger house.


That doesn't mean the marriage isn't good under a more realistic framework.

M.

[DrLith]

Money question for the group

"JWB" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split

the

money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you really wanted? Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I

say

most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).

I'm not sure I understand the question (or more properly, the motivation
behind the question). If I were in a good marriage, I don't see why winning
a ton-o-bucks would make any difference in my desire to stay together. If I
were in a marriage so bad that I wanted to get out, I don't see why winning
a ton-o-bucks would make me more receptive to leaving.

Maybe you're saying that, as a man, if you were in a lousy marriage, maybe
you'd feel less guilty about leaving if you felt your wife would be "taken
care of" (with little negative impact on your own financial situation)? Or
that if you're a woman, you'd feel better about leaving likewise knowing
you'd be "taken care of" and wouldn't have to struggle? I don't understand
this "take care of" business anyhow (I know, my words, not yours, but it's
the only logic by which the question makes any sense to me). It's so far
from my reality.

[JWB]

Money question for the group

"DrLith" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]132000.news.uni-berlin.de...

"JWB" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never

going

to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse? Or would you split the

money and then go your separate ways so you could have the life you

really

wanted? Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I say

most likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say for absolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).

I'm not sure I understand the question (or more properly, the motivation behind the question). If I were in a good marriage, I don't see why

winning

a ton-o-bucks would make any difference in my desire to stay together. If

I

were in a marriage so bad that I wanted to get out, I don't see why

winning

a ton-o-bucks would make me more receptive to leaving. Maybe you're saying that, as a man, if you were in a lousy marriage, maybe you'd feel less guilty about leaving if you felt your wife would be "taken care of" (with little negative impact on your own financial situation)? Or that if you're a woman, you'd feel better about leaving likewise knowing you'd be "taken care of" and wouldn't have to struggle? I don't understand this "take care of" business anyhow (I know, my words, not yours, but it's the only logic by which the question makes any sense to me). It's so far from my reality.

I ask because I feel many people stay together simply because it is very
difficult financially to leave. This doesn't mean they are unhappy on a
regular basis, but if finances were completely taken out of the equation,
they might look at their partner in a different light.

I just think a lot of people, while they may be tolerant of their marriage
or life, would secretly rather be somewhere else doing something (and
someone different than they are now.

I guess maybe a better question is: Is the life you are now living the life
you *want* to live?

[Caren]

Money question for the group

Tracey <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and moneywere never going to be issues again, would you stay withyour spouse? Or would you split the money and then go yourseparate ways so you could have the life you really wanted? My decision, JWB, would be to stay together. Funny, we just were talking about this thing Friday night. Our first pur- chase would be a bike made by OCC with a Celtic theme. LOL Tracey

Honestly, I think we'd stay together. It feels good to be able to say
this! We would however have opportunities that we don't have now,
such as being able to go on trips and perhaps buy a house where it's
sunny and has the sound of waves. The real thing. However, that
might lead us to spending less time together. Which could result in
appreciating each other more. Or maybe I'd feel compelled to purchase
mushy cards and write on them at the beach and mail to him :-)

We talk about winning money and it's too unreal to even imagine. we
have major money issues. I couldn't imagine not having them.

And I don't know where CJ is. Maybe Michael Jackson is marrying his
sister and he is photographing the wedding. Tatooed boobs and all.

[Phil]

Money question for the group

JWB ...

Hey, let's look at this from a guy's perspective. Who happens to be
happily married ...

Or would you split the money and then go your separate ways so youcould have the life you really wanted?

If your marriage is good the $20 million would be "icing on the cake"
IMHO, don't you think? What good is it if you have $10 million in
the bank to live the single life without your spouce of whom you love
and cherish?

Since I asked, I should answer too - I would most likely stay married (I saymost likely only because since I haven't lived it, it's hard to say forabsolute certain, but I'm 99% sure we'd stick together).

Barring anything short of your spouse "totally squirreling out",
anyone IMHO, would be very foolish to divorce your spouce.

Just my .02 cents worth ...


_
Phil

__________________________
Life is short, enjoy a cigar!
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[Tai]

Money question for the group

JWB wrote:

If you won 20 million dollars tomorrow, so work and money were never going to be issues again, would you stay with your spouse?

Oh yes! We'd love to be able to spend more time with each other, that's what
we miss. I think my husband would like to run a specialist bookstore and
sell mainly by internet but also open on days/evening convenient to him. It
wouldn't matter if it ran at a (small) loss because it would be a vehicle
for enjoying his wargaming hobby - increasing his network of gamers etc.

We'd travel far more and take our kids to places we've been and places we'd
like to go.

another question - what the hell happened to CJ?

I don't now. I hope he's well and enjoying life.

Tai