Grandmother needs answers Virginia

[Tracy1966]

My grandchildren have been living with me for a little over a year. They were placed with me because they had been abused. It was thought by there mom. But never proved and never taken to court. She just agreed to give me custody. Even thought she is not happy about that. She wanted them to live with me, but her to have all say so. Anyway to my questions these children, there are 3 have all different fathers. The first father said he had no problem with me having custody and came to court to say that. The second child who is listed on the B.C. but may not be the dad is in jail he had to be appointed a guardian of lightum. What should I expect if he says he does not want me to have custody? The third child's father did not show up and did not get his paper deliverd to him even though we told him about the court date, because he refused to give us his address, because he thinks we are trying to get child support. It has never been proved that he is the dad he has never had a DNA test done yet. My daughter says if he has the DNA test done and it comes back he is his son he will not give up custody. He just lost a case of trying to get his other 3 kids, because he does not have a place for them to live, plus he has been in and out of jail. How much chance do you think I have with this with out getting a lawyer? Because I really can't afford one. I don't belive in taking kids away from there parents but in this case these kid need some stability. Can anyone give me some answers?

[mommyof4]

The best advice I can give you is to take this to an atty. I know that is not what you want to hear, but you are looking at a possibility of 3 seperate custody suits. (well, probably 2 as the first Dad is in agreement).

Paternity will have to be established for the 3rd father before he can do anything.

I can't figure out if paternity was established for the second father or not.

[Tracy1966]

sure hope I get some more replies. I can use all the answers I can get.

[Baystategirl]

sure hope I get some more replies. I can use all the answers I can get.

You received the only answer anyone here can reasonably give you. You have too much happening to NOT consult with a Family Law Attorney.

[ShakinThingzUp]

I agree with the others, that you need an attorney...

But, what I will add to that, is that when dealing with an attorney, you are able to set the limits on how much he does & how much you do yourself, during a custody case.

When we fought for custody of my step-daughter... our attorney gave us a base fee which we borrowed the money to pay up front, and he kept us informed as to how much we were delving into that, in order to help keep costs as low as possible.

We did the footwork - we got criminal records of my daughters bio-mom and all her boyfriends ourselves. We got all my daughters doctor records, school records, etc.

We kept notes of all interactions, took pictures of the children at visitations, etc.

There is a lot WE were able to do to minimize the cost of an attorney. We had to have one, just like you do... but we found one we could have an open/honest relationship with who would talk with us free the first time -- and give us suggestions on what we could do to keep costs down.

God Bless!
Amy

[Tracy1966]

Thanks that makes me feel better. I hope I can find someone like that around here.