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Just something funny 'cause it's Friday

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  • Just something funny 'cause it's Friday

    I was reading this earlier. Just thought it was funny, especially in light of all the, "but I'm only 3 minutes late!!!" threads. My personal favorites are #9 (come on ladies...WHO hasn't this ever happened to?) and #10 (I'm sure it is a VERY common problem for men who live in big, scary cities). Enjoy.

    Here are the top 10 examples of the most unusual excuses employees offered their managers for arriving late to work:

    1. Someone was following me, and I drove all around town trying to lose them.
    2. My dog dialed 911, and the police wanted to question me about what "really" happened.
    3. My girlfriend got mad and destroyed all of my undergarments.
    4. I woke up and thought I was temporarily deaf.
    5. I just wasn't "feelin' it" this morning.
    6. I was up all night arguing with God.
    7. A raccoon stole my work shoe off my porch.
    8. I super-glued my eye thinking it was contact solution.
    9. I was putting lotion on my face when my finger went up my nose causing a nose bleed.
    10. A prostitute climbed into my car at a stop light, and I was afraid my wife would see her and think I was messing around... so I got out of the car.
    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
    (unique up on him)
    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
    (same way)

  • #2
    I am a dyslexic and sold my soul to Santa.
    “Be not niggardly of what costs thee nothing, as courtesy, counsel, & countenance.”

    --Benjamin Franklin

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