I need some help! Almost a month ago my 15 year old brother-in-law had to move in with us because my mother-in-law is a bad alcoholic. He found her face down in the kitchen in a puddle of blood. She had gotten so drunk that she blacked out, passed out, and fell on her face. My husband and I took her to the hospital. The doctor told us she was going to have to call child services, we begged her not to and to let him come live with us until she gets better. Well, it's been almost a month and she claims she hasn't been drinking. However, for the past two weeks she's been calling my brother-in-law everyday, asking when he's coming home, and tellling him that she was on medication that night (not drinking---lie, lie, lie!!!), and now everything is mine and my husband's fault. We made him move in with us and blah, blah, blah! I can't take it anymore! He doesn't want to go home to her. She's completely mentally unstable! I've talked to an attorney and he said our chances of getting him are really good. However, my mother-in-law's boyfriend is extremely rich and if we had to fight to get custody, he would help her to pay for the fight to continue! The upside is that she had an affair while she was married and that's how she got my brother-in-law, but her ex-husband doesn't know that. If he knew that then he could sue her. The guy that is his father is still her boyfriend (almost 17 years), he's been married to another woman the ENTIRE time! I came from a reserved and somewhat sane household! My husband is a great guy and you would never think this is his family! We've been together for 4 years, married for 7 months. He's 21 and I'm 20. I know we're young, but my brother-in-law has it better at our house. We have a house, not a trailor(like her), he has his own room, there's not any yelling and we don't call him names. We love having him there!!! We go to Al-Anon meetings and church every week, plus he's getting involved in Youth at our church now. I need help knowing what our options may be and what to do basically! What are his options? HELP!

HelplessinTN
Nashville, Tennessee

You probably should have let the Dr. call child protective services. That would have been the best thing to document the problems. Now you are left with her word against yours, which as you said, her word is that she had not been drinking. When a child is taken from a home there is a good chance they will be placed with relatives, that could have been you. Your chances of trying to get custody of him are slim to none. I think your best option is to manipulate the mother into letting him stay with you "temporarily" for as long as she will let him. Maybe he can go home, but come visit you...everynight. Will she even notice if she is an alcoholic? Anyway, your legal options are not very good since the boy has a mother and a father and to prove both of them unfit to care for him in order for a custody change would be extremely difficult.

Well, the father isn't in the picture except for paying child support. He doesn't want anything to do with my brother-in-law. So I'm not worried about that. As for her, I don't think it would be hard to get him from her. It's in all of her medical records that she has Cronic Alcoholism. Also, she is extremely financially unstable. She has SEVERAL different collection agencies contacting her about bills from the present time to two years ago. She even got something in my husband's name and social security number right before we were married. That was a pain to deal with. We wouldn't have gotten him if child services had taken him. He would have gone straight into Foster Care, it would have been harder for us to get him out of that. (According to my attorney and Al-Anon.)

Thanks for the advice though.