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Trying to help out a loving boyfriend

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  • Trying to help out a loving boyfriend

    My boyfriend and I are both under the age of 18. And well appearently his ex was pregnate and she gave birth last Thursday but DID NOT even call to let him know. He had to call to the hospital to ask since they hadnt talked in a few days. As his fiance i found this to be very unsettling. She refuses to let him see him, wont talk to him, and quite frankly is hiding behind her mother. In the state of Illinois does he have any parental rights if she refuses to comply with the paternaty test? ( There is a question on whether the boy is even his.)
    Thanx in advance.

  • #2
    Originally posted by cololily
    My boyfriend and I are both under the age of 18. And well appearently his ex was pregnate and she gave birth last Thursday but DID NOT even call to let him know. He had to call to the hospital to ask since they hadnt talked in a few days. As his fiance i found this to be very unsettling. She refuses to let him see him, wont talk to him, and quite frankly is hiding behind her mother. In the state of Illinois does he have any parental rights if she refuses to comply with the paternaty test? ( There is a question on whether the boy is even his.)
    Thanx in advance.
    He has no rights at all until he files with the court to establish paternity and visitation rights. He needs to file ASAP, because she can legally keep him away and she will most likely file for CS.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by cololily
      As his fiance i found this to be very unsettling.
      You need to focus on YOUR OWN pregnancy and let boyfriend handle this. Two girlfriends pregnant at the same time? He was a busy boy.

      Xena's right, until paternity is established he has no rights at all.

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      • #4
        So you his girlfriend now is pregnant? If i was you I would let things go untill there is paternity established. There is nothing your boyfriend can do untill he is proven to be the father. I went through this same sistuation where my boyfriend had a one night stand and a result in pregnancy and I was pregnant at the time and let me tell you that stress on your shoulders can hurt your baby if you are not carefull. I hope you boyfriend learned a lesson to keep his thing in his pants!!!! It has been 3 years since this accident happened to our family and it does take time to get over and he has grown up a lot so I hope your boyfriend can do the same. Wish you luck

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        • #5
          Originally posted by mom26
          So you his girlfriend now is pregnant?
          Sorry, I was talking to Lily and forgot that other people are reading this too.

          http://www.laborlawtalk.com/showthread.php?t=82245

          Lily, you have enough to deal with yourself without any added problems/drama. Boyfriend needs to take care of this himself and not stress you out any more. You need to take care of YOU and YOUR BABY.

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          • #6
            Question for you why at 16 years old would you want to have a baby knowing your boyfriend already had a baby on the way? You are way too young to be wanting babies!!!!!!! You need to take care of yourself before anything.

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            • #7
              Thanx guys.

              Originally posted by mom26
              Question for you why at 16 years old would you want to have a baby knowing your boyfriend already had a baby on the way? You are way too young to be wanting babies!!!!!!! You need to take care of yourself before anything.
              Although what you all are saying Does sound reasonable. I guesss it's just the fact that he and I are getting married on Sept. 17th. Both of our parents agreed to it. So honestly I personally think we are both being VERY mature about what is going on. His ex gave permission to the paternaty test and we are suppose to have the results in a few days. But their relationship was over a couple months before he and I got together and she was 8 monthes pregnate when he and I found out about our own pregnancy. But this pregnancy was mostly planned. Seeing it as the only way to get out of my house and to get away from my alcholic mother. Pty... thank you for the advice. It means alot. And I do need to focus on my own child on the way. But Dustyn and I are in this together, so when I see a potential problem arising, Of course, i want to help. Mom26, though I do agree that it's a young age for both of us to be having a baby but ultimately I saw it as a way out. And I know that sounds horrible and all but I want to be a better mother than mine ever was. Thank you All for the valuble Advice. Please if you have any other comments please e-mail me at [email protected].

              Comment


              • #8
                Lily,

                I will say that I don't think your decisions have been extremely intelligent But, you have been honest, and at no time have you been rude, disrespectful or argumentative. Those are pretty rare qualities these days, so kudos to you for that!

                Comment

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