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What about support for MY son? Pennsylvania Pennsylvania

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  • What about support for MY son? Pennsylvania Pennsylvania

    My 8 year old son's father and I have had a rocky relationship over the past years. Most of the time, we do live together but we are not married. A few years ago, a life-threatening illness caused him to go on disability but he has since recovered enough to begin working again and drop his disability income. His ex-wife recently took him back to court to have her child support reinstated for their 16 year old son. She was awarded nearly half of his paycheck, which barely leaves him enough to support himself(car payment & insurance... forget about rent or mortgage), let alone our 8 year old child. I have had to take on another job, in addition to my full time job, to try to cover our living expenses and pay for increased hours in day care expenses since he began to work again, and my own medical condition is making this extremely difficult. My question is... Am I able to collect child support for my son, even though his father and I live together most of the time but are not married? I don't see how it is fair that his older son receives $500/month for support and my son gets the "nothing" that is left. Isn't my son entitled to some sort of monetary support similar to his half brother?

  • #2
    your boyfriends older son was their first and a responsibility that BF was well aware of before he decided to have another child- it's unfortunate that money is tight but that is the result of choices that dad made....and you for that matter- you knew you were having a child with someone who had a prior obligation and even did it without any of the benefits or protections of marriage. It doesn't seem fair- I know, but it is what it is- your options are to work more- which you are- cut expenses- budget more effectively or kick dad out and file for child support- with child #1 getting 50% of his pay now whatever you would get would be next to nothing- regardless of what he is ordered to pay
    http://www.gestaltmediation.com/

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    • #3
      Your Boyfriend might be able to ask for a modification. Since tha "old" support order was reinstated.
      IF I read it correctly, he was working, then medical problems, then working again. IF the current support order is based on his old pay, you can get it modified to reflect his new pay. You may need to bring in proof that the change in income happened because of a medical problem and through "no fault" of your boyfriend. IF he got behind in support during his medical problems that may be part of the reason it is so high .

      Link to state guidelines:
      http://www.pacode.com/secure/data/23...ap1910toc.html

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      • #4
        Originally posted by stuckinamuck
        Your Boyfriend might be able to ask for a modification. Since tha "old" support order was reinstated.
        IF I read it correctly, he was working, then medical problems, then working again. IF the current support order is based on his old pay, you can get it modified to reflect his new pay. You may need to bring in proof that the change in income happened because of a medical problem and through "no fault" of your boyfriend. IF he got behind in support during his medical problems that may be part of the reason it is so high .

        Link to state guidelines:
        http://www.pacode.com/secure/data/23...ap1910toc.html
        He will not be able to modify the order if the order was in effect the entire time he was not paying. If he owes arrearages, that amount will not be changed based on his current financial situation. I couldn't understand if the order is being enforced or if the original order was 'abolished'. Even if it is modified, the first son is going to be the first child taken care of by any child support. Any support the OP would recieve (assuming that she kick him out and sue for CS) would be based on his income minus the original amount of support he is ordered to pay. As they are not married and were not when the child was born, if he is not the LEGAL father (acknowledgement of paternity at the time of birth or court ordered DNA) she would have to sue for paternity before any child support could be ordered. This is a mess.
        Last edited by mommyof4; 08-23-2006, 09:01 AM.
        HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
        How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
        (unique up on him)
        How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
        (same way)

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        • #5
          Originally posted by mommyof4
          He will not be able to modify the order if the order was in effect the entire time he was not paying. If he owes arrearages, that amount will not be changed based on his current financial situation. I couldn't understand if the order is being enforced or if the original order was 'abolished'. Even if it is modified, the first son is going to be the first child taken care of by any child support. Any support the OP would recieve (assuming that she kick him out and sue for CS) would be based on his income minus the original amount of support he is ordered to pay. As they are not married and were not when the child was born, if he is not the LEGAL father (acknowledgement of paternity at the time of birth or court ordered DNA) she would have to sue for paternity before any child support could be ordered. This is a mess.
          Sorry, I have to agree with stuckinamuck on this. IF the OP's BF's order was abated due to his medical situation and then reinstated without modification as OP indicates, then yes he should file to modify the amount of monthly payments. Since disability is an involuntary reduction in income there isn't any reason not to have the on-going CS calculated at Dad's reduced income. Even if he owes arrears, the court still has to order payment based on his income now because it is an invlountary reduction in income.
          Either way, OP's BF should seek a modification if it wasn't done at the time of reinstatement.

          OP: Since you and dad aren't married you should be able to file for CS, BUT- the amount you recieve cannot and will not be equal to the amount the first child's mother recieves. That's the way it works for subsequent children of a NCP.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by xena
            Sorry, I have to agree with stuckinamuck on this. IF the OP's BF's order was abated due to his medical situation and then reinstated without modification as OP indicates, then yes he should file to modify the amount of monthly payments. Since disability is an involuntary reduction in income there isn't any reason not to have the on-going CS calculated at Dad's reduced income. Even if he owes arrears, the court still has to order payment based on his income now because it is an invlountary reduction in income.
            Either way, OP's BF should seek a modification if it wasn't done at the time of reinstatement.

            OP: Since you and dad aren't married you should be able to file for CS, BUT- the amount you recieve cannot and will not be equal to the amount the first child's mother recieves. That's the way it works for subsequent children of a NCP.
            Okay, that is what I was not clear on. Was the order abated or did he just not pay the support and it was not enforced? Sorry, if I confused everyone. My point was that if if was NOT abated then he would still owe the amount from the order. Did I explain that any more clearly? Because quite honestly, it sounds jumbled to me, but I seem to be having a problem putting it into words.
            HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
            How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
            (unique up on him)
            How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
            (same way)

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            • #7
              Originally posted by mommyof4
              Okay, that is what I was not clear on. Was the order abated or did he just not pay the support and it was not enforced? Sorry, if I confused everyone. My point was that if if was NOT abated then he would still owe the amount from the order. Did I explain that any more clearly? Because quite honestly, it sounds jumbled to me, but I seem to be having a problem putting it into words.
              At first I was a little confused then I read that OP said that his ex went back to court to have the CS "reinstated". I took that to mean that the CS had been abated during the time of his disability. I could be wrong though- if I remember correctly, I was wrong once, about 10 yrs ago. LOL
              Xena

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              • #8
                Originally posted by xena
                At first I was a little confused then I read that OP said that his ex went back to court to have the CS "reinstated". I took that to mean that the CS had been abated during the time of his disability. I could be wrong though- if I remember correctly, I was wrong once, about 10 yrs ago. LOL
                Xena
                One way to solve this. OP, was the order abated or was it just not enforced? I am prepared to admit that I am wrong this ONE AND ONLY TIME, and even then, I am only misled by the post, not wrong. Big of me, isn't it???(kidding, people!)

                HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                (unique up on him)
                How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                (same way)

                Comment


                • #9
                  Thank you for all of your responses! Let me try to clear some of the confusion. Before my BF became disabled years ago, he was paying CS regularly for his older son at about $45/week. When he became ill, he did fall behind with his payments. He began collecting disability about a year later and the original order for support was dropped since both his older son and my son were receiving money through disability. An additional $75/month was deducted from my BF's disability check and forwarded to his ex-wife to cover the back support owed and has since be paid in full, in fact, the payments continued and she was paid well over and above the amount of the original arrearage. Anyway, it was when he began working again that this new order of support was created. I was under the impression that all other children that the father had were taken into consideraton when determining the amount of support to be paid, regardless to whether they were born in or out of wedlock. We were well aware of his obligation to his older son when my son was born, and would never deny that. We do everything within our means to provide for him over and above the child support he receives, however, the new order is so much higher that we cannot make ends meet in our home anymore. Am I to assume that the only way for me to collect any child support for my son is to make his father leave our home? With the paycheck he currently receives, he can barely afford his car payment and insurance... he would never be able to afford rent on his own. Then, would they tell me that my son still gets nothing because it all goes to his first son and there is nothing left for mine? I'm really trying to understand how this works. Sorry if it seems that I'm not catching on, but it was never a problem before. Thanks!

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                  • #10
                    Okay, I will now admit that *gulp* that you need to disregard my post as it pertains to the modificaion of the child support order, (Ugh, that was hard. Thank goodness I won't have to do that again for a very long time)

                    Seriously, the order was abated, and he does need to file for a modification based on his current income. As to your child, if you file for child support, yes your child's support amount will be based on his income MINUS the amount of the existing child support order. Yes, it sucks, but the court is not going to take support away from the first child. The guidelines clearly state that the child support order comes first and all other expenditures must be accomodating to that order. The only reference I could find in the PA statutes for CS when the parents are living together was in regard to a child that had been removed from the home and both parents were responsible for child support. If someone can find any other information, I am sure they will post the information you need. In the meantime, I will keep looking.
                    HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                    How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                    (unique up on him)
                    How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                    (same way)

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      OP- just wanted to let you know that when I filed for child support from my ex, they did not take into account that he had an older son that was to be supported before mine. They made him pay both of us the same amount each week. You really never know what a judge will order I guess.

                      In my opinion, that is the only fair thing. If two people are married and have 6 kids, the older ones do not usually continue to get the same things when the family grows so it should not be different just because you're husband's family grew outside of the first marriage.
                      Last edited by arkansasmom; 08-23-2006, 03:08 PM. Reason: wrong wording

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by arkansasmom
                        OP- just wanted to let you know that when I filed for child support from my ex, they did not take into account that he had an older son that was to be supported before mine. They made him pay both of us the same amount each week. You really never know what a judge will order I guess.

                        In my opinion, that is the only fair thing. If two people are married and have 6 kids, the older ones do not usually continue to get the same things when the family grows so it should not be different just because you're husband's family grew outside of the first marriage.
                        www.pacode.com/secure/data/231/chapter1910/s1910.16-7.html
                        HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                        How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                        (unique up on him)
                        How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                        (same way)

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Mommyof4, I was just telling Op what happened in my case. There may be a law like that in Arkansas too. Do you know where I could find it by chance?

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                          • #14
                            I too am only speaking about what happened in my case, because it is possible for the second child to get more money than the first child, but it doesn't happen vey often. My daughter's father pays support on his first child ($322 a month) and he pays support for our daughter ($494 a month). The only reason I get more money is the boy's mom does work, whereas I am a full time college student. The child support recovery unit did take into consideration that he was paying for another child, but they still set my amount higher. I just depends on the situations at hand.

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