Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

stepparent rights Tennessee

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • stepparent rights Tennessee

    first off, kelly your answers are not welcome- we all know how you feel about steps.
    my hubby has "sole custody, control, and care" of his daughter. mom has supervised visits only- which she has excercised 5 times in the past 9 years. we have not heard a peep from her in 14 months.
    now, i am on all the paperwork at the Dr, school, etc as the main contact for the child- signed by my husband, as it is much easier to get hold of me and I am much closer and the one who does these things mainly
    on another board, it was said that if mom decided to show up and throw a fit that the school, Dr, etc would not be able to talk to me anymore. I just want to know if this is correct. Again, my husband has SOLE legal and physical custody

  • #2
    Originally posted by milspecgirl View Post
    first off, kelly your answers are not welcome- we all know how you feel about steps.
    my hubby has "sole custody, control, and care" of his daughter. mom has supervised visits only- which she has excercised 5 times in the past 9 years. we have not heard a peep from her in 14 months.
    now, i am on all the paperwork at the Dr, school, etc as the main contact for the child- signed by my husband, as it is much easier to get hold of me and I am much closer and the one who does these things mainly
    on another board, it was said that if mom decided to show up and throw a fit that the school, Dr, etc would not be able to talk to me anymore. I just want to know if this is correct. Again, my husband has SOLE legal and physical custody
    She'd have to have a good reason for the fit... The truth is that you (and my husband currently) have no more rights than any caregiver that is not the legal parent. If I have on all of my son's paperwork that my neighbor is to pick him up and watch him after school and be a contact for information, the other parent would need to have a reason to not allow such an arrangement to continue and that is basically how step-parents are as well. Since the mother (same as my ex) only has supervised visitation rights, there is obviously an issue with their being alone with the child, so the Dr, School or whomever else could get into major trouble releasing the child (and possibly information) to her. She CAN go to court and petition to not allow things to continue the way they are, but with her supervised visitation, it's doubtful they would do anything about it.

    With Sole legal and physical custody, your husband gets to say who your child talks to and stays with. There are a lot of people who will say a step-parent has no rights, but that is not the whole story. My husband gets whatever rights I give him because I have sole legal and physical custody as well. If I say that he has every right to talk to the school, then he does.

    Comment


    • #3
      I have already been through all that. My husband has full custody of his son, and mother has standard visitation. I am on all school paperwork as mom. Well, mom got irate, and went to the school. Turns out, since none of her visitation falls during school hours, she has no rights to pick him up or even see him at school. The only thing the school can do for her is give her his school records. I can even sign any paperwork pertaining to him. As long as your husband gives you that responsibility, the courts or the school should not have any problems with it.

      Comment


      • #4
        Just another question on stepparent rights or lack of. My husband has temporary custody of his children (for over a year). Mom was not given any visitation and has not filed for any.

        Now for the question, I have Power of Attorney for my husband. Does that allow and protect me when making any decisions concerning the children as well? I am listed on all of their documents (school, doctor, activities, etc)?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by MissingStepkids View Post
          Just another question on stepparent rights or lack of. My husband has temporary custody of his children (for over a year). Mom was not given any visitation and has not filed for any.

          Now for the question, I have Power of Attorney for my husband. Does that allow and protect me when making any decisions concerning the children as well? I am listed on all of their documents (school, doctor, activities, etc)?
          No. Not even close.
          Please no private messages about your situation.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by notjustastepmom View Post
            I have already been through all that. My husband has full custody of his son, and mother has standard visitation. I am on all school paperwork as mom. Well, mom got irate, and went to the school. Turns out, since none of her visitation falls during school hours, she has no rights to pick him up or even see him at school. The only thing the school can do for her is give her his school records. I can even sign any paperwork pertaining to him. As long as your husband gives you that responsibility, the courts or the school should not have any problems with it.
            the school may not think she has that right, but I doubt they would actually stop her from picking kiddo up- there is a line in this mess, and parents rights are constitutionally protected.....

            not saying that your sitch is anything other than what you present- just don't want newbies coming through this thread and really screwing things up in their own situations
            http://www.gestaltmediation.com/

            Comment


            • #7
              EXCELLENT POINT- normally you cannot stop the parent. In our case- mother's visitation must be supervised. We took all papers on the first day of school and explained that she was not to leave with anyone but those on her list- that her mother is on supervised because she refuses training for her medical condition and that allowing her to leave with her could result in the child becoming deathly ill. the school agreed to call us and wait for us to get there before releasing her if mom tries it. it helps that child wants nothing to do with mother and would refuse to leave with her.

              Comment


              • #8
                EXCELLENT POINT- normally you cannot stop the parent. In our case- mother's visitation must be supervised. We took all papers on the first day of school and explained that she was not to leave with anyone but those on her list- that her mother is on supervised because she refuses training for her medical condition and that allowing her to leave with her could result in the child becoming deathly ill. the school agreed to call us and wait for us to get there before releasing her if mom tries it. it helps that child wants nothing to do with mother and would refuse to leave with her.

                Comment


                • #9
                  wow- how did i manage to double post- sorry

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Supervised Visitation is very different from regular visitation. Parents that have regular visitation would never be denied being able to see their child, arrange for parent/teacher meetings, or demand that they be listed as the proper biological parent on the child's school paperwork.

                    There would still need to be a valid reason for not allowing the school to speak to someone the other parent requested that they speak to however. It's our responsibility to see that the child is properly cared for during the time the other parent does not have visitation or does not exercise visitation and they only have a say if the child's health and well-being are in jeopardy.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Not trying to screw things up. Just giving personal experience! My husband was told by an attorney, that ex could not pick up child from school, since she does not have visitation during school hrs. He talked to the school, and they told him they would call the police if she tried. All he needed was the custody papers that outlined custody and visitation, and that is kept on file at the school.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I'm not saying that I don't believe what you are saying, but I think you should seek the advice of a different attorney.

                        I mean, say maternal Grandmother (just as an example here) were to have a serious accident, and Mom wants to come take the kid to the hospital before the G-ma dies. So she goes to school to pick kiddo up. I cannot believe that the police would be called. I can see them calling Dad, but the cops?

                        I mean, it's her child. I can understand calling Dad, but the cops? Come on, now. There MUST be way more to the situation that such a drastic measure would be taken.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          More.....

                          I mean, what exactly would the police be expected to do? Charge her? With what?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by notjustastepmom View Post
                            Not trying to screw things up. Just giving personal experience! My husband was told by an attorney, that ex could not pick up child from school, since she does not have visitation during school hrs. He talked to the school, and they told him they would call the police if she tried. All he needed was the custody papers that outlined custody and visitation, and that is kept on file at the school.
                            Unless the custody order expressly PROHIBITS/RESTRAINS Mom from picking up HER child ,then the school couldn't prevent her from doing so...At least without risking a law suit!

                            I agree with the others ...Get a new attorney!
                            Please Note: My "warm and fuzzy" font is not working, therefor my posts will be direct and to the point.

                            Thank you in advance for your anticipated understanding.

                            Bay

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Notjust...

                              I can personally attest to the validity of MoB's and Baystate's comments.

                              It took 4 years and a lot of hell to get it, but if I didn't have the specific restrictions in my order that I do, there is nothing a school could LEGALLY do to keep him away from my child. (Yep, went through that before I had the final order.)

                              The school may be willing to work with you, but they are putting themselves in a legally precarious position.
                              HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                              How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                              (unique up on him)
                              How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                              (same way)

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X