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16 year old pregnant Louisiana

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  • 16 year old pregnant Louisiana

    I just found out that my 16 year old is pregnant. She used to live with me and decided to go live with her dad. Well I have been paying CS for 5 years now. I was wondering if I still have to continue to pay or does it stop.... Gosh i wish she would of stayed with me....
    A Confused Mother
    Junior Member
    Last edited by A Confused Mother; 05-29-2006, 01:38 PM. Reason: Rewrite Title

  • #2
    Yes you will still be required to pay support
    http://www.gestaltmediation.com/

    Comment


    • #3
      Your 16 year old child is PREGNANT and your main concern is whether or not you have to continue to pay child support?!?!

      Comment


      • #4
        Its a long storie.....

        My relationship with my daughter has went downhill since she has left and went with her dad.....We have grown apart in so many ways. Everytime I turn around her dad is trying to screw me over because I left him. He said I will pay for the rest of my life for leaving him. He lets her do whatever she wants to....Im the bad person because all I wanted is for her to get a good life. But Im WRONG for that. Well I kept telling her she had her whole life to have sex and to be an adult. But she said I didnt know what I was talking about. She only comes around me when she wants something or is in trouble.... She uses me against her dad all the time. Saturday was the lst time I saw her in months... Thats only because she needed someone to buy her a Pg test.....My story is totally different.....If you knew everything about it you wouldnt Judge me.....I was very upset about her being pg. What am I suppose to tell her now.... When she didnt want to listen to anything I had to say before.....Lastnight she called me and chewed me out for calling her dad and telling him she was PG....I said what did your dad tell you... She said He told me it was my decision to do what I wanted with it.. I told her That is very unresponsible of him... You are only 16.. She got mad and Hung up on me.....So what am I suppose to do when her dad slaps her on the hand and tells her its going to be ok.... If she would of stayed with me... All of this wouldnt of happened....Because I was raised better than that... Sorry I dont mean to get upset.......

        Comment


        • #5
          not the only mom with this issue

          Originally posted by A Confused Mother
          My relationship with my daughter has went downhill since she has left and went with her dad.....We have grown apart in so many ways. Everytime I turn around her dad is trying to screw me over because I left him. He said I will pay for the rest of my life for leaving him. He lets her do whatever she wants to....Im the bad person because all I wanted is for her to get a good life. But Im WRONG for that. Well I kept telling her she had her whole life to have sex and to be an adult. But she said I didnt know what I was talking about. She only comes around me when she wants something or is in trouble.... She uses me against her dad all the time. Saturday was the lst time I saw her in months... Thats only because she needed someone to buy her a Pg test.....My story is totally different.....If you knew everything about it you wouldnt Judge me.....I was very upset about her being pg. What am I suppose to tell her now.... When she didnt want to listen to anything I had to say before.....Lastnight she called me and chewed me out for calling her dad and telling him she was PG....I said what did your dad tell you... She said He told me it was my decision to do what I wanted with it.. I told her That is very unresponsible of him... You are only 16.. She got mad and Hung up on me.....So what am I suppose to do when her dad slaps her on the hand and tells her its going to be ok.... If she would of stayed with me... All of this wouldnt of happened....Because I was raised better than that... Sorry I dont mean to get upset.......
          Dear confused:

          My daughter got pregnant at 16 so I do know how you feel. More than anything this will test you but stay strong. You will have many sleepless and worrying nights, but you have to go outside the box and just be MOM, support support support....It isn't easy and you want to rant and rave and ask her how could she do this, what was she thinking...She is just as hurt and angry as both of you maybe more..She needs your love and guidance now more than ever. My daughter went off the deep end with the divorce and got in the wrong crowd seeking the wrong attention..Now she is 19, full time working, starting online college classes, and has a wonderful man in her life and 2 children 2 and 3 now. Be there for her and do NOT turn away now. She asked me a few months ago ...mom how could you always be there no matter what? Why didn't you give up on me?...The answer was the simplest thing really..I told her, " You are my daughter no matter what and I love you."
          I hope both parents can work on this together for her and put aside the anger in the marriage. She is the one that matters more now.. I went through all alone so know the struggle, but now it was worth it. I will say a prayer for you and your daughter. Is she adamant on keeping the child? Mine was as she says now that this baby would be hers to love. She hadn't a clue on how it would be and said so, that she loved me and was glad I didn't give up on her and she hopes she is as good a mom as I am.."Oh yeah, and could she call if she was worried...Moms and dads are always that. Good luck.

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          • #6
            Thanks for the reply. I have been down in the dumps all day.. I guess in shock, because i would of never thought this would happen this soon. But she has no Guidance with her dad. He lets her do whatever she wants to. That is why she didnt want to stay with me. Because I was raised kinda stricked. I knew better to do anything wrong. But kids these days are not raised like we was. She is so mad at me for telling her dad. But it had to be done. She has alot of growing up to do. Her dad dont see that. I have told him over and over and told him to see the warnings but once again. I dont know what im talking about...She knows im here for her. But as far as her dad. We will never see eye to eye. He was a very abusive man. The last I heard he told her it was up to her on what she wanted to do... Looks like they are making this decision without me. I feel like a crutch because she only comes by me when she needs something or is in trouble.. what am i suppose to do? Thanks for the prayers, I just keep praying all will be ok..

            Comment


            • #7
              what to do

              Dear confused,

              And it is only the beginning too. You can try and see if she is scheduling doctor appts, taking vitamins, ask if she has names....You just need something to get in the door with her. I had to repeat it numerous times with my daughter. She was actually six months before she went to the doctor. She had gotten into the wrong crowd, had runaway many times, we went through the court system, probation officers etc... The longest and worst 4 yrs of mylife. And with No responses from the father, even when court tried to contact him. He said she made her bed she had to deal with it. Just try and get some communication going first and say that she needs to think of the life inside her now, that is the most important thing. She will need to know(and she will, eventually) that you are there for her no matter what. Too bad it took Lapree(my granddaughter who is 3 in August) for her to straighten up. If she is as angry and hurt as my daughter was and plain not THINKING...she may get the wrong information from so called friends who 9 times of 10 will not have anything to do with her once she is no longer FUN..
              I would not want to go through this ever again, but now I would not change that beatuful little girl who thinks the sun rises with grandma and can call me. That smile when she sees me and those little legs running for the hug are priceless. She had my heart the second she was born.

              Comment


              • #8
                Thanks for the reply. I feel better. I have been sitting her all day upset and confused. I wish she would of stayed living with me. She would of been in a better environment and she wouldnt be in this situation. Thanks again.

                Comment


                • #9
                  In the same boat

                  Hi there. We just found out Saturday that we are in the same boat as you. My 17yo step daughter informed us she is pregnant. She lives with her mom and has for the past 2 years. Her father and I had custody, but let her go live with her mom at her demanding at the age of 15.

                  Ours to is a long long story. She has very little to do with our family because we have expectation and her mom doesn't. Her mom is her FRIEND, not her mom. She dropped out of school when she turned 17 and still has no job or GED. She was dating a 23 yo, but I guess the father of the baby is 18. We see my step daughter maybe 3 or 4 times a year. And it is usually when she needs or wants something or if it her brothers birthday.
                  It is usually then that we get the song and dance of "I'm sorry, I want to start being an active part of this family again. I've changed, etc..." Our visits are all good visits, but once she leaves, she won't return our calls for weeks.... A constant emotional rollercoaster with her.....

                  I understand you question about child support. I have the same one. She will be 18 in October, but our decree states that is she hasn't graduated from high school or gotten her GED, we pay till she is 19. I am just wondering if this changes things since she is now pregnant and due in January.

                  Hope to hear from you.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by karla
                    Hi there. We just found out Saturday that we are in the same boat as you. My 17yo step daughter informed us she is pregnant. She lives with her mom and has for the past 2 years. Her father and I had custody, but let her go live with her mom at her demanding at the age of 15.

                    Ours to is a long long story. She has very little to do with our family because we have expectation and her mom doesn't. Her mom is her FRIEND, not her mom. She dropped out of school when she turned 17 and still has no job or GED. She was dating a 23 yo, but I guess the father of the baby is 18. We see my step daughter maybe 3 or 4 times a year. And it is usually when she needs or wants something or if it her brothers birthday.
                    It is usually then that we get the song and dance of "I'm sorry, I want to start being an active part of this family again. I've changed, etc..." Our visits are all good visits, but once she leaves, she won't return our calls for weeks.... A constant emotional rollercoaster with her.....

                    I understand you question about child support. I have the same one. She will be 18 in October, but our decree states that is she hasn't graduated from high school or gotten her GED, we pay till she is 19. I am just wondering if this changes things since she is now pregnant and due in January.

                    Hope to hear from you.
                    To both Karla and A Confused Mother, pregnancy does not render a minor emancipated. The pregnant girl does have MEDICAL emancipation, as it pertains to her and her child's health care. Unless and until the girls are emancipated either by a court or marriage, you will both be held responsible for paying child support for as long as it is legally ordered.
                    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                    (unique up on him)
                    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                    (same way)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Karla

                      Can you please email me....I tried to email but it didnt work and the message thing didnt work either...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Confused

                        Confused email me at [email protected]

                        I'd be happy to call your or contact you.

                        Karla

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by karla
                          Hi there. We just found out Saturday that we are in the same boat as you. My 17yo step daughter informed us she is pregnant. She lives with her mom and has for the past 2 years. Her father and I had custody, but let her go live with her mom at her demanding at the age of 15.

                          Ours to is a long long story. She has very little to do with our family because we have expectation and her mom doesn't. Her mom is her FRIEND, not her mom. She dropped out of school when she turned 17 and still has no job or GED. She was dating a 23 yo, but I guess the father of the baby is 18. We see my step daughter maybe 3 or 4 times a year. And it is usually when she needs or wants something or if it her brothers birthday.
                          It is usually then that we get the song and dance of "I'm sorry, I want to start being an active part of this family again. I've changed, etc..." Our visits are all good visits, but once she leaves, she won't return our calls for weeks.... A constant emotional rollercoaster with her.....

                          I understand you question about child support. I have the same one. She will be 18 in October, but our decree states that is she hasn't graduated from high school or gotten her GED, we pay till she is 19. I am just wondering if this changes things since she is now pregnant and due in January.

                          Hope to hear from you.
                          Check the order again. Usually support only continues past the age of majority (18 in your husband's case) if the child has not graduated or obtained a GED AND is still enrolled in an accredited school. If she has quit school, child support may actually stop at 18.

                          BTW - YOU and your husband NEVER had custody of the child. As a step parent you have no legal rights to the child.

                          Comment

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