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Colorado sais my boyfriends new family dont matter!

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  • Colorado sais my boyfriends new family dont matter!

    My boyfriend pays 500 a month for child support. He is only 21 and I am19. We just had a baby and we are having financial problems. child support took all our tax money and now they are having a modification to get more money. My boyfriend called them and told them he has a family to support and they said my daughter and I dont matter. Is this true what can we do? My daughter also needs things we cant get her. There have been some weeks we dont have food in our fridge.

  • #2
    Originally posted by Chavarria
    My boyfriend pays 500 a month for child support. He is only 21 and I am19. We just had a baby and we are having financial problems. child support took all our tax money and now they are having a modification to get more money. My boyfriend called them and told them he has a family to support and they said my daughter and I dont matter. Is this true what can we do? My daughter also needs things we cant get her. There have been some weeks we dont have food in our fridge.
    Ok are you currently working? Did you know he had a support order open before you decided to have a child? You are aware altho he says "he has a family to support", his other family needs to be supported as well.

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    • #3
      repli

      yes I new about it. I am in school and I had to get a part time job because of the situation we are in. I understand he has a daughter to support but not her. The last two times we seen his daughter she was dresed in clothes and shoes that didnt fit her, and the mom had nice expensive clothes. He is still getting paid the same salary and he just paid off in full amount the back child support and they still want more money. Can they get more monery. Can we ask for a modification to lower it. It is so hard to get our baby what she needs with only 30 dollars a month left over after paying the bills and child support.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Chavarria
        yes I new about it. I am in school and I had to get a part time job because of the situation we are in. I understand he has a daughter to support but not her. The last two times we seen his daughter she was dresed in clothes and shoes that didnt fit her, and the mom had nice expensive clothes. He is still getting paid the same salary and he just paid off in full amount the back child support and they still want more money. Can they get more monery. Can we ask for a modification to lower it. It is so hard to get our baby what she needs with only 30 dollars a month left over after paying the bills and child support.
        On these forums you will always find parents who feel they are paying the parent's lifestyle vs the child(ren)'s.

        He can go to court and file for a modification. Is there a visitation order in effect. If there isn't he should file for visitation and the amount of time spent with him would possibly lower the support some.

        These days depending on your judge/magistrate and how they see the situation it could go either way.

        What state are you in?
        Last edited by Tahari; 03-08-2006, 11:26 AM.

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        • #5
          We are planing on getting visitation rights because every time we try to see her the mother refuses and tries to hit me. For the childs birthday we went to take her present and to try to take her out. I was waiting in the car and she came out trying to fight me. But she never lets us see her. the baby is now a year old and she always tells him that he should have told her they werent gonna be together so she could have got an abortion. Could this work for us in the court? Would you recomend us to say this?

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Chavarria
            We are planing on getting visitation rights because every time we try to see her the mother refuses and tries to hit me. For the childs birthday we went to take her present and to try to take her out. I was waiting in the car and she came out trying to fight me. But she never lets us see her. the baby is now a year old and she always tells him that he should have told her they werent gonna be together so she could have got an abortion. Could this work for us in the court? Would you recomend us to say this?
            No because it will all be hearsay. Once he files for visitation she will have no choice, but to let the father see his child or she'll be in contempt. At this time, she doesn't have to let him see the child.

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            • #7
              And what happens when she starts working will the amount lower or increase? I heard that she doesnt have to work until the baby is 18 months? What do you know about this?

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Chavarria
                And what happens when she starts working will the amount lower or increase? I heard that she doesnt have to work until the baby is 18 months? What do you know about this?
                She doesn't have to work until she actually wants to work. You can not make a parent work on either side really. If she were to go back to work, it could get a little uglier than what it is now because she could say she needs more money for childcare now that she has to work. Tred lightly. If you can seek counsel that would be great, but if you can't, try and get the filing for visitation as quickly as possible.

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                • #9
                  Counsel from whom? Are you a parent with child support situations or a lawyer? if you dont mine me asking?

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                  • #10
                    You said they cant make a parent work from eighter side but yet the father still has to give the money. Is is just for us to have to ask for food as long as he pays the support money. If it werent for my 100 dollars a week we would only have money for rent,bills, and child support. Our needs dont count, My daughters needs dont count? Could colorado leave us on the streets so they can get there money? Shouldnt they take in cinsideration our expenses before calculating what he should pay? other fathers make more money and they pay less.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Chavarria
                      You said they cant make a parent work from eighter side but yet the father still has to give the money. Is is just for us to have to ask for food as long as he pays the support money. If it werent for my 100 dollars a week we would only have money for rent,bills, and child support. Our needs dont count, My daughters needs dont count? Could colorado leave us on the streets so they can get there money? Shouldnt they take in cinsideration our expenses before calculating what he should pay? other fathers make more money and they pay less.
                      It can happen. She being the custodial parent doesn't have to work. What is her situation? It's not like 500 a month can really carry someone for the month unless they are not living on their own or have expenses.She has the child. Your boyfriend on the other hand has to pay because he is the non custodial. He could easily quit his job and go into hiding. That's what i mean by not having to work. As far as being left out in the cold on the streets, unfortunately it has happend and will continue to happen if parents don't step up and do what they have to do as parents unfortunately. When you have government governing your household, it is never a pretty sight.

                      I am a parent receiving child support. I have a lawyer.

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                      • #12
                        She lives with her mother and doesnt have a car or cell phone so but other than that I dont know. What is your situation if I can ask? You know every one always takes the father and the new girl friend as the bad persons thats how they are treating us but only if they new the true story. im not doing this because I dont like her. I love that little girl and I would love for her and my daughter to meet. I just dont want to see my daughter in need of things. I understand her situation as well because my sister is going through the same. Before we had our daughter we never had problems with the ammount that we gave her, but after our daughter came things changed. I only want the best for my daughter just as you do for your kids. Our kids shouldnt suffer for our mistakes but unfortunately they do. not only her daugter mines as well. You may say its my fault but you cant tell your heart who to love and who not to love.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Chavarria
                          She lives with her mother and doesnt have a car or cell phone so but other than that I dont know. What is your situation if I can ask? You know every one always takes the father and the new girl friend as the bad persons thats how they are treating us but only if they new the true story. im not doing this because I dont like her. I love that little girl and I would love for her and my daughter to meet. I just dont want to see my daughter in need of things. I understand her situation as well because my sister is going through the same. Before we had our daughter we never had problems with the ammount that we gave her, but after our daughter came things changed. I only want the best for my daughter just as you do for your kids. Our kids shouldnt suffer for our mistakes but unfortunately they do. not only her daugter mines as well. You may say its my fault but you cant tell your heart who to love and who not to love.
                          Your boyfriend can request if he hadn't already to have an income imputed for her even though she isn't working.

                          I do understand being a CP how it can get ugly between a new girlfriend and old one. Also from reading it sounds as though the children are barely a year apart am I correct? For a moment just think how you'd feel if your boyfriend now did that to you. Your baby is barely a year old and here he comes with another one on the way? I am actually dealing with that right now. My ex has a child now that is a year apart from our own. It can get very messy and sticky.

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                          • #14
                            How does that work about the incom from her?

                            If that was to happen to me i would so mad at him not at his new gir or baby. Like I said I understand her. I appologised to her but it isnt realy my fault or my daughters. They werent together when she got pregnat. When he found out she was pregnat he got with her to try to work things out. They always fought and he didnt love her so he ended their relationship and told her he would be there for the baby but she wanted him. And now she doesnt let him and his daugther be together if he is notwith her. We have been wanting to get a court for visitation rights or some custody BUT WE DONT KNOW IF THAT COSTS, if it does we cant afort it now. IF SHE LIVES WITH HER MOTHER DOESNT WORK OR GO TO SCHOOL OR HAVE ANY EXPENSES DOES THAT MAKE A DIFERENCE?

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                            • #15
                              Do you mind if I give my own worthless opinion here?

                              A thought: As the girlfriend, you should let only the father deal with the mother of the little girl right now. I don't mean to sound harsh, but I was the mother in this situation, and whether you mean to or not, you may seem threatning to the mother. She probably thinks that her daughter has a mother and does not need you around to interfere. I'm not saying that is what you are doing, just how she may be perceiving it.

                              No, you can't tell your heart who to love, but you can make reasonable, responsible choices when it comes to reproduction. The children are a year apart. The father of the children didn't think to marry either of the mothers before he created children with them. You bear some responsibility for bringing a child into this situation.

                              If it comes down to it, you can quit school for now and get a full time job to make up the difference you need to support your child. Why do you think it is fair to take away the support the other child has known simply to support a child you voluntarily brought into this situation? I know, birth control does not always work, but, gee whiz, it sure seems to fail all the time with young girls and boys that have no means to support the children they are creating. I suppose you could have also overlooked one sure fire way to avoid pregnancy. Don't have sex, especially with someone that has a pregnant girlfriend.
                              HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                              How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                              (unique up on him)
                              How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                              (same way)

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