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Any Advice would be great! Maryland

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  • Any Advice would be great! Maryland

    Ok, so I am going crazy over here. My 7 year old's father is not on his birth certificate and we have never gone to court for visitation/child support. He doesn't pay me anything. I left his father because he abused me and it was starting to affect our son. (I never reported it) I told his father that he can see his son as long as he doesn't hurt him.

    Recently my son has been having anger issues and it has been getting worse. Just yesterday he had a huge melt down where he was banging his head off the floor and then he told me "I want to kill myself, I wish I was never born" Ok, so I'm freaked out about this, so I calmly ask him why he would want to hurt himself and he told me "I want to hurt myself because my daddy hurts me" Now after talking to him it seems like his father might be mentally abusing him. My son says he doesn't want to see him because he's scared of his dad. His father was supposed to get him this weekend, but now I can't let him go. I'm going crazy over here. I've called a psychiatrist and set up an appointment for my child, and I guess I'm going to be going from there.

    My son's father right now is on probation for assaulting his ex-girlfriend and he just got arrested for a DWI making him violate his probation so he might be going to jail. My son says his father drinks around him and smokes around him, even though doctors have said not too because he has really bad allergies. I'm scared for my son, a 7 year old should not want to kill himself, he should be happy. Would you as a mother look into getting his rights taken away? I have been married for 4 years now and my husband is willing to adopt him, but only if it's best for my son. Right now that's what I'm thinking. I just don't know what to do. Should I call a lawyer and do something or wait until he talks to the psychiatrist??

    Thanks you!

  • #2
    Originally posted by Gibson06 View Post
    Ok, so I am going crazy over here. My 7 year old's father is not on his birth certificate and we have never gone to court for visitation/child support. He doesn't pay me anything. I left his father because he abused me and it was starting to affect our son. (I never reported it) I told his father that he can see his son as long as he doesn't hurt him.

    Recently my son has been having anger issues and it has been getting worse. Just yesterday he had a huge melt down where he was banging his head off the floor and then he told me "I want to kill myself, I wish I was never born" Ok, so I'm freaked out about this, so I calmly ask him why he would want to hurt himself and he told me "I want to hurt myself because my daddy hurts me" Now after talking to him it seems like his father might be mentally abusing him. My son says he doesn't want to see him because he's scared of his dad. His father was supposed to get him this weekend, but now I can't let him go. I'm going crazy over here. I've called a psychiatrist and set up an appointment for my child, and I guess I'm going to be going from there.

    My son's father right now is on probation for assaulting his ex-girlfriend and he just got arrested for a DWI making him violate his probation so he might be going to jail. My son says his father drinks around him and smokes around him, even though doctors have said not too because he has really bad allergies. I'm scared for my son, a 7 year old should not want to kill himself, he should be happy. Would you as a mother look into getting his rights taken away? I have been married for 4 years now and my husband is willing to adopt him, but only if it's best for my son. Right now that's what I'm thinking. I just don't know what to do. Should I call a lawyer and do something or wait until he talks to the psychiatrist??

    Thanks you!
    Honestly, at this point you have nothing warranting and involuntary TPR (termination of parental rights).

    You need to take your son to the therapy session, allow your son to speak PRIVATELY with the therapist, and plan on follow up visits.

    Further, at this point, there is no legal custody order granting Dad any visitation rights (nor is there a legal child support order forcing Dad to assume any financial responsibility). You do not have to let Kiddo visit Dad, at all. However, Dad will have every right to go to court to establish custody/visitation rights (just as you have every right to ask for CS).
    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
    (unique up on him)
    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
    (same way)

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    • #3
      Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it and of course I would have him speak privately with the therapist because the reason I am sending him to one is so he has someone to talk to that isn't a parent.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Gibson06 View Post
        Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it and of course I would have him speak privately with the therapist because the reason I am sending him to one is so he has someone to talk to that isn't a parent.
        You're welcome.

        Please don't think I was implying that you were going to sit in on the therapy session to try to influence what your child would say. You would be surprised at the number of therapists that innocently (and sometimes, not so innocently as they are trying to guage exactly how much, if any, the parent is manipulating the child) invite the parent into the therapy session.
        HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
        How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
        (unique up on him)
        How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
        (same way)

        Comment


        • #5
          I understand and right now, I'm just worried about finding out the truth of everything. Thank you

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