Wow,
Don't know where to begin, just need a little advice. I have been raising my oldest stepson since he was 14 months old and his brother since last year in may. The oldes is now turning 5. They are 13 months apart. We have a very close relationship with each other. But actually my fiancee and I are not married yet because I was in school, I needed the financial aid from filing single. I have a great job now. We are planning to get married, but are considering doing it quick. We are interested in doing a stepparent adoption, but we do not even have full custody. Do we need to establish full custody before an adoption. How long do we have to be married in NC before we can try for an adoption. The mother is not going to voluntarily give her rights away. She has been diagnosed with mental illness and in and out of centers. She has given the kids to him, but hates me, we have to hide it from her for the last 4 years, so she doesn't flip out. She will not sign full custody over to him, but the social services told her that the younger one had to live with his father also or he was going to foster care. But once they come to us nothing else is done through social services. I can't even take them to the doctor or anything, because I have no rights. I have tried to get the youngest one counseling, he has been affected by things, but they will not let me because i have no legal rights.When I got to the doctor they turn me away. His dad can't go to appointments every week, my fiancee works a lot. So take care of them all the time. It is very frustrating, don't know where to begin really. I just know that i love them very much and would like to be their parent, because I do it all anyway. Any advice is appreciated. It is frustrating to know that I do everything and she has all these rights. She has not provided any support at all the whole time they have been with us.
Don't know where to begin, just need a little advice. I have been raising my oldest stepson since he was 14 months old and his brother since last year in may. The oldes is now turning 5. They are 13 months apart. We have a very close relationship with each other. But actually my fiancee and I are not married yet because I was in school, I needed the financial aid from filing single. I have a great job now. We are planning to get married, but are considering doing it quick. We are interested in doing a stepparent adoption, but we do not even have full custody. Do we need to establish full custody before an adoption. How long do we have to be married in NC before we can try for an adoption. The mother is not going to voluntarily give her rights away. She has been diagnosed with mental illness and in and out of centers. She has given the kids to him, but hates me, we have to hide it from her for the last 4 years, so she doesn't flip out. She will not sign full custody over to him, but the social services told her that the younger one had to live with his father also or he was going to foster care. But once they come to us nothing else is done through social services. I can't even take them to the doctor or anything, because I have no rights. I have tried to get the youngest one counseling, he has been affected by things, but they will not let me because i have no legal rights.When I got to the doctor they turn me away. His dad can't go to appointments every week, my fiancee works a lot. So take care of them all the time. It is very frustrating, don't know where to begin really. I just know that i love them very much and would like to be their parent, because I do it all anyway. Any advice is appreciated. It is frustrating to know that I do everything and she has all these rights. She has not provided any support at all the whole time they have been with us.


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