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  • Please Help!

    To make a long story as short as possible here goes.

    I have a friend from Arizona who had a pretty rough childhood. When her father passed away when she was 16 years old she ran away from home and turned to drugs. She ran away with a 54 year old man who i believe she felt was possibly a father figure to her at that time and someone she could turn to for advice. Anyway, he moved her to Michigan where she became pregnant by him at 17 years old. Her son is now 20 months old. She has since left this man but he has now filed her with custody papers wanting to take away their son.
    I believe that she was taken advantage of by this man. When i think about it, i believe he moved her to Michigan because the age of consent in AZ is 18 whereas in Michigan it's 16.
    Do you think this man has a case against my friend? She is very scared that she may lose her son but i on the other hand think any court would be crazy to give custody to a 54 year old man that slept with a 16 year old girl.

    Any help would be appreciated.
    Thanks so much!
    Last edited by nightqueen85; 04-17-2006, 01:29 PM.

  • #2
    Originally posted by nightqueen85
    To make a long story as short as possible here goes.

    I have a friend from Arizona who had a pretty rough childhood. When her father passed away when she was 16 years old she ran away from home and turned to drugs. She ran away with a 54 year old man who i believe she felt was possibly a father figure to her. Anyway, he moved her to Michigan where she became pregnant by him at 17 years old. Her son is now 20 months old. She has since left this man but he has now filed her with custody papers wanting to take away their son.
    I believe that she was taken advantage of by this man. When i think about it, i believe he moved her to Michigan because the age of consent in AZ is 18 whereas in Michigan it's 16.
    Do you think this man has a case against my friend?

    Any help would be appreciated.
    Thanks so much!
    Well, since he will be opening himself up to criminal charges, this would be a very stupid issue to bring to the court's attention. Just because the age of consent in MI is 16, that does not mean that it is legal for a 54 year old man to have sex with a 16 year old girl. Not to mention, transporting a minor over state lines, kidnapping, harboring a runaway, contributing to the delinquency and/or corruption of a minor, and on and on and on. If he was having sex with her before they moved from AZ, he could be facing rape charges, or at the least, indecency with a minor.

    Where is she now? Is she clean, have a stable environment for her child, a job? Has she filed for cs?
    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
    (unique up on him)
    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
    (same way)

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    • #3
      Ok, the next part of the story then. She went to Canada in Nov 2005 (she took her son) and stayed there for about 4 months. She really wants to move to Canada but in order to do so she needed to get an affidavit signed by the father to allow her to bring her son to Canada. So she went back to Arizona (where she is now) and this is when the father served her the papers.
      While she was in Canada they were speaking and he pretty much told her he was ok with her leaving but didn't want it to be to another country.
      Right now she is living with her parents and yes she is working. She has been off drugs for over 2 years now. She has a very strong support in Canada (a fiance with a great job, house, stable environment) in Arizona she lives in a trailer with her parents.
      Do you think the courts would let her take her son to Canada?
      She has not filed anything against this man. She just recieved the expedited papers from him last week with a hearing date of May 1, 2006.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by nightqueen85
        Ok, the next part of the story then. She went to Canada in Nov 2005 (she took her son) and stayed there for about 4 months. She really wants to move to Canada but in order to do so she needed to get an affidavit signed by the father to allow her to bring her son to Canada. So she went back to Arizona (where she is now) and this is when the father served her the papers.
        While she was in Canada they were speaking and he pretty much told her he was ok with her leaving but didn't want it to be to another country.
        Right now she is living with her parents and yes she is working. She has been off drugs for over 2 years now. She has a very strong support in Canada (a fiance with a great job, house, stable environment) in Arizona she lives in a trailer with her parents.
        Do you think the courts would let her take her son to Canada?
        She has not filed anything against this man. She just recieved the expedited papers from him last week with a hearing date of May 1, 2006.
        I don't know what the courts would allow as far as moving to another country. If I were her, I would let the father know that she and her family are prepared to file any and all charges that may apply against him, along with an order for support. Maybe that will make him think twice.
        HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
        How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
        (unique up on him)
        How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
        (same way)

        Comment


        • #5
          From wikipedia:

          Federal US law forbids crossing state lines or international borders with a person who is under 18 (in an attempt to escape the state's AOC or without permission from the minor's legal guardian).

          This is the crux of the case, IMO. The 54 year old man clearly violated the law by moving the girl to Michigan (unless, of course, he had the written permission of her legal guardian). The man should be prosecuted for his sexual acts with a minor, more-so for not taking sufficient precautions to prevent a pregnancy. He is hardly in a position to protest for custody, and I'm amazed he would be stupid enough to file papers proving his misdeeds.

          I'm assuming your friend is now at least 18 - I would try to get this matter settled with the father (read that...get him thrown in jail), and have her move on with her life. I would be concerned about having a "fiance" resulting from a 4-month visit to Canada. Did she meet him before, and was just visiting him there? Your friend needs to be extremely careful about jumping into another relationship...if he is the great guy she says he is, he will wait for the situation to resolve itself.

          I hope your friend is able to work this out - hopefully she has a family now that she can turn to for support in this difficult time. Best of luck to her and to you...you're a good friend for trying to help!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by boobatuba
            From wikipedia:


            I'm assuming your friend is now at least 18 - I would try to get this matter settled with the father (read that...get him thrown in jail), and have her move on with her life. I would be concerned about having a "fiance" resulting from a 4-month visit to Canada. Did she meet him before, and was just visiting him there? Your friend needs to be extremely careful about jumping into another relationship...if he is the great guy she says he is, he will wait for the situation to resolve itself.

            I hope your friend is able to work this out - hopefully she has a family now that she can turn to for support in this difficult time. Best of luck to her and to you...you're a good friend for trying to help!
            First of all, this man did not have consent from her parents to take her to Michigan. Her parents actually hired a detective to look for her while she was missing. She did return to AZ after about 6 months.

            I totally agree about this man, i can't believe he would file for custody after what he has done to her.
            Yes my friend is actually 19 now. She originally met this man from Canada on-line in July of 2005. They spoke online and on the phone for about 6 months when she decided to go visit him in Canada and see if they could make a relationship work. While she was there she fell in love with this guy who by the way is 26. He is flying to AZ for the court hearing and to support her. He gave her a small ring, they are calling it a promise/engagement ring. I was thinking that they may have a stronger case in court if they were engaged but maybe not?? He is also willing to adopt her son. He is in no hurry to marry her, he would wait as long as he has to i'm sure.

            I can attest that they would have a much better life in Canada then they would have in AZ but i don't know if the courts would see it that way as they may still want to allow the birth father visitation if she is granted custody?

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by nightqueen85
              First of all, this man did not have consent from her parents to take her to Michigan. Her parents actually hired a detective to look for her while she was missing. She did return to AZ after about 6 months.

              I totally agree about this man, i can't believe he would file for custody after what he has done to her.
              Yes my friend is actually 19 now. She originally met this man from Canada on-line in July of 2005. They spoke online and on the phone for about 6 months when she decided to go visit him in Canada and see if they could make a relationship work. While she was there she fell in love with this guy who by the way is 26. He is flying to AZ for the court hearing and to support her. He gave her a small ring, they are calling it a promise/engagement ring. I was thinking that they may have a stronger case in court if they were engaged but maybe not?? He is also willing to adopt her son. He is in no hurry to marry her, he would wait as long as he has to i'm sure.

              I can attest that they would have a much better life in Canada then they would have in AZ but i don't know if the courts would see it that way as they may still want to allow the birth father visitation if she is granted custody?
              Well, if his sorry butt is in jail, it will be hard to be granted visitation rights. She definitely needs to persue charges against this pedophile and (technically) kidnapper. I hope it works out for her.
              HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
              How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
              (unique up on him)
              How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
              (same way)

              Comment


              • #8
                One more question then.
                Could she still file charges against him even though this happened over 2 years ago?
                I mean will the courts penalize her for not doing it sooner?
                Also do you think if she went to the police now that they may help her?

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by nightqueen85
                  One more question then.
                  Could she still file charges against him even though this happened over 2 years ago?
                  I mean will the courts penalize her for not doing it sooner?
                  Also do you think if she went to the police now that they may help her?
                  Yes, she can file a report with the police now. No, she will not face penalties for not reporting sooner, though why her parents did not file charges when they found her, I couldn't imagine. The police are obligated to look into a situation if there is a reasonable expectation that a crime has been committed. Look at it this way, if he did it to one child, it will be easier for him to justify to himself that he can do it again.
                  HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                  How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                  (unique up on him)
                  How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                  (same way)

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I dont see a child molester getting visitation of any child! Just my 2 cents!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I totally agree with mommyof4...please tell her to go see the police ASAP...charges need to be filed against this older man (there may be a limitation on the time you can file charges).

                      The courts would most certainly NOT penalize her for not filing charges sooner - she was a minor and not expected to realize the illegality of his actions. This is part of the problem with these predators - they prey on the naivete of their victims.

                      She doesn't need a lawyer - tell her to go speak with a police investigator NOW.

                      And thanks for the update on the guy from Canada...I would still advise caution, though...no need to get in a hurry and rush off to Canada.

                      Best of luck!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I will do that right away. Thanks for all the help everyone.

                        Another thing do you know, when you serve someone custody papers you make accusations towards them as to why you feel they are an unfit parent do you have to provide proof of the things you're accusing them of?

                        The reason for this question is that he is accusing her of a bunch of stuff that never happened...they're all lies.

                        On the papers she recieved he even lied about her age....making her 1 year older then she really is.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          [QUOTE=nightqueen85]I will do that right away. Thanks for all the help everyone.

                          Another thing do you know, when you serve someone custody papers you make accusations towards them as to why you feel they are an unfit parent do you have to provide proof of the things you're accusing them of?

                          The reason for this question is that he is accusing her of a bunch of stuff that never happened...they're all lies.

                          On the papers she recieved he even lied about her age....making her 1 year older then she really is.[/Q]

                          yes, otherwise I could have gone into court claiming that my ex was a raving lunatic that liked to make out with sheep in front of our daughter, all in the name of satanic rituals.



                          Yes, he will have to have proof. But, alas, he can make those claims from a jail cell and see how quick the judge agrees with him.
                          HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                          How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                          (unique up on him)
                          How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                          (same way)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Do you think it is a strong possibility that he would face jail time if she charged him?
                            Last edited by nightqueen85; 04-17-2006, 08:08 PM.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by nightqueen85
                              Do you think it is a strong possibility that he would face jail time if she charged him?
                              You betcha'. Even if he doesn't, it will probably put the breaks on his trying to get custody and/or visitation. Can you imagine the reaction from the public once this gets out?

                              By the way, SHE can't charge him. She can (and should) file a report with the police, but the state actually presses charges.
                              HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                              How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                              (unique up on him)
                              How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                              (same way)

                              Comment

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