>Subject: Re: www.adoptingback.com
From: [email protected] (Scarlett West)Date: 11/15/2004 9:17 PM Eastern Standard TimeMessage-id: <[email protected] >
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Dad,Trust me any mother that has her child stolen from her throughadoption and by force would love to take back her child long beforeyou ever place any expenses on her child.
I would imagine that to be true for some mothers even if her child wasn't
"stolen through adoption" by force.
It should be alot more than material things that bind you to a child.
I guess my attempt at humor failed on you. I'll be sure to give you a <sarc
alert> next time.
Some adopters have a way of making adoptees feel financially obligatedto them,
Some bioparents have a way of making their children feel financially
obligated to them
but if the public were more educated on the actual feelingsof adoptees and how they hate feeling obligated to their adopters.
No one likes to feel obligated to parents, bio- or adoptive.
Several? I guess there will always be some. I could find "several" people
who swear they were abducted by aliens.
adoptees have described their adoption experience as a slavecontract to which they are held accountable to their adopters,
I bet I could find "several" biochildren who feel the same way towards their
natural parents...
for no reason other than they bought a piece of paper stating they are thischilds legal guardians.
...for no other reason than they happened to be born to them.
All potential adopters should be educated on the very true fact thatno matter what they provide financially and how much they "love" achild, they can never provide what the child needs most, their naturalparents.
In some cases, children are not served well by their natural parents and
would benefit from adoption. Or do you disagree?
They should understand that many adoptees will fell an emptiness intheir soul their entire lives and may seek their natural families andchoose to be reuntied with them.
So true. I would like to believe that contemporary adoptive parents are
being educated to that end. It was part of my adoptive parenting classes.
This is nothing personal on the adopters behalf , but the force ofmother nature.
Mother nature can also be destructive and brutal when she wants to be.
Most adoptees will fell an inexpilcable pull towards their genticsharing relatives, and sadly most will never tell their adopters thetruth about how they really feel.
I agree, most adoptees will feel that pull towards their genetic origins.
Far from being inexplicable, it's rather predictable. I can assure you my
daughter feels as you describe.

My son rarely mentions it, but it's not because we discourage him. I think
it's a guy thing. I would like to see him reunite with his biological mother
some day.
This is nothing new, and the Adopting Back movement is gaining groundand becoming a real option for adult adoptees everywhere who want toreclaim their natural families and gentic heritage taken from them atbirth.
If the adult adoptee consents to this action, there should be nothing
standing in their way.
Peace,Scarlett West
Thank you for your response.