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CAN I MAKE HIM GO AWAY!!!!!! Mississippi

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  • CAN I MAKE HIM GO AWAY!!!!!! Mississippi

    hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
    Last edited by Little_Weveek; 06-10-2006, 11:24 PM. Reason: more information

  • #2
    Originally posted by Little_Weveek
    I am trying very hard to find a way to make my daughters father go away.... IS this possible legally????
    Why do you want to make him go away? If he's the father, he has rights (as long as those rights have not been terminated by a court) such as the right to petition for custody, visitation, etc. No one can give you a more specific answer without more details.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Little_Weveek
      When I was got pregnant My daughters father made it clear that he didnt want the child. I tried to keep him informed but he ignored me or only came by to yell at me and tell me how I screwed up his life..... I even called him and asked him to come back to mississippi for her birth... My docs were inducing me because of medical problems... He showed up made a big fess about being her father and then when it came down to signing her B.C. at the hospital he REFUSED!!!!!!!
      Dang, we were posting at the same time! If youíre not married and paternity hasnít been established, then right now he has no rights. So while you may not be able to make him 'go away' you donít have to let him see the child. But, if you want child support, then paternity will have to be established and once that is done, he will then have the right to petition for visitation (or custody for that matter, although heíd likely have to prove you unfit in order to obtain it). Even if you donít want child support and therefore donít petition to have paternity established, he can later decide to petition for it himself.
      Last edited by pty; 06-05-2006, 11:03 PM.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Little_Weveek
        My ex husband and I since we found out that the judge never signed our divorce we decided to move back in together ....since we were legally married still......LOL
        As far as my daughters father He took a DNA test and it came back 99.9999% and then he called me and promised to pay child support but i told him to go away
        I'm confused. You're still married (although maybe you didn't know it) and had a child with another man? Is that right?

        Comment


        • #5
          Okay, if youíre married then that changes things. Technically, right now, your husband is the legal father. Although, the fact that he was deployed during this time and therefore could not have impregnated you muddies the waters. But the bottom line is that until Daughterís Dad has legally established paternity, he doesnít have any rights. However, it sounds like he has petition the court to establish paternity.

          So, does he have any rights now? No. Will he have rights once paternity is established? Yes. Despite the fact that you and your husband want to raise this child as your own, heís the biological father. Things would likely be different if he had sit around and not done anything about it for years, and then decided to attempt to establish paternityÖbut I get the impression that this child is very young, so thatís not the case.

          As far as terminating his rights, you would have to have a very valid reason for that (ie: abuse, neglect, felony assault of a child, etc). In my opinion, youíve not stated anything that would be grounds for termination of parental rights.

          Now, Iím sure if any of that is incorrect (although I donít believe it is) that others on here will chime in.

          Let me just add this totally personal commentÖdespite all that happened prior to the childís birth (and Iím sure to you it was no small thing) it seems his reason for not signing the birth certificate was merely because he wanted to first ensure that it was in fact his child (because once he found that out, it seems like he then wanted to take financial responsibility/be a part of the child's life). You really canít fault the man for that. In all likelihood heís petitioned for sole custody merely because once he knew for certain that he was the father and then attempted to step up to the plate, you told him to go away, and that pissed him off.

          Comment


          • #6
            Case That May Help You

            There was a child custody case in Mississippi a few years ago....

            I will sum it up for you....

            two people had an affair..... both were married to others.... The babys mother decided to keep the baby and her husband put his name on the B.C.

            The baby's bio-father took a DNA test and proved the child to be his... He then filed for joint custody wanted to pay support and have visitation of his kid with his wife.

            They went to court and the baby's mother and her husband filed to have the bio-fathers rights terminated on the ground that by him being inserted into the baby's life that would JEOPODIZAE THE HARMONY OF THE FAMILY UNIT!!!

            The Judge agreed that this would upset the childs life and upsetting the harmony of the family was not in the best interest of the childs life ..... The JUDGE TERMINATED ANY AND ALL RIGHTS THE BIO-FATHER HAD OR MAY HAVE IN THE FUTURE... HE GRANTED the mothers husbands request for a FULL ADOPTION of the baby!!!!

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            • #7
              wished my lawyer would of thought to fight my case that way

              i was in the same position awhile ago and the bf does have visitation with my child and it has been hell for him(child). he is only 2 and he throws a fit like i have never seen a child throw. everytime he has to go he just goes bezerk and the bf just gets him out of the car and leaves. my son is going through hell and he's only two. my husbands name is still on the birth certificate but is no longer the legal father in the courts eye's but my son knows who daddy is (my husband ). that is what is important.

              i am just hoping he sees what this is doing to my son and will come to his senses. i never wanted this guy in the picture and he had (bf) stated that he did not want to be a part of his life. the only reason he has been is for his mom, no matter the hell he is putting my son through. my older children see what their baby brother goes through and they have alot of anger towards the bf and its not pretty. it not only affects the child/ren involved it has an affect on everyone in the family.

              i hope that all works out for you and you family.and i would be sure to mention the case on the aboeve post. it may help it may not. i would almost it is the wife of the bf that is pushing this also. good luck to you and your family.

              Comment


              • #8
                Little Weveek, paternity has been established. He is suing for his paternal rights. Be prepared that he WILL get them. No, unless you are completely unfit, he will not get sole custody. He will get visitation and possible joint legal custody. YOU need to file for child support.
                HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
                How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
                (unique up on him)
                How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
                (same way)

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by mother_of_3
                  There was a child custody case in Mississippi a few years ago....

                  I will sum it up for you....

                  two people had an affair..... both were married to others.... The babys mother decided to keep the baby and her husband put his name on the B.C.

                  The baby's bio-father took a DNA test and proved the child to be his... He then filed for joint custody wanted to pay support and have visitation of his kid with his wife.

                  They went to court and the baby's mother and her husband filed to have the bio-fathers rights terminated on the ground that by him being inserted into the baby's life that would JEOPODIZAE THE HARMONY OF THE FAMILY UNIT!!!

                  The Judge agreed that this would upset the childs life and upsetting the harmony of the family was not in the best interest of the childs life ..... The JUDGE TERMINATED ANY AND ALL RIGHTS THE BIO-FATHER HAD OR MAY HAVE IN THE FUTURE... HE GRANTED the mothers husbands request for a FULL ADOPTION of the baby!!!!
                  Either the judge was a complete idiot, or high on drugs! I'm sure there were other extensive circumstances other than what you described! I can understand if the child had reached a certain age where it was secure in it's identity, believe on it's own that the step dad was it's real father! On the other hand, maybe the bio-dad was veiwed as unfit? Do you know the whole story?....Do tell !
                  Some live and learn while some learn to live

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by mommyof4
                    Little Weveek, paternity has been established. He is suing for his paternal rights. Be prepared that he WILL get them. No, unless you are completely unfit, he will not get sole custody. He will get visitation and possible joint legal custody. YOU need to file for child support.
                    Hey there!... thanks for leaning towards advocacy!!!! You do have a level head!
                    Some live and learn while some learn to live

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by mother_of_3
                      There was a child custody case in Mississippi a few years ago....

                      I will sum it up for you....

                      two people had an affair..... both were married to others.... The babys mother decided to keep the baby and her husband put his name on the B.C.

                      The baby's bio-father took a DNA test and proved the child to be his... He then filed for joint custody wanted to pay support and have visitation of his kid with his wife.

                      They went to court and the baby's mother and her husband filed to have the bio-fathers rights terminated on the ground that by him being inserted into the baby's life that would JEOPODIZAE THE HARMONY OF THE FAMILY UNIT!!!

                      The Judge agreed that this would upset the childs life and upsetting the harmony of the family was not in the best interest of the childs life ..... The JUDGE TERMINATED ANY AND ALL RIGHTS THE BIO-FATHER HAD OR MAY HAVE IN THE FUTURE... HE GRANTED the mothers husbands request for a FULL ADOPTION of the baby!!!!
                      Iím originally from MS, and my family still lives there. My mom (whoís a big news buff) generally tells me about cases like this, because she always has an opinion about them, but apparently she missed hearing about this one. So, whatís the name of this case? Iíd be very interested in reading it. If the judge felt this would 'upset the childís life' then itís very likely that bio dad did not pursue his rights in a timely manner. If a child is 4/5/6/etc and has only known one man as their dad, then yes, it would be upsetting at that point to allow a stranger to enter their life with the title of 'father'. If, on the other hand, the child is an infant, itís a totally different situation.

                      Why should a man be denied his parental rights just because the mother of his child is married to someone else (and in this particular case Mom even thought she was divorced)? Any time a married woman sleeps with another man, sheís taking a chance that a child will result from that union. If that then jeopardizes the harmony of the family unitÖwell, those are consequences that Mom has to deal with.

                      OP, I think there is a very good chance this man will be awarded visitation, which is probably all he really wants anyway. I still think heís only suing for custody because you pissed him off (because he didnít do it or threaten to do it until after you told him to go away). If you havenít already talked to an attorney, you need to. Please come back and let us know what happens.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by mhoov
                        i was in the same position awhile ago and the bf does have visitation with my child and it has been hell for him(child). he is only 2 and he throws a fit like i have never seen a child throw. everytime he has to go he just goes bezerk and the bf just gets him out of the car and leaves.

                        Why? Is Dad mistreating him in some way? If not, then maybe the child is sensing how you feel about the situation and reacting to that. If that's the case (and I'm not saying it is, but if it...) then I urge you to do whatever you can to make the situation easier on your son (even if it means grinding your teeth to keep from those negative words, etc in check).

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          fyi

                          Originally posted by pty
                          Why? Is Dad mistreating him in some way? If not, then maybe the child is sensing how you feel about the situation and reacting to that. If that's the case (and I'm not saying it is, but if it...) then I urge you to do whatever you can to make the situation easier on your son (even if it means grinding your teeth to keep from those negative words, etc in check).

                          when visitation started my son cried everytime. then the overnights started and he would get more upset each time, then he (bf) changed weekends that he worked so on his weekends to have my son he would take him to a sitter (mind you my son has never been with a sitter EVER). let alone an elderly woman with no other kids around to play with. my son is a very active 2 yr old and i can barely keep up with him. he's into everything. anyway, back on the subject, i do keep my opinions to myself except on this board. i even try to get him to go, but nothing works. at home he feels safe and very loved, has 5 siblings and a cousin at home. he is never alone at home. its been this way since he's been born, then to take that away from him is a big emotional adjustment for him and he has no way of dealing with this. so in my opinion why not let him be happy at home with his family and when he is older then try it again. thats just my opinion and i know i will have upset alot of others but i can have my own opinion. i know my son and i see what it is doing to him and i know that the bf is only doing it for his mom (which is the elderly sitter(75-80) who ends up having my son on the weekends. and that has alot to do with the way i feel about the whole thing.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Misbehavin

                            Originally posted by mhoov
                            i was in the same position awhile ago and the bf does have visitation with my child and it has been hell for him(child). he is only 2 and he throws a fit like i have never seen a child throw. everytime he has to go he just goes bezerk and the bf just gets him out of the car and leaves. my son is going through hell and he's only two. my husbands name is still on the birth certificate but is no longer the legal father in the courts eye's but my son knows who daddy is (my husband ). that is what is important.

                            i am just hoping he sees what this is doing to my son and will come to his senses. i never wanted this guy in the picture and he had (bf) stated that he did not want to be a part of his life. the only reason he has been is for his mom, no matter the hell he is putting my son through. my older children see what their baby brother goes through and they have alot of anger towards the bf and its not pretty. it not only affects the child/ren involved it has an affect on everyone in the family.

                            i hope that all works out for you and you family.and i would be sure to mention the case on the aboeve post. it may help it may not. i would almost it is the wife of the bf that is pushing this also. good luck to you and your family.
                            There are so many posters looking for the best way to keep peace for the childrens sake, trying everything possible to obtain it without putting the children " in the middle". Now i'm knot being apprehensive, but i think that what is really IMPORTANT is the childs stability! Which in my ( weird opinion), rest soley on YOUR ability to see the reflection of his bio-dads face when you look at the childs face. Like you obviously saw when you laid down with the man....when you did want him "in the picture!" Allowing the child to suffer to prove a point or hope that the confusion will run bio-dad away, only hurts the child! No, what is important is that the child sees adults being able to function in the mist of disagreements. Which one do you agree with? PS. It's not your child, It's "YALL'S CHILD"..... Tough love!!
                            Some live and learn while some learn to live

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by knot
                              There are so many posters looking for the best way to keep peace for the childrens sake, trying everything possible to obtain it without putting the children " in the middle". Now i'm knot being apprehensive, but i think that what is really IMPORTANT is the childs stability! Which in my ( weird opinion), rest soley on YOUR ability to see the reflection of his bio-dads face when you look at the childs face. Like you obviously saw when you laid down with the man....when you did want him "in the picture!" Allowing the child to suffer to prove a point or hope that the confusion will run bio-dad away, only hurts the child! No, what is important is that the child sees adults being able to function in the mist of disagreements. Which one do you agree with? PS. It's not your child, It's "YALL'S CHILD"..... Tough love!!

                              it is my child!!! he is not doing this to be part of my son's life as daddy he is only doing it so the bf's mom is not alone and can have the child with her, if he wanted to have him for him and actually play the role of daddy then it would be different. th bf had him on the weekends that he had off for one weekend then asked his employer to change weekends. that tells me he does not want the time with my son. my opinion on men like that is totally different, i am all for that but my case is different.as the original post is in my opinion ( if not then i am wrong) i am not wrong about my case. therefor it is hurting my son. and that i do not agree with. he could have enjoyed 4 whole days with the child he had that he gave that up voluntarily. his choice no one else's.

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