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leaving bf custody issues Maryland

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  • leaving bf custody issues Maryland

    i am planning on leaving my boyfriend. he is the father of my daughter. we have the lease for the apartment in both names and the loan for the car is in both names but is is only registered in my name. i am the one physically paying for the car.
    the problem is i am afraid he will take my daughter away out of state and try something crazy if i tell him i am leaving.
    what ways can i assure our safety legally ?
    can i take the car ?
    i want to file for sole custody , how quickly can that be done in an emergency situation?
    any help is appreciated.

  • #2
    You two are both responsable for the lease and the car reguardless who is paying the payments.. Is there visitation order in place? If not then you would have to go down and file ASAP for sole custody if you wish to do that. Is he harm to the child?

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    • #3
      so if he takes t he car how do i get it back? since it is my car also.

      if i plan on taking my daughter somewhere else to stay with me until i figure everything out can he demand to see her? how does that unfold? are police involved and do they make me just hand her over to him or......? i am soo confused!! i have called for free legal consultations but i have not found anyone who can see me promtly.

      btw right now my daughter is not in danger but i am 99% sure he will try to take her out of state if i tell him i am leaving him. then who knows.........

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      • #4
        Originally posted by cooloonka View Post
        so if he takes t he car how do i get it back? since it is my car also.

        if i plan on taking my daughter somewhere else to stay with me until i figure everything out can he demand to see her? how does that unfold? are police involved and do they make me just hand her over to him or......? i am soo confused!! i have called for free legal consultations but i have not found anyone who can see me promtly.

        btw right now my daughter is not in danger but i am 99% sure he will try to take her out of state if i tell him i am leaving him. then who knows.........
        Has he been legally established as the father? Is there a custody/visitation in place? If he is not legally established the father, then you already have sole custody and he can not take her from you.

        If he is legally the father and no regular visitation schedule is in place, then he could possibly take her, so I suggest filing for sole custody before telling him.

        The can't break the lease and are still liable for 1/2 if he took you to small claims court. You would also need to take him to court over the car if he did not allow you to take it when you paid for it. You would need to transfer the car loan and title to just your name if that is at all possible.

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        • #5
          he is on the birth certificate. we live together and i work and he stays home with the baby. we never got any custody figured out because well we were living together and happy. so in that situation is custody assumed somehow?????

          he is flat broke without me. he has no way of hiring a lawyer or paying rent at all if i leave.
          so legally he is responsible for only 1/2 of the rent? so if l eave and he stays there he isn't responsible for the whole thing?
          can't i break the lease (and pay whatever fines) with the landlord and have her deal with him separately????

          my most important question is does he need a lawyer to see her after i leave?

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          • #6
            if he is on the birth certificate, then you will need to go down and file for sole custody and child support. At that point, he will need to file for visitation. Once you are granted sole custody (you can request an emergency hearing), if he were to take her, it would be parental kidnapping.
            I would do this before anything else. Your child is more important that the apt, car, etc and you need to get that handled before you plan on letting him know you are leaving. Once you have filed for those papers, take your daughter in the car and leave. Go stay with relatives, friends, etc. Tell them under no circumstances are they to allow him to take her out of their possession (if they are watching her) After this, have the locks on the car changed and call your landlord to work somthing out. The car is both of your legal responsibility and if he pushes the issue in court, agree to sell the car and get a new one in our name only or as someone else suggested, try to refinance the car in your name first.
            Take time off work and go to your local clerk's office and have them point you in the right direction on what forms you need to fill out.

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            • #7
              thank yo u so much. lastly i am wondering when i file for child support will that turn into a court hearing of some kind?

              i was told by a friend that if i file for child support the court will provide me with an attorney to process the custody matters. is this true? i can't really afford an attorney if i need one.

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              • #8
                clarification please. when you say he will have to file for custody does that mean he will have to hire an attorney?

                this gives me much peace of mind because i know he can not afford one.

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                • #9
                  once you are granted sole custody, he will have to file for visitation. This can be done without an attorney. He could also fight the sole custody filing that you make. Again, he could do this without a lawyer. There are forms a the court house that would allow him to do it himself. and father's rights groups that will help. When you file for custody, you will also ask for child support. that will then go thru the CSE office. You so not have to have an atty and they do not assign you one. Most CSE offices have an atty that works for the benefit of the state, but not for you in any way.
                  Keep in mind that since it sounds like he has been her primary care giver, he has a good case for custody himself.

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                  • #10
                    Cooloonka, is the same baby that you were pregnant with when you were asking questions before? If so, how would he leave the state with the baby? Where's his wife?
                    Last edited by mommyof4; 01-18-2007, 10:57 AM.
                    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                    (unique up on him)
                    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                    (same way)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Get an Attorney

                      You need an attorney, he could very well be the one to win CP status on the grounds that he has been the one staying at home BONDING with HIS daughter. He could also win support from you especially if you make considerably more than him. More than 0? He could claim that you chose your carrer over your daughter, and that this is what is causing the seperation, and so on.
                      What is veiwed is not always what is seen and
                      what is heard is not always what is spoken!
                      ~M. Noitall~

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                      • #12
                        oh no not the same baby. that was actually a friend of mine. theres been 3 of us asking questions under cooloonka. sorry for the confusion.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by cooloonka View Post
                          oh no not the same baby. that was actually a friend of mine. theres been 3 of us asking questions under cooloonka. sorry for the confusion.
                          Ooooh, okay. I was wondering what happened to everything else. Sorry. That makes me feel better. I couldn't imagine how you were getting yourself into so many situations.
                          Last edited by mommyof4; 01-18-2007, 11:00 AM.
                          HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                          How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                          (unique up on him)
                          How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                          (same way)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            my question was does he need an attorney to file for custody?

                            i am pretty positive he will not be awarded anything. i have firm evidence that he did not put forth our daughters best interests. the only reason i work and he doesn't is be cause he refused to work. if i didn't work there would be no food on the table.


                            being that he doesn't have a penny to his name (literally) i need to know if he needs an attorney to file for visitation..or is it something like small claims court wehre you represent yourself (usually)

                            ????????????????????????????????

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                            • #15
                              yeah crazy mixed up world we live in huh?

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