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  • #16
    To Divorce or Not



    you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right? That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone who did just that... although not on purpose. --Brian
    your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does a
    person work? for the money.

    granted I could raise my kids pretty well (financially) if they lived in my
    house, instead I have to pay for 2 households. see my point, yet?


    Comment


    • #17
      To Divorce or Not



      you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right? That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone who did just that... although not on purpose. --Brian
      your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does a
      person work? for the money.

      granted I could raise my kids pretty well (financially) if they lived in my
      house, instead I have to pay for 2 households. see my point, yet?


      Comment


      • #18
        To Divorce or Not

        On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 06:21:55 -0500, "longshot"
        <[email protected]> wrote:
        you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right?

        That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring
        an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at
        first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone
        who did just that... although not on purpose.

        --Brian

        Comment


        • #19
          To Divorce or Not

          On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 06:21:55 -0500, "longshot"
          <[email protected]> wrote:
          you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right?

          That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring
          an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at
          first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone
          who did just that... although not on purpose.

          --Brian

          Comment


          • #20
            To Divorce or Not



            --

            Because MOST people these days share their kids and more and more (I believe the majority now) of couples get divorced without lawyers getting involved. People share the kids and the expenses. It's getting more uncommon these days for some guy to have to fork out $800 a month in child support.
            mine's more than that & frankly she couldn't survive without it, & that's a
            very modest living, anything less would fall into the "ghetto" category



            Comment


            • #21
              To Divorce or Not



              --

              Because MOST people these days share their kids and more and more (I believe the majority now) of couples get divorced without lawyers getting involved. People share the kids and the expenses. It's getting more uncommon these days for some guy to have to fork out $800 a month in child support.
              mine's more than that & frankly she couldn't survive without it, & that's a
              very modest living, anything less would fall into the "ghetto" category



              Comment


              • #22
                To Divorce or Not

                On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 07:15:10 -0500, "longshot"
                <[email protected]> wrote:
                you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right? That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone who did just that... although not on purpose. --Brian
                your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does aperson work? for the money.granted I could raise my kids pretty well (financially) if they lived in myhouse, instead I have to pay for 2 households. see my point, yet?

                Because MOST people these days share their kids and more and more (I
                believe the majority now) of couples get divorced without lawyers
                getting involved. People share the kids and the expenses. It's
                getting more uncommon these days for some guy to have to fork out $800
                a month in child support.


                Comment


                • #23
                  To Divorce or Not

                  On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 07:15:10 -0500, "longshot"
                  <[email protected]> wrote:
                  you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right? That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone who did just that... although not on purpose. --Brian
                  your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does aperson work? for the money.granted I could raise my kids pretty well (financially) if they lived in myhouse, instead I have to pay for 2 households. see my point, yet?

                  Because MOST people these days share their kids and more and more (I
                  believe the majority now) of couples get divorced without lawyers
                  getting involved. People share the kids and the expenses. It's
                  getting more uncommon these days for some guy to have to fork out $800
                  a month in child support.


                  Comment


                  • #24
                    To Divorce or Not

                    On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 07:42:06 -0500, "longshot"
                    <[email protected]> wrote:


                    If you're talking alimony, I'd do jail time before I'd pay some *****
                    to screw someone else. No way.


                    Comment


                    • #25
                      To Divorce or Not

                      On Tue, 22 Feb 2005 07:42:06 -0500, "longshot"
                      <[email protected]> wrote:


                      If you're talking alimony, I'd do jail time before I'd pay some *****
                      to screw someone else. No way.


                      Comment


                      • #26
                        To Divorce or Not

                        > If you're talking alimony, I'd do jail time before I'd pay some *****
                        to screw someone else. No way.

                        no.. there's no alimony in Indiana, it's built into the child support.
                        Basically , 2 kids means your ex get 1/3 of your income, she gets it tax
                        free based on your GROSS pay. 3 or more kids & she can get about to 1/2.
                        granted, i make considerably more than her, but mostly because I work 60 hrs
                        a week & she works 30. I am responsibly for making the kids equally
                        comfortable in both households.

                        nice huh?

                        LS





                        Comment


                        • #27
                          To Divorce or Not

                          > If you're talking alimony, I'd do jail time before I'd pay some *****
                          to screw someone else. No way.

                          no.. there's no alimony in Indiana, it's built into the child support.
                          Basically , 2 kids means your ex get 1/3 of your income, she gets it tax
                          free based on your GROSS pay. 3 or more kids & she can get about to 1/2.
                          granted, i make considerably more than her, but mostly because I work 60 hrs
                          a week & she works 30. I am responsibly for making the kids equally
                          comfortable in both households.

                          nice huh?

                          LS





                          Comment


                          • #28
                            To Divorce or Not

                            'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no
                            (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).'

                            Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for
                            those who lived together first.

                            'Now 4 years later, I've learned a great deal about who am I as a
                            person. I've gained confidence, knowledge, and a good career.
                            Unfortunately, we haven't been able to grow as a couple and share common
                            interests. I kept thinking to myself that if I gave us enough time, we
                            would gain common interests and keep re-igniting the flame. Now if
                            things keep going the way they have been, I can't see myself being with
                            her for the rest of my life.'

                            This is why its important to wait to get married. So you can grow,
                            mature, and discover yourself deeper.

                            'To top things off, we are trying to have kids. Should I end it in
                            divorce now and save our kids from having to go through it, or keep
                            holding on trying to start a family and hoping that somehow I will be
                            able to love her?'

                            I think its time to sit down with your wife and take a hard look at your
                            marriage. Then, work on it before you bring kids into the world ---
                            bringing kids into the world should NOT be done to hopefully improve the
                            marriage troubles you have currently. I would strongly urge you not to
                            have kids until your marriage is turned around and until you have given
                            it a few more years of testing.

                            M.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              To Divorce or Not

                              'Keep in mind I have a religious family so living together was a no no
                              (which now I realize would of been great to "test" each other).'

                              Actually, studies prove that there is a higher chance of divorce for
                              those who lived together first.

                              'Now 4 years later, I've learned a great deal about who am I as a
                              person. I've gained confidence, knowledge, and a good career.
                              Unfortunately, we haven't been able to grow as a couple and share common
                              interests. I kept thinking to myself that if I gave us enough time, we
                              would gain common interests and keep re-igniting the flame. Now if
                              things keep going the way they have been, I can't see myself being with
                              her for the rest of my life.'

                              This is why its important to wait to get married. So you can grow,
                              mature, and discover yourself deeper.

                              'To top things off, we are trying to have kids. Should I end it in
                              divorce now and save our kids from having to go through it, or keep
                              holding on trying to start a family and hoping that somehow I will be
                              able to love her?'

                              I think its time to sit down with your wife and take a hard look at your
                              marriage. Then, work on it before you bring kids into the world ---
                              bringing kids into the world should NOT be done to hopefully improve the
                              marriage troubles you have currently. I would strongly urge you not to
                              have kids until your marriage is turned around and until you have given
                              it a few more years of testing.

                              M.

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                To Divorce or Not


                                "longshot" <[email protected]> wrote in message
                                news:[email protected]
                                you realize that having kids will have you making the hugest possiblepayments to your future ex-wife for the next 20 years, right? That's not what you should be thinking about. But really, kids bring an amazing amount of stress to a relationship. It might seem better at first, but it will *most likely* only get worse. Take it from someone who did just that... although not on purpose. --Brian
                                your kidding right? most people spend their whole lives working.. why does a person work? for the money. granted I could raise my kids pretty well (financially) if they lived in my house, instead I have to pay for 2 households. see my point, yet?
                                Longshot, not everyone is as hyper motivated by money as you are. Some of us
                                see it merely as a means to an end.... whatever our end is.


                                Comment

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