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Falsely accused of child abuse Vermont

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  • Falsely accused of child abuse Vermont

    My 9-year-old stepson has recently accused me of abusing him for 6 years now. I have NEVER touched this kid. My son (12) and my stepson got into a fight because my stepson kept calling my son "fatty", etc. I broke them up and because my stepson wouldn't stop fighting with him, held him down (with my foot) on his sleeve of his shirt. My stepson turned into a child that I have never seen before......he then pointed at me and said that I was a "liar" and I have been beating him up for years. Said weird things as I make him brush his teeth with soap, pushed him down the stairs, etc. There has never been any kind of bruising (except typical childhood stuff), no broken bones, ER visits, etc. My husband and I went to marriage counseling on Monday (not for this topic), where he (husband) told the therapist what my stepson had told him. I was totally blown away, as my husband didn't share this information with me ahead of time, even though my stepson was out of our house by that point. (We have him every other week and things emotionally and possibly physically are really bad at his Mom's house) My stepson has CAPD and though he is 9, he has had psychological tests that point to his being 4 years old. I am the one he is is closest to, as his parent's aren't really around much. I homeschooled him last year, giving up my job to do so. I have done so much for this child and I can't figure out why he turned on me like this.

    Being a mandated reporter, of course the therapist reported the case to SRS or CPS and yesterday they called my husband to tell him that they would be interviewing my stepson as well as myself and my 3 children. Which I do understand. This scares me to death though, simply because I've been falsely accused and that I'm not sure if I could lose custody of my children.

    Does anyone know what happens now?

  • #2
    They will investigate and get all sides of the story. Your step son is probably very hurt and upset (feeling that in this very emotional time for him -you choose to take your son's side and not his).
    When dealing with children that have developemental delays, it is not uncommon for them to have emotional problems and things of that nature. You may wish to check out forums on-line for parents of children with CAPD. They can help you with "real-life" techniques for dealing with him. If he has a hard time understanding and comprehending what you are saying, then it is understandable that he does not listen and "acts up". Perhaps you could find parenting classes in your area that could help you with understanding how to deal with him. (I can't imagine that holding a 9 year old down on the floor with your foot on his clothing was the best thing to do. )
    He may also be reporting real things that have happened to him...he just has the "who" mixed up. You may wish to get him therapy.
    **On a very personal note, I have a nephew who has (mild) autism. (age 10) I have often babysat him and on occasion he has gotten out of control fighting with his 8 year old brother. Boys will be boys...And I found the perfect way of dealing with it. When they fight, I take a bottle of water out of the fridge (with the sports cap nozzel thingy) and would squirt them both regardless of where in the house they were. (so my couch got wet or the carpet or whatever ..it's water!) And then they both sat in time-out, cold and wet! My sister (the mom) was in total agreement with me doing that because the 10 year old is taller than both of us and very strong. It does not hurt them and after time-out is over, they could change or in hot weather go outside and dry off. (it is no worse that a sprinkler or a water gun fight) You only have to do it a few times and just the threat will keep them in line. Just a thought!

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    • #3
      Here's the update:

      CPS found the allegations to be unsubstantiated.

      I went to the TRO hearing today, brought the letter from CPS (by myself, as apparently hubby thinks that I did beat his kid, afterall, unsubstantiated just means they couldn't prove it.) and what became of that is a mystery to me! The step-son was appointed a Guardian Ad Litem and an attorney. Is this routinely done? I really don't care about the relief from abuse order, I actually WANT to keep it in place. I'm not sure if that's an option for me at this point though. Are they trying to accuse me of abuse again? Do I have to worry about criminal charges being brought against me now or are they trying to figure out what's best for the child as far as custody goes?

      I'm sooo confused!

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