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New Father needs help PLEASE!

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  • New Father needs help PLEASE!

    I found out 6 months ago I am the father of a now 3 year old boy. His name is Nicholas, and I absolutely love him. His biological mother lost custody of him and her parents currently have full custody. They work for the government and are very wealthy. They have had him since January 2005. They hate me, and I know they are not happy about me fighting to be in my son's life. They have denied me unsupervised visitation and I only see him every other saturday from 12pm-4pm at their house. I would like the chance to raise my son, and I was wondering my chances of winning a custody battle. I am currently married and have been for 2 years, we have a 3 bed room house, and no other children yet. Anyone who could maybe give me some advise, PLEASE DO

  • #2
    Originally posted by klubmate85
    I found out 6 months ago I am the father of a now 3 year old boy. His name is Nicholas, and I absolutely love him. His biological mother lost custody of him and her parents currently have full custody. They work for the government and are very wealthy. They have had him since January 2005. They hate me, and I know they are not happy about me fighting to be in my son's life. They have denied me unsupervised visitation and I only see him every other saturday from 12pm-4pm at their house. I would like the chance to raise my son, and I was wondering my chances of winning a custody battle. I am currently married and have been for 2 years, we have a 3 bed room house, and no other children yet. Anyone who could maybe give me some advise, PLEASE DO
    Why are they the ones dictating the visitation schedule? Considering that you were not around for the first 2 1/2 years of this child's life (the fact that it was not your fault is irrelevant right now), supervised visitation is pretty standard. HOWEVER, visitation needs to be decided by a judge, not the grandparents.

    The fact that you did not know about the child, will help your chances for custody, but it will not be a quick and easy process.

    First, paternity needs to be established and a COURT ORDERED visitation schedule needs to be put into place. I don't know if the judge will take into consideration any visitation you have had in the past that did not go through the court. It should start as frequent (minimum once a week), short (1-3 hours), supervised visits that progress into regular UNSUPERVISED visits as quickly as possible.

    Once a solid relationship has been made, then custody could be addressed. Normally, a parents rights virtually always override the rights of a non-parent. But since the child has been with them for over a year, at the very least, you should expect them to get some type of court ordered visitation. There is also a possibility that they may be able to retain custody. All else being equal (BOTH you & your wife AND the gp's being equally FIT to raise a child, personal wealth excluded) you SHOULD have a very good chance at gaining custody.

    You do need to realize that you may NOT get full custody. As much as we would like to believe that justice will prevail, it's not always true. Many custody battles have been won simply because one party has deeper pockets and can afford to drag the matter out until the other party runs out of money and gives up.

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    • #3
      Just Finding Out

      YOU SHOULD HAVE A GOOD CHANCE....

      If you can go into court with the support of your wife.. You have to be 100% honest withthe court and You can ask the court to appoint a lawyer for your son. They are called Guardinan of Lights..... (please forgive my spelling is horrible) but anyway it is a court appointed attorney that doesnt work for you or the grandparents THIS attorney's only job is to DECIDE and RECOMMEND to the judge what is best for the child.

      Why did you not know until just recently about the child??? HOW Exactly did you find out that child was yours?? Do You have a DNA TEST????
      Last edited by Little_Weveek; 06-05-2006, 10:18 PM.

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      • #4
        An attorney that represents the interests of a child is called a Guardian Ad Litem, and that is a very important request to make once you're in court.

        You will have to establish paternity first, before any type of filing with the court for custody. Otherwise you will be throwing away your money. Any attorney worth the salt off an ants *** should tell you this.

        I do not know the circumstances of your case but the longer the child is with his grandparents, the harder it will be for you to obtain custody. In an Ohio Appeals court ruling, the court denied a mother's the right to have full custody because the she could not prove that the grandparents were unfit. The case came about because the parents of the child, lost custody of the child during a nasty divorce where the court decided that neither parent was fit and custody was given to the grandparents. They based the ruling on the fact that even though the mother had gotten her life together, that by itself did not change the fact that the child's stable circumstances with the grandparents had not changed. And that the childs best interest were served by staying where the child had come to know as home with the persons who were acting in loco parentis.

        Perhaps your situation would be different in that you had no knowlege of the child but as I said before, the longer the child is with his grandparents.........


        Do the DNA right away
        Don't listen to a word I say because ya know I've gotta be crazy to be a Brown's fan.

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        • #5
          Do Something Now

          MOVE QUICKLY!!!!!!

          Becareful..... YOU NEED TO CHECK on the laws concernind ABANDONMENT.... IF they can prove you knew about your child prior to the 6 months that you state....... They may have you........

          GET A GOOD ATTORNEY!!!!! Make sure you meet with sveral ones until you have one that u feel confident in....

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          • #6
            Originally posted by mother_of_3
            MOVE QUICKLY!!!!!!

            Becareful..... YOU NEED TO CHECK on the laws concernind ABANDONMENT.... IF they can prove you knew about your child prior to the 6 months that you state....... They may have you........

            GET A GOOD ATTORNEY!!!!! Make sure you meet with sveral ones until you have one that u feel confident in....
            WTF does moving have to do with anything?

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            • #7
              Originally posted by ceara
              WTF does moving have to do with anything?
              I think it means to check out the laws quickly and file anything that needs to be filed before the deadline "expires". I don't think it meant to actually MOVE. More like hurry. However, since the OP states that he has been seeing his son, abandonment is not even close to being an issue.
              HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!
              How do you catch a very rare rabbit?
              (unique up on him)
              How do catch an ordinary rabbit?
              (same way)

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              • #8
                Originally posted by mommyof4
                I think it means to check out the laws quickly and file anything that needs to be filed before the deadline "expires". I don't think it meant to actually MOVE. More like hurry. However, since the OP states that he has been seeing his son, abandonment is not even close to being an issue.
                If paternity hasn't been legally established, he doesn't even have a child to abandon!

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                • #9
                  The first thing I would dois go down and file for paternity! It is going to make you look good in the eyes of a judge that you are filing for the paternity test.... Then go from there. I would get a lawyer asap.... Then you can esablish visitation rights .... And hopefully live a happy life with your child. You can't just swipe the child away from his mother so why don't you two work out an agreement?

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