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  • #76
    To Divorce or Not

    "longshot" <[email protected]> wrote in message
    news:[email protected]
    your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does a person work? for the money.
    If I worked solely for the money, I would have chosen a higher-paying
    profession. But I work for pleasure too. If I had millions, I'd still do the
    same work I'm doing now.


    Comment


    • #77
      To Divorce or Not

      "longshot" <[email protected]> wrote in message
      news:[email protected]
      your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does a person work? for the money.
      If I worked solely for the money, I would have chosen a higher-paying
      profession. But I work for pleasure too. If I had millions, I'd still do the
      same work I'm doing now.


      Comment


      • #78
        To Divorce or Not




        "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
        message news:[email protected]
        'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
        on a related note, people that smoke cigarettes are more likely to use
        heroine, become hookers, rob banks... ect..
        that's why you shouldn't smoke.


        translation: a people that tend to live on the edge & take chances might be
        the kind that takes chances.


        Comment


        • #79
          To Divorce or Not




          "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
          message news:[email protected]
          'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
          on a related note, people that smoke cigarettes are more likely to use
          heroine, become hookers, rob banks... ect..
          that's why you shouldn't smoke.


          translation: a people that tend to live on the edge & take chances might be
          the kind that takes chances.


          Comment


          • #80
            To Divorce or Not

            "longshot" <[email protected]> wrote in message
            news:[email protected]
            If I worked solely for the money, I would have chosen a higher-paying profession. But I work for pleasure too. If I had millions, I'd still do
            the
            same work I'm doing now.
            are you a hooker or a drug dealer?
            No. But I do work for myself. For lack of a better catch-all title, let's
            say I'm a freelance business / computer consultant.


            Comment


            • #81
              To Divorce or Not

              "longshot" <[email protected]> wrote in message
              news:[email protected]
              If I worked solely for the money, I would have chosen a higher-paying profession. But I work for pleasure too. If I had millions, I'd still do
              the
              same work I'm doing now.
              are you a hooker or a drug dealer?
              No. But I do work for myself. For lack of a better catch-all title, let's
              say I'm a freelance business / computer consultant.


              Comment


              • #82
                To Divorce or Not

                "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
                message news:[email protected]
                One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                Oh wait... webtv... ok, I understand your logic now.


                Comment


                • #83
                  To Divorce or Not

                  "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
                  message news:[email protected]
                  One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                  Oh wait... webtv... ok, I understand your logic now.


                  Comment


                  • #84
                    To Divorce or Not

                    [email protected] (Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius) writes:
                    'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                    As I said, no one has shown that living together has any causative
                    effect.

                    While you are looking at things correlated with divorce:

                    In the US

                    -"red" states have higher divorce rates than "blue" states.
                    - christians have higher divorce rates than atheists and agnostics.
                    - amongst christians the highest divorce rates are among Baptists,
                    "born again," and fundamentalist christians.

                    Are we to interpret voting for Bush as increasing your chances of
                    divorce?

                    Are we to interpret "accepting Christ as your _personal_ savior" as
                    increasing your chances of divorce?

                    Comment


                    • #85
                      To Divorce or Not

                      [email protected] (Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius) writes:
                      'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                      As I said, no one has shown that living together has any causative
                      effect.

                      While you are looking at things correlated with divorce:

                      In the US

                      -"red" states have higher divorce rates than "blue" states.
                      - christians have higher divorce rates than atheists and agnostics.
                      - amongst christians the highest divorce rates are among Baptists,
                      "born again," and fundamentalist christians.

                      Are we to interpret voting for Bush as increasing your chances of
                      divorce?

                      Are we to interpret "accepting Christ as your _personal_ savior" as
                      increasing your chances of divorce?

                      Comment


                      • #86
                        To Divorce or Not


                        "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
                        message news:[email protected]
                        'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                        What you are missing is that the kind of people who would cohabit may also
                        be the kind of people who are more likely to divorce. It isn't that
                        cohabiting causes divorce, it is that cohabiting and divorce often attract
                        the same type of personality.

                        Which is what Doug meant when he said "they don't show that living together
                        has any causative effect".


                        Comment


                        • #87
                          To Divorce or Not


                          "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in
                          message news:[email protected]
                          'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                          What you are missing is that the kind of people who would cohabit may also
                          be the kind of people who are more likely to divorce. It isn't that
                          cohabiting causes divorce, it is that cohabiting and divorce often attract
                          the same type of personality.

                          Which is what Doug meant when he said "they don't show that living together
                          has any causative effect".


                          Comment


                          • #88
                            To Divorce or Not

                            "Joy" <[email protected]> writes:
                            "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
                            'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                            What you are missing is that the kind of people who would cohabit may also be the kind of people who are more likely to divorce. It isn't that cohabiting causes divorce, it is that cohabiting and divorce often attract the same type of personality. Which is what Doug meant when he said "they don't show that living together has any causative effect".
                            Yes, OR (and I think this might be more likely):

                            I think there are certain people who after living together for a
                            long time, think they _should_ get married, and then get married
                            from that sense.

                            So it isn't living together that is the problem, the problem is the
                            idea in some people's heads that living together _ought_ to lead to
                            marriage.

                            Doug

                            Comment


                            • #89
                              To Divorce or Not

                              "Joy" <[email protected]> writes:
                              "Supercalifragil Isticexpialidocius" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]
                              'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).' Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for those who lived together first. But they don't show that living together has any causative effect. Reply : Higher divorce rates have been linked to Shacking Up beforehand ; plus...there are many disadvantages/repercussions to cohabitating --- One only need watch Judge Judy on TV to see that .
                              What you are missing is that the kind of people who would cohabit may also be the kind of people who are more likely to divorce. It isn't that cohabiting causes divorce, it is that cohabiting and divorce often attract the same type of personality. Which is what Doug meant when he said "they don't show that living together has any causative effect".
                              Yes, OR (and I think this might be more likely):

                              I think there are certain people who after living together for a
                              long time, think they _should_ get married, and then get married
                              from that sense.

                              So it isn't living together that is the problem, the problem is the
                              idea in some people's heads that living together _ought_ to lead to
                              marriage.

                              Doug

                              Comment


                              • #90
                                To Divorce or Not


                                "Doug Anderson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
                                news:[email protected]
                                I think there are certain people who after living together for a long time, think they _should_ get married, and then get married from that sense. So it isn't living together that is the problem, the problem is the idea in some people's heads that living together _ought_ to lead to marriage.
                                I posted recently on That Other Newsgroup about a study looking at the
                                effect of (among other things) length of courtship on marital success.
                                Couples that dated for about 2 years were the most successful, but couples
                                who dated less than 18 months had more successful marriages than couples who
                                dated for 3 years or more. So one theory (possibly in complement with other
                                factors) I would propose is that living together (like dating for a long
                                time) maybe creates such a sense of familiarity and routine that you
                                overlook the "red flags" that may have bothered you earlier in the
                                relationship. Rather than making the bad stuff more obvious, maybe the
                                constant exposure of living together dampens our sensitivity to those
                                problems?


                                Comment

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