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verbal abuse

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  • verbal abuse

    I feel like I'm in a verbally abusive relationship with my husband of thirteen years. I told him to "stop" tonight when he was yelling at me and calling me names I can't print here. He just told me to stop telling him what to do... I sometimes think that I'm making to much of these outbursts. They don't happen every week or anything like that... Please let me know if I need to figure out if this is something I need to just let go since it doesn't happen very often. Usually it's just when he has been very busy at work and has had a couple of beers.... thank you...kat

  • #2
    I know how you feel. I have ben going through it for 19 years and it has really dwindles me down to no confidence whatsoever. I gained alot of weight and I tried to join the y but he always had something for me to do so I wouldn't get to go to the y. Mine used to be physical abuse up until 6 years ago when his mother died. Now it is just mental and verbal, name calling everyday and fighting constantly in front of everyone. I left once a few years ago for 2 weeks and came back and it was better, we even did counseling, it worked and he became the man I married years ago. Now he is so controlling and calls me every name in the book. I have a few friends at work whom give me the strength to deal with each day and I joined Curves so that when I get to my desired weight, I am going to leave him high and dry and make him pay. His father was also verbally abusive to his wife and she became an alcoholic because of it.

    My advice is to be strong and get out, there is always someone to help you somewhere. I went to a YWCA years ago and they put me in a shelter and then my parents took me in. Now they are older and I wouldn't want to put them through anything again.

    Keep in touch. I wish you lived near me. I would love to meet you.


    • #3
      In reply to verbal abuse...

      I feel firmly that YOU will KNOW when enough is too much. The problem for people lies in not doing anything about it, but I think we ALWAYS know, even if we're paralyzed with fear, etc. I am going through that right now. My boyfriend of almost 5 years has become the worst he's ever been. I won't get into details right now, but let me assure you... It's bad. And I finally truly know that it is too much, not getting better, I've tried every angle and he's beginning to look groser and groser to me. I think the time will come (albeit overdue) that I will find a way to get him to vamoos! Good luck to all, let us all be strong!


      • #4
        None of us are you, but I suggest calling 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) to see about getting a referral to talk to someone more objective to see if this qualifies as abuse you need to be concerned about. They may be able to provide strategies to deal with this, or if you choose to leave it or need a safe place to escape.
        Also, do you think your husband is mentally ill or something like that? Sometimes outbursts happen periodically due to mental illness that can be controlled by medication, or counseling of some kind.


        • #5

          [Qwhy do you think he stop beating u whem his mother died


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