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I'm 16 and the guy I'm interested in is 33 Maine

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  • #16
    For starters, the way my father put it is, "You make your own decisions. You **** up, that's your problem, not mine. I've washed my hands of you." You'd have to understand the way things are in my house to get it. We're a rather disfunctional family. Another note to all, I did NOT drop out of high-school thank you VERY much. My parents PULLED me out of the 3rd school I was in and threw me into a Christian home-school program. Another note, I am NOT an idiot either. All my test scores rank me at a senior in college in both intellect and comprehension skills. So,I AM in school, I'm not an idiot, and I'm doing school while working two jobs.

    Whether you think I'm an idiot or not doesn't matter, but I do know that I am more than capable of thinking and judging as an adult. After the experiences I've dealt with, which does include raising my best friends daughter after she dropped her on my porch a year ago, I am capable. If I can do high-school, college, raise a baby, and work two jobs, I think I'm more than capable of handling a relationship. I didn't come here to have people tell me their opinions of the matter. Opinions don't hold up in a court of law.

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    • #17
      Wow well then for such a "well rounded" adult-like individual such as yourself instead of asking such a question, which you'd have to have known was going to raise such a response, why don't you take all that education and intelligence and look into doing the extensive research to find the answers to your questions. I wouldn't be worried about our opinions in a court of law but rather the opinions and the thoughts of the judge when you and your gentleman friend face him in court to try and explain why there is absolutely nothing wrong with a 33 year old man wanting to be with a child. I'm sorry, but regardless of what you've accomplished in your life, how intelligent you think you are the fact that you say you've raised a baby (hate to break it to you as unfortunate as it is you're not the first 16 year old to raise a baby), the fact of the matter is that as far as the law is concerned you are a child. Any man who wants to have that type of relationship with a child should have his head examined.

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      • #18
        Originally posted by elizabeth16 View Post
        For starters, the way my father put it is, "You make your own decisions. You **** up, that's your problem, not mine. I've washed my hands of you." You'd have to understand the way things are in my house to get it. We're a rather disfunctional family. Another note to all, I did NOT drop out of high-school thank you VERY much. My parents PULLED me out of the 3rd school I was in and threw me into a Christian home-school program. Another note, I am NOT an idiot either. All my test scores rank me at a senior in college in both intellect and comprehension skills. So,I AM in school, I'm not an idiot, and I'm doing school while working two jobs.

        Whether you think I'm an idiot or not doesn't matter, but I do know that I am more than capable of thinking and judging as an adult. After the experiences I've dealt with, which does include raising my best friends daughter after she dropped her on my porch a year ago, I am capable. If I can do high-school, college, raise a baby, and work two jobs, I think I'm more than capable of handling a relationship. I didn't come here to have people tell me their opinions of the matter. Opinions don't hold up in a court of law.
        Wow. How refreshing. A teen ager that thinks they are more mature than most teen agers. That's new.

        You are being used by a pedophile. If you have given him the opportunity to rape you (even if you threw off your clothes and BEGGED him to do it to you), he is going to prison.

        Your opinion of your situation doesn't matter to a court of law at all. None. The LEGAL opinions that you have been given here are not just moralistic arguments... they are the law.

        You don't get to change them because you stomp your foot and really really want to.

        And I called you an idiot because every single 16 year old in the world with a crush is an idiot. I was one. Every adult on here was one. You are one.

        Part of the growing up process.

        Now, stop throwing yourself at grownups. You are going to leave behind a trail of convicts.
        Not everything that makes you mad, sad or uncomfortable is legally actionable.

        I am not now nor ever was an attorney.

        Any statements I make are based purely upon my personal experiences and research which may or may not be accurate in a court of law.

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        • #19
          Okay, for starters, I didn't throw myself at him. I held open a door for him. He came back to get my name and this was WELL before either of us knew the others age. I don't expect to be able to stomp my foot and have something happen. You make me sound like a two-year old, but I do think that if I work hard enough on something and if he thinks he can be my friend for two years than maybe all the effort I put into it wouldn't be wasted. It doesn't matter anyhow. This was a ridiculous idea thinking that perhaps I could get unbiased opinions. And the last thought I'll leave on here, I'm not a child. Perhaps in age....but far from it in physical and mental state. It's understandable that he thought I was older, I get mistaken for being around 23-25 all the time.

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          • #20
            Originally posted by elizabeth16 View Post
            I'm not a child. Perhaps in age....but far from it in physical and mental state. It's understandable that he thought I was older, I get mistaken for being around 23-25 all the time.

            Sweetie, every teenager thinks they are more mature than their chronological age. Very few of them are and those kinds of statements tend to show immarturity, rather than maturity.
            Sorry, no one wants to rain on your parade. Most of us here were deeply "in love" as teenagers. But wisdom and experience taught us that what we were experienceing at that time bears little resemblence to long term sustaining love.
            So many young girls come to this board and are convinced they are in love and no one understands that this love is "different". We may not tell you what you want to hear but people are giving you good information. Take it, think about it and if you are as mature as you say, you'll make some choices that reflect that maturity and realize that 33 year old men are not looking for a long term relationship from a 16 year old.
            I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.
            Thomas Jefferson

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            • #21
              There is no reason, no reason at all, for a 33 year old man to find a 16 year old woman sexually attractive.

              None.

              There is no reason, no reason at all, for a 26 year old man to find a 16 year old woman sexually attractive.

              None.

              You have NOTHING in common. Sure, you may both enjoy a type of music or something... but what else? You have so much growing to do...

              You telling me that you are mature would be akin to you telling me about nuclear fission. You don't even know enough about the subject to tell me what you don't know about the subject.

              Give yourself time to be a kid. There will be plenty of time to be an adult later.

              In the meantime, if you can't handle honest critiques of your relationship, than maybe that should tell you something.... because if you think WE are harsh, wait until the rest of the world sees you two out and about.

              "Yes sir. And what will your daughter have?"
              "Sorry, she is not old enough to come into our place of business after 9 pm."
              "Sorry, when she was found to be pregnant, we had to call the authorities on her adult boyfriend."
              Not everything that makes you mad, sad or uncomfortable is legally actionable.

              I am not now nor ever was an attorney.

              Any statements I make are based purely upon my personal experiences and research which may or may not be accurate in a court of law.

              Comment


              • #22
                Originally posted by cyjeff View Post
                "Yes sir. And what will your daughter have?"
                "Sorry, she is not old enough to come into our place of business after 9 pm."
                "Sorry, when she was found to be pregnant, we had to call the authorities on her adult boyfriend."
                "In Count 1 of the indictment - Statutory Rape, how do you plead?"
                My opinions are just that and are not to be taken as legal advice.

                Responses are based on life experience, personal research, and/or knowledge gained from the experts here.

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                • #23
                  Originally posted by Morgana View Post
                  Sweetie, every teenager thinks they are more mature than their chronological age. Very few of them are and those kinds of statements tend to show immarturity, rather than maturity.
                  Sorry, no one wants to rain on your parade. Most of us here were deeply "in love" as teenagers. But wisdom and experience taught us that what we were experienceing at that time bears little resemblence to long term sustaining love.
                  So many young girls come to this board and are convinced they are in love and no one understands that this love is "different". We may not tell you what you want to hear but people are giving you good information. Take it, think about it and if you are as mature as you say, you'll make some choices that reflect that maturity and realize that 33 year old men are not looking for a long term relationship from a 16 year old.

                  I know...but it's one of those decisions that you know you have to make but it's one you really don't want to and when you do you wish you could take it back so badly. I talked to him last night...I know everything everyone on here is saying is true...I fought it cause I didn't want to tell him that we shouldn't be together...but I know it had to be that way. I understand love...I see it in my parents...they love each other very much...I don't love Phil...nothing near it...but he's very intriguing. We talk of religion and things. It's strange, cause I didn't realize I was so fond of the man, but it tears me up to know that I won't see him or talk to him anymore unless he stops by my work. I just wish that guys my age were capable of holding intelligent conversations with me the way he does. I don't care about physical aspects of relationships...that's not a necessity, or even something that should be considered right now seeings how I'm already raising someone elses kid I don't need one of my own, but what I really look for is someone I can talk to intelligently. That can just sit beside me and talk and not be spewing bull**** trying to cover that he doesn't know what he's talking about. I mean, I'm not saying that I would rather never be held or anything of that sort, but I hate it when everything the guy does revolves around one thing and one thing only. Why can't they use the head on their shoulders? *sighs* You guys are correct...thank you.

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                  • #24
                    You will have to trust us on this one.

                    I have been 16, 26 and 33. You have not.

                    You will just have to accept that we may know what we are talking about.

                    Adults that want to molest children make those children feel special... smarter... more mature... even as adults.

                    This is part of the trap. They feed into what you have always wanted someone to say, "you really are so much more mature than other kids your age. I would have thought you were in your twenties. Normally I wouldn't even consider a relationship with a kid your age, but, given your maturity, age is just a number... right?"

                    Followed closely by, "We don't need physical means to be together, right?"

                    Followed closely by, "I so wish I could just TOUCH you. I keep forgetting that you are a child. You are so mature for your age. What do you think?"

                    Followed closely by, "I want to prove how much I love you. I want to prove my love the way people have done since the dawn of time. If children in Shakespeare's time were old enough, why should we let a bunch of old, fat, white men tell us how to love?"

                    Sing along if you know the words.

                    This type of conversation is right out of the "how to sexually molest children and have them think they love you" handbook.

                    You are being played. You just didn't even know there was a game.
                    Last edited by cyjeff; 05-21-2008, 11:44 AM.
                    Not everything that makes you mad, sad or uncomfortable is legally actionable.

                    I am not now nor ever was an attorney.

                    Any statements I make are based purely upon my personal experiences and research which may or may not be accurate in a court of law.

                    Comment

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