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visitation non-custodial parent - New York

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  • visitation non-custodial parent - New York

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    My childrens' father recently got back in touch with us after almost 3 yrs. We had some domestic vio issues and he stayed away. To make a very long story short, he has made his decision to be back in their lives again. We've been able to speak as civilized parents and I've let him meet the girls at his aunts house. He also speaks to them via telephone after school and b4 bed.

    Here's where it gets cloudy... He'd like to take them out on his own to the movies and possibly shopping which would be nice. His aunt (she's no lawyer) suggested that I notorize a letter stating he has permission, on whatever days we agree on, to take them during those days. I don't believe that holds any weight in case something goes down, but i'm no lawyer either.

    Can someone give me some good advice on how to address this situation? I mean going to court seems like the best solution to me but I don't know if I can go through all of that again.

  • #2
    Originally posted by MsCase View Post
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    My childrens' father recently got back in touch with us after almost 3 yrs. We had some domestic vio issues and he stayed away. To make a very long story short, he has made his decision to be back in their lives again. We've been able to speak as civilized parents and I've let him meet the girls at his aunts house. He also speaks to them via telephone after school and b4 bed.

    Here's where it gets cloudy... He'd like to take them out on his own to the movies and possibly shopping which would be nice. His aunt (she's no lawyer) suggested that I notorize a letter stating he has permission, on whatever days we agree on, to take them during those days. I don't believe that holds any weight in case something goes down, but i'm no lawyer either.

    Can someone give me some good advice on how to address this situation? I mean going to court seems like the best solution to me but I don't know if I can go through all of that again.
    What does the most recent custody/visitation court order say?

    Is there an existing restraining order prohibiting him from having contact with the kids?

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    • #3
      No there are no custody/visitation orders. Nor any current restraining orders against him seeing the kids.

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      • #4
        Until there is a court order, you are under no legal obligation to allow any contact with the children (although, since you already ARE allowing visitation, it would be cruel, not only to him, but the children, to just cut that off). A signed notarized letter is only worth the paper it is written on. I suggest you get a custod/visitation order in place. If you are both in agreement on the terms of visitation, it should be a pretty simple thing to do.
        HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
        How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
        (unique up on him)
        How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
        (same way)

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        • #5
          Yes I would advise you to go to court and get something in writting.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by MsCase View Post
            No there are no custody/visitation orders. Nor any current restraining orders against him seeing the kids.
            You really need to go to court to get custody and visitation in an enforceable court order. Also, it will establish legal paternity if that hasn't been established yet.

            A notorized letter might not do much good, but at least it can't hurt. It would be a good idea tho to give him a number where you can be reached at all times in case of an emergency until you get into court.

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