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Criminal Domestic Violence - S. Carolina - Need help now!! South Carolina

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  • Criminal Domestic Violence - S. Carolina - Need help now!! South Carolina

    My fiancee and I got into a really bad argument on June 23rd. Things turned very violent, alcohol was involved, I only had 2 margaritas, but he drank almost a 5th of Jack Daniels. I went after him, he went after me. But I got the worse end of the stick, so I was ticked off, and went and filed assault charges on him. I figured "yeah, this will teach him a lesson." What I didn't know, is that because guns and knives were involved, he was charged with "Criminal Domestic Violence - Assault of a High and Aggravated Nature" with a $60,000 bond. He's now looking at 5 years in prison, and he doesn't deserve that because we were both equally at fault. As a part of his bond restriction, he can have no contact with me. And I just found out, I'm pregnant, with our second child.

    I need him around for this pregnancy, not locked up in prison for 5 years for a punishment that didn't warrant the crime. I know if I retract my statement and say it all was a lie, then it's still in the state's hands. But if they have no evidence from me, and I say that the bruises I had were from falling down or something, then is it the state's burden of proof to prove something against him if they have no statement whatsoever from me? I'm scared to death here and I really need some advice. I have a 4 yr old and a 2 year old from a previous marriage, and our 6 month old who was born last December. I was NOT prepared for this, but abortion is not an option with me, or him either for that matter. Like I said, as a part of the bond restriction, he can not have any contact with me, so he doesn't know yet.

    I need help. Please.
    Last edited by APP2003; 07-13-2007, 07:27 AM.

  • #2
    ???

    That was NOT the icon I wanted to put up there.... no smiles here..... so please don't think I'm being facitious about anything.... I tried to put an exclamation mark.....

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    • #3
      And you somehow think giving birth in prision is a better option? You called in the violence and now you want to fabricate a story to cover it up. Do you know what that is called? Not to mention the fact that what the both of you were doing was not what is considered a healthy enviornment for any of the children. You need to get some help for yourself, anger management, help with your problem with drinking and violence. There is help to be had and getting yourself straightened out before the birth of this child happens in prision or you and the fetus are killed seems like your best option.

      If you didn't expect the law to act when you called in the episode why did you call it in? To teach him a lesson is what you posted, well what did you expect when alcohol and weapons were involved, a slap on the wrist and send him back for a repeat preformance? You don't get to manipulate the laws that way. You don't get to choose what punishment fits the crime. Further you are asking for much bigger problems to now try to lie your or his way out of this. Use this time to get yourself some help and attempt to be a fit mother to your exsisting as well as your pending child.
      Last edited by BnThrDnTht; 07-13-2007, 08:44 PM.

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      • #4
        So you mean to tell us that you were drinking knowing that you were pregnant?That would be your first mistake, and second you called the cops for a reason you can not tell us that this is the first time this happened or you would have never got the cops involved.

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        • #5
          Wow

          You guys are so much help. As typical for this board, Senior Members bashing Junior Members for asking LEGAL questions, I didn't ask you to judge my morality, NOR were any of the kids present at the night in question (spending the night at Grandma's). Was I drinking while pregnant? Not with my knowledge, I had no idea, I have 3 other very intelligent, brilliant, beautiful girls and I don't even drink with them AROUND. This happened on June 23rd, I just found out I was pregnant last night. So thanks for your help to both of you morally, self-righteous, indignant *******s.

          Oh, and I'll get help for that drinking problem I have. I didn't know having 2 margaritas every few MONTHS was considered a "drinking problem."
          Last edited by APP2003; 07-13-2007, 08:32 AM.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by APP2003 View Post
            You guys are so much help. As typical for this board, Senior Members bashing Junior Members for asking LEGAL questions, I didn't ask you to judge my morality, NOR were any of the kids present at the night in question (spending the night at Grandma's). Was I drinking while pregnant? Not with my knowledge, I had no idea, I have 3 other very intelligent, brilliant, beautiful girls and I don't even drink with them AROUND. This happened on June 23rd, I just found out I was pregnant last night. So thanks for your help to both of you morally, self-righteous, indignant *******s.

            Oh, and I'll get help for that drinking problem I have. I didn't know having 2 margaritas every few MONTHS was considered a "drinking problem."
            Legally speaking, if you continue on the course you are on, ALL of your children will be removed from your care.
            Please Note: My "warm and fuzzy" font is not working, therefor my posts will be direct and to the point.

            Thank you in advance for your anticipated understanding.

            Bay

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            • #7
              Ha ha!

              Originally posted by Morgana
              Hey senior members, I didn know you were indigent!!
              (Sorry couldnt help it)
              Oh, that's a shame that you "didn" know that they (you) are indignant!

              Hey, if you're trying to be cute, at least make sure you don't misspell your insults....

              This is the last thing I have to post on this. I came looking for a LEGAL answer to a LEGAL question, but instead I ran across the mecca of sanctimonious, pious group of people on the Internet. I could get better help from a bunch of emo teenagers on Myspace.... Yeah, thanks anyway.

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              • #8
                You say there was a domestic situation where there were bruises and weapons involved. I am guessing that pictures were taken.

                The pictures are proof enough of your boyfriend's crime in most court's opinion. Even if you recant your testimony at this point, it will not only not help his case but may hurt your own chances of retaining custody of your own children.

                That is not judgemental of anything you have said. It is the way family court works. You are not the first domestic partner that thought about such a thing and wanted to just make the case go away. Trying to do so will just bring your own judgement into question.

                Get your boyfriend a really good lawyer that will, hopefully, try to find him a way to stay out of jail. Anger management, separation from you and the children and a long cooling off period are a foregone conclusion, however.

                Now... my judgement. You should reevaluate this relationship. You two were fighting with deadly weapons. You were one drunken mistake away from being a headline in the morning's newspaper. Even if the heavens opened up and your boyfriend was released tomorrow, you two need some serious time in front of a counselor. Him, for the anger and violence. You, for the anger, the violence and for the acceptance of such behavior in your life.
                Not everything that makes you mad, sad or uncomfortable is legally actionable.

                I am not now nor ever was an attorney.

                Any statements I make are based purely upon my personal experiences and research which may or may not be accurate in a court of law.

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                • #9
                  I believe every person deserves to be treated with dignity and respect.
                  Two things: first, abuse is never okay; second, you are not alone. You need to ask the right kind of help, not help of getting back into a abusive relationship with the father of your children. You may depend on your abuser to care for you but Love is deeper than what you are immune to. You probably don't know any other way of life. It's a sickness, a disease. Its a matter of responding instead of reacting and your reactions had put your boyfriend in jail. If you go back on your words, they will throw you in jail, for perjury. You are not being honest to yourself, and to your children. Do you rather sacrifice your children for a good time with your boyfriend. It doesn't matter if he is the father to your children. Don't be weak minded, be a woman not a girl. Get yourself together and get serious about your life. There are many programs out there for woman w/children.
                  Your children deserves to live in a world free from violence and a safe home. Build a foundation for your children and be a good cheer and a good mother. Its only when we are alone when we learn of ourselves.
                  If CPS doesn't get involved, your children will have emotional and behavior problems when they get older they will try to commit suicide or start cutting themselves, or get into drugs themselves and disrespect you as a mother. Protect your children or give them away to someone that will.
                  Provide counseling and emotional support for you and your children.
                  Last edited by Amberm; 08-23-2007, 10:09 PM.

                  Comment

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