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Should I be able to stop support in NJ? New Jersey

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  • Should I be able to stop support in NJ? New Jersey

    I have been paying CS in NJ for many years. My son turned 18 last February and is due to be 19 on 2/1/09. He "barely" graduated from High School and didn't want to go to college. His mom enrolled him for 12 hours at community college in the fall. He was recently expelled for misconduct and has to receive a counselors release to attend the winter/spring semester. I paid for 1/2 of the tuition and his books along with continued CS. He has a part-time job and he bought a new car which wasn't my idea but his and his mom's who co-signed the note for him.

    He doesn't want to be in school. He actually failed all of his courses last semester so the money is gone and the credits didn't count. His mom is insisting he get his visit in with counselors to be released to attend the winter/spring semester at community college as she has already paid in full for him to attend 12 hours minimum. Still don't know if he can even attend the school yet but i'm wanting to seek an empancipation order on him as I feel he is wasting the tuition when he doesn't want to be there.

    I feel she is keeping him pushed to attend (which he rarely does) to keep CS going. She makes more money than I do as it is. If he is "enrolled" but not passing or barely attending school, what are my chances at release?

    He wants to move to another state and 'work' and go to school but he can't afford to move anyway with having a part time job and a car payment. He won't make the effort to get a second job either or effort to do well in school. What are my chances? I want to do the right thing but I feel money is being wasted by him and abused by her.

  • #2
    You are in a tough situation. New Jersey has some of the strictest child support laws in the nation - even more strict than Californiam where I practice. Unlike many states where child support automatically terminates at a fixed age (e.g., age 18) or specific triggering event (e.g., high school graduation), this is not the case in NJ. I am hyperlinking you to a Divorcenet article that I think you might find of interest:

    Bottom Line: You need to discuss your situation with a NJ family law attorney.
    Barry S. Phillips, CPA

    IRS Circular 230 Disclosure: This response is intended to provide general information and written for educational purposes only. It does not establish a client relationship. This communication is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of (i) avoiding tax-related penalties under the Internal Revenue Code or (ii) promoting, marketing or recommending to any party any matters addressed herein.


    • #3
      Thanks for the info Barry. I've contacted an atty in NJ and hopefully have an appt tomorrow.

      I had no idea how long NJ likes to keep parents paying CS. Seems slightly corrupt.


      • #4
        Oh you haven't heard anything

        Originally posted by pavingman View Post
        Thanks for the info Barry. I've contacted an atty in NJ and hopefully have an appt tomorrow.

        I had no idea how long NJ likes to keep parents paying CS. Seems slightly corrupt.

        My brother who has been unable to maintain substantial work for the last few years due to his health has been railroaded by the NJ support system for years.

        First let me tell you, his son is 23 years old, just finishing up his 5th year in college ( he will be graduating with 2 degrees). My brother had been paying 750 a month plus another 130 a month towards arrears (steming from his ex telling the judge he didn't provide enough support to their son during a 4 year reconciliation and the judge agreed and thus the arrearages) anyway 880 a month total. My brother at the time was making 10 bucks an hour he had enough left over from his check to cover his gas to get back and forth to work. He stopped working and therefore stopped paying support 3 months after his son's 21st birthday. My brother requested him to be emancipated and the judge said no and added on 50% of his college bills. CAN YOU IMAGINE?!! Mind you my brother can barely stand for 10 minutes at a time let alone get and keep a job. I have since filed in NJ on his behalf (his POA) and we are hoping to get this straight once and for all, meanwhile my brother is living in PA and has a hearing this week for contempt charges because he can not make his full court ordered payments (the county where he lives filed the charges). Now don't get me wrong I am a mom of 3 kids and their dad pays his support usually a month behind but he pays it so I know that custodial parents need they financial assistance from the absent parents but my brother has surely gotten a raw deal in NJ. Oh and to add insult to injury, his ex makes about 90k a year has a beautiful house in a good town, drives a new car as does my nephew, whereas my brother lost his home and his new wife lost her car. Child support should be fair.


        • #5
          Now I'm really depressed

          I appreciate your response to this thread. I have a court date set for 3/27 in NJ having filed a motion for emancipation in February and my ex doing her response to stop it. She wants oral argument before the judge-wants to plead her case of our son's need to continue $85 t-shirts, designer shoes, 5 star restaurants, and attending school when he feels like it.

          My attorney thinks we have a good case of emancipation (since this spring my son didn't enroll full time as a student-he took 1 class of which he is half attending). After reading about your brothers case in Court, I am now sorely afraid i'll have to keep paying forever. I don't mind helping pay for school but he isn't full time as it is and can't pass when he goes. Now my son won't even speak to me since I filed the motion. Good luck to all who have to deal with the BS in NJ.


          • #6
            Don't be worried

            I think you have a really good case considering he is not attending full time. I have a very long brief concerning support during college and college costs. One thing to mention (I'm sure your lawyer knows this) is that the court is to take into consideration the ability of the child to earn when not is school, ie summer and long breaks from school, also the use of tuition assistance, loans, grants and the like. I have done so much research and have gotten a lot of case law that my brother thinks I should write a Might be a good idea, a mom that collects child support writing a book to help dads getting screwed by the system.... Anyway the point is, don't go in feeling defeated, I'm sure you have a good attorney. I would like to bring to your attention though my brother did request emancipation and lost and because his lawyer didn't request a reduction at the same time so he had to continue paying the same crazy *** amount.

            I plan on posting more of my findings on case law and legalities as I come across them. Wish me luck court is on Friday in front of Coogan. And good luck to you next week.


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