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What can we do about the mother's false promises? Arkansas

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  • What can we do about the mother's false promises? Arkansas

    My husband and I went for custody of his 2 children earlier this year. unfortunately we had a horrid lawyer that was about to make judge and was doing anything to get rid of his small cases...meaning us. Long story short we ended up settling for something we never wanted and it costs us A LOT of money to do so. After the papers were finalized it came down to 3 times a year visitation (we live in different states) and paying $250 a month in child support but covering all travel costs. We talked to her and told her that we didn't like the idea of lowering the child support and we had no problems paying the full and driving to meet like we had always done. We told her that IF we chose to fly the kids (which she resisted at first) we would cover all costs. She agreed to everything, we have been paying her the normal amount of 620 a month and for the summer we met in our usual meeting point which is half way (17 hours for both parties) but now we are coming up on getting them for Thanksgiving and we tell her we want to drive to meet. she says no, buy them plane tickets. We told her that it was only when we wouldn't drive we would cover the cost. we convinced her to pay for one ticket (we covered chaperone fees for both) for this trip. She then turns around and says that she wants them to fly every time now and she will cover half of 2 trips but not the third. We told her if we wanted to do that we would have stuck to the original agreement. we told her to choose either pay for half on all trips or drive, or go back to whats in the papers. We hadn't had the papers changed yet because we have to find a new lawyer and things are tight right now plus I'm currently deployed making things harder. We did the math for her and showed her that even with her paying half on travel she gets over 3k more a year than with the $250 a month. I have her agreeing to all of this in texts and emails.

    My question is, she lied to us, made false promises to "extort" more money out of us. Then when it didn't go her way she changed the deal. Can we sue her for cheating us out of that extra money. The only reason we gave it to her is because she said she would do her part but she isn't anymore. Or since we already paid her that much, can we stop paying until its caught up. If we meet the yearly balance even though it says pay this monthly. Or does this evil woman win again? She is always using the children to get things out of us and use us, she does it with everyone. She relies on everyone but herself to pay for her and her children. We could really use some advice while we are in between lawyers. She refuses to pick an option because we won't bow to her stipulations. So we need to take action before we lose even more money to her. (and we would gladly give the kids anything but this woman isn't using this money for our kids, she has 4 others to other men and lavish items she can't afford) usually when the kids require something outside of the stated child support, we send the actual items so we know that is what it is going for...they are taken care of by us. We are not trying to get out of our obligations, we have more than proved that, she is just trying to use us all she can.

  • #2
    Originally posted by stepmom22 View Post
    My husband and I went for custody of his 2 children earlier this year. unfortunately we had a horrid lawyer that was about to make judge and was doing anything to get rid of his small cases...meaning us.

    Why did your husband go for custody? (You didn't - you're a legal stranger in this and you need to remember that).

    Long story short we ended up settling for something we never wanted and it costs us A LOT of money to do so. After the papers were finalized it came down to 3 times a year visitation (we live in different states) and paying $250 a month in child support but covering all travel costs.

    In other words he had no chance of being the CP to begin with.

    We talked to her and told her that we didn't like the idea of lowering the child support and we had no problems paying the full and driving to meet like we had always done. We told her that IF we chose to fly the kids (which she resisted at first) we would cover all costs.

    Where in the court orders does it say that your husband (again, not YOU at all) gets to decide the mode of transportation?

    She agreed to everything, we have been paying her the normal amount of 620 a month and for the summer we met in our usual meeting point which is half way (17 hours for both parties) but now we are coming up on getting them for Thanksgiving and we tell her we want to drive to meet. she says no, buy them plane tickets. We told her that it was only when we wouldn't drive we would cover the cost. we convinced her to pay for one ticket (we covered chaperone fees for both) for this trip. She then turns around and says that she wants them to fly every time now and she will cover half of 2 trips but not the third. We told her if we wanted to do that we would have stuck to the original agreement. we told her to choose either pay for half on all trips or drive, or go back to whats in the papers. We hadn't had the papers changed yet because we have to find a new lawyer and things are tight right now plus I'm currently deployed making things harder. We did the math for her and showed her that even with her paying half on travel she gets over 3k more a year than with the $250 a month. I have her agreeing to all of this in texts and emails.

    Oh boy...


    My question is, she lied to us, made false promises to "extort" more money out of us.

    Nothing you have said here comes even close to extortion.

    Then when it didn't go her way she changed the deal.

    Please type WORD FOR WORD (minus names) what the ACTUAL court order says about transportation.

    Can we sue her for cheating us out of that extra money.
    According to you, your husband agreed to be responsible for transportation costs. Please explain why Mom is the bad guy here?

    The only reason we gave it to her is because she said she would do her part but she isn't anymore. Or since we already paid her that much, can we stop paying until its caught up.

    No.

    If we meet the yearly balance even though it says pay this monthly. Or does this evil woman win again? She is always using the children to get things out of us and use us, she does it with everyone. She relies on everyone but herself to pay for her and her children. We could really use some advice while we are in between lawyers. She refuses to pick an option because we won't bow to her stipulations. So we need to take action before we lose even more money to her. (and we would gladly give the kids anything but this woman isn't using this money for our kids, she has 4 others to other men and lavish items she can't afford) usually when the kids require something outside of the stated child support, we send the actual items so we know that is what it is going for...they are taken care of by us. We are not trying to get out of our obligations, we have more than proved that, she is just trying to use us all she can.

    Are you actually Mom posting to gauge how people will react to a Dad and overstepping (by FAR) stepmom?

    If not, Stepmommy, I fear you're in for a very harsh reality check (unless you've made some errors in typing - and I do understand that. Specially when one is deployed).

    Now where is Dad? And could you please not diss on her so much? Remember, your husband CHOSE her. Y'know?

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    • #3
      Wow last time I come anywhere for advice. First of all you are one of the most rude people I have ever met and I can see you are probably a mother that got screwed over or took a man that was trying to do his part but you just kept wanting more too. Believe me I know I don't have any right but my husband and I are a team. so yes I use the words WE. WE talk about all this, WE do the research, WE love those children. We went for custody on grounds that she was living/sleeping with a man with the children. co-habitation. She started dating him 10 days after she had another mans baby and then moved in with him a whopping week later. Im so sorry I ever came here to talk to anyone, and believe me don't bother with a response because I won't be back. This place apparently is nothing but man hating *******s. Your probably just like her. a lying *****.

      Comment


      • #4
        What a class act. So your profanity is better for the child than a living situation you don't approve of?

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