troubles with SH in Texas Texas Utah Vermont

[EB51]

This is my second year at this company and about 3 weeks ago, a compliant was filed againist me for SH. The lady who filed it is the head of HR too boot. It caught me by surprise when I was called into the office to be interviewed by the corporate attorney. The lady has objected to me since the day I was hired. I apparently displaced a very good friend of hers. None the less we became friends on a going out to lunch basis. We had a run in at the first of this year and after that things went down hill pretty fast. The run in consisted of me complaining about her lack of support as HR.(pretty dumb, huh) The attorney questioned me on a couple of emails where I called her "cutey pie" and on another 'gorgeous'. These emails were sent a year and a half ago and she never told me that she objected to them, as a matter of fact she said thank you. She had called me handsome a couple of times back then and I returned the favor. This is haunting me day and night, I don't feel comfortable around her. I feel as if she is getting back in any way she can. Please advise,

[ElleMD]

Advice- Don't call coworkers cutie pie and gorgeous. Seriously. It isn't professional and has no place at work.

Now that it has happened, I suggest apologizing. Explain you didn't realize it was upsetting and will refrain from doing this in the future. Then follow your word.

[mitousmom]

You need to heed ElleMD's advice about comments about the physical attributes of employees and her apology recommendation. The complainant doesn't appear to be a friend, so I don't recommend socializing with her or treating her as a friend. Maintain a professional, courteous working relationship and try not to spend much time alone with her. Learn from the incident and put it behind you, stop worrying, fretting and imagining things and get on with your life.

Notwithstanding, I hope you matter of factly presented the attorney with your chronology of the events, including when the statements were made, her response, and your suspicions about her motivation. That information needs to be a part of any record your employer maintains on the complaint.

[EB51]

ElleMD, thanks for the advise, I never did it again after that first incident. I tried apoligizing but she turned and walked away. I have left it alone and only deal with her on company business. Its obvious she is not a friend and I have learned a hard lesson. Thanks again, both you and mitousmom.