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His new G/F is protraying herself to be "Mom" Alabama

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  • His new G/F is protraying herself to be "Mom" Alabama

    Ok, I have posted on a couple other furoms and I just want to make sure that I am getting all the advice I can.

    Loooong story short...

    My EH and I have 2 children. We have joint custody. I am remarried and EH now has GF. The GF has without my knowledge or consent, enrolled our son in a special school. The GF took our daughter to the dr, again without my knowledge.

    When I asked my EH about these things, he refuses to talk to me about it. I had to take my custody papers to the school and drs and everywhere. I got copies of docs that the GF signed stating that she is the mother of the children.

    I was not listed at all on any documents and in fact was given the 'cold shoulder' by some staff just before producing my ID and custody papers. Then it was all "yes, ma'am".

    The police won't do anything! I thought it was against the law to falsify legal documents. I also was under the impression that step-parents, much less GF's have no legal rights to a minor child, unles otherwise adopted or so ordered by a court of law. EH says his attrny says these actions are ok b/s EH gave GF premission to do so.

    There is more to the story, such as GF keeping me from picking up the children on my visitation times. Her disciplining the children by putting their hand in poo. EH's need to surround himself and our children with drug addicts, alcoholics, and under age girls that are of no relation to him. EH allowing the children to call GF (of only 6 months), "Mommy".

    The list goes on, but what do I do about her acting as mommy and him letting her? Is there anything I can do, or someone I can call while I am waiting to see if the judge will even hear my case? What can I do to keep it focused on the children's best interests and keep it from getting catty?

    The last thing I want is to become the 'baby momma' statistic. I am so worried about what this is doing to the children. My new husband and I try our very best to encourage a loving relationship with the children and their dad. We even tell them it's ok to like/love the GF and that they should respect her regardless. My husband and I do not talk about EH or GF even within ear shot of the children. I have never once said that EH was a 'bad dad', I do not 'talk about' them. I have only stated the facts and actions that I have seen or been told about by my children. Even then, I have only talked to a select few about any of this. (other than a couple forums, which don't ask for names)

    The children go through enough, they don't need any more drama, but I am not so sure that they are getting the same concern when they are with EH. When I call them at their dad's, GF is always in background and the phone is ALWAYS put on speaker.
    What are my options?

  • #2
    Court. That is your option.

    Call your attorney and take EH to court and have the judge make who is Mommy and who is Daddy very clear to everyone.

    Oh, and if the kids call your new husband "Dad", you will have a much harder row to hoe.
    Not everything that makes you mad, sad or uncomfortable is legally actionable.

    I am not now nor ever was an attorney.

    Any statements I make are based purely upon my personal experiences and research which may or may not be accurate in a court of law.


    • #3
      I am going to court. I just thought that there may be something that I could do until then. Guess not.

      No, my children DO NOT call my husband "dad", "daddy", or anything of that nature. They refer to him by his name. If his name were 'Joe', they would call him, 'Joe'. They do not refer to him even as, 'Daddy Joe'. It's 'Mommy and Joe'. That's it.

      In fact, the day we got married, my daughter asked me if she could call my husband "daddy", and we told her no, that she already has a daddy and that EH would be the only daddy that she would ever have.

      She then replied," oh ok." and the subject has never been brought up since.

      My husband loves my children and wouldn't think of treating them any different than he treats the child we have together. However, when it comes to my children with EH, my new husband knows his bounderies and knows that he has no rights at all. When things don't go the way we would like with EH and GF, my new husband keeps out of it. He supports me and the children emotionally and helps us make the right choice but otherwise keeps his nose out of it.

      I grew up in a home with a step father and even though my father wasn't in the picture, I never once called my step father, "dad". Now that I am an adult and my step father has been in my life for over 20 years, I do refer to him when talking to other people as my 'dad'. But I call him by his name. My mother made sure that I knew that I had a father and that I could love whom ever I wanted. I teach my children the same.

      Can't say the same about the others involved.

      I am well aware of the parental roles that we as 'legal' parents are to play.