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Thread: Giving up an absent father's rights in New York

  1. #1
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    Question Giving up an absent father's rights in New York

    I have legal sole custody of my son since he was one. he is now 6 going on 7 in December.
    His father and I were never married.
    His biological father has not seen him or bothered to look for my son for 19 mos.
    Just found out last month he joined the army and wants to focus on his new family. .
    Has not paid child support for 3 mos.
    I do not want child support from him, a father is someone who raises a child not just pass $$$
    My son cries whenever his bio father is mentioned due to when his father locked a girlfriend in a closet.
    My husband of of a year who has been in my son's life since he was 2 and a 1/2 years takes care of my son, is there when he has asthma attacks, take him to school and coaches his baseball and football team wants to adopt him.
    What steps should I take?
    Last edited by LMinnerly; 10-09-2007 at 03:13 PM.

  2. #2

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    You cannot take Bio Dad's rights away on you rown or just because you want to. You can ask Bio Dad if he is willing to give up those rights however.

  3. #3
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    Thanks, but my questioned was not answered. Respond only when you have an intellegent response!

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by LMinnerly View Post
    Thanks, but my questioned was not answered. Respond only when you have an intellegent response!
    Get cross all you want your suggesting having his rights removed so an adoption can take place. My answer was accurate!

  5. #5
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    When I was granted sole custody, it was explained in writing the only rights he had was visitation and that I had to notify him, not request his advice, on any life decisions for my son for eg Religion and what state he lives. He made it clear to his family that he wants to focus on his new family and doesn't want to pay child support. I dont care about the cs. It goes to my son's trust fund. I just dont know how to ask him to relinquish his rights if he is in the military. He only has contact with his grandmother. She was the one who called me stating he wants to only focus on his new family (like I stated earlier). So, if anyone please has an intellegent answer, respond. Opinions are not helping me now.

  6. #6

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    Your not paying attention he must consent to have his rights removed. You will need that for any adoption to take place. If you desire his rights removed then you must contact him and ask him so he can do so "legally"

  7. #7
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    Ok. If he is in the War, how do I go about it? Must I wait till he returns? I have no way of contacting him only via his grandmother who only speaks to him when and if he calls. Is there another way? Maybe I should have posted my question more clear

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    My question was "What steps should I take?" Not that I want to take away rights when he stated he only wants to focus on his family and that his family did not include my son.
    Can anyone tell me what steps should I take.

  9. #9

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    You will need to consult with a Family Law Attorney and see how ones serves someone in Military. There are substitute forms of service you can use your Lawyer willknow what these are. He may also be able to be served through the Military. You are not the only person to have Family Law issues when respondent was overseas etc. Now before you shout about "I came here to get advice not be told to seek an Attorney" read the disclaimer on this site about advice.

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    Never did I write "I came here to get advice not be told to seek an Attorney" read the disclaimer on this site about advice.

    but thanks for copying and pasting the later Info.

  11. #11

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    Thread title

    Giving up an absent father's rights in New York
    You were given the steps you asked for in order to pursue this.

  12. #12
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    I am actually going through a very similar situation with my kids. My ex left the state in order to avoid child support and he hasn't seen the kids in quite a few years. I remarried obviously and now my husband and I are looking to terminate his parental rights completely and allow an adoption to take place. If I may suggest....I called around to family law attorneys looking to consult so i could prepare myself. I managed to find a lawyer that explained to me that one of two things could happen he could willingly give up his rights or you have to prove he is an unfit parent. With his being in the military you may have to contact your local recruiting office and they may be able to give you further information since to my knowledge military law and civilian laws are quit diffrent. I hope in some way this was of some use...

  13. #13
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    If your ex is in the military and he is supposed to be paying child support, I've heard of others calling his commanding officer. They will automatically deduct the amount they owe and send it to you. Check up on this though, as it is just something I heard of from a few others.

  14. #14
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    there are some laws that state as long as the person is actively deployed, you cannot pursue legal action against them

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