I live in Illinois but was divorced in Missouri. I have Two son's ages 18 whom I have sole custody of and the other is 14 whom my X-wife and I have joint legal custody of, with her having Phisical custody. The problem is my 14 year old son who is a straight a student,highly intelligent and has more common sense than most adults is being refused the right to come and live with me. The subject was brought to his mothers attention almost 2 years ago and after she refused to hear of any change of custody, I filed the proper paper work and after a year and a half battle and several thousand dollars later the judge decided there was not enough " Change in surcumstance" to warrent a change. The only change the judge did make was awarding me sole custody of my 18 year old. My 14 year old son was devistated. Along with loosing his faith in our legal system It has distroyed any kind of trust or respect he had left in his mother. Both he and his brother testified in a two day attorney battle. My wife and I were not proven incompetant, we are not alcoholics or drug addicts. I am the National sales director for a major company My Wife works for a local hospitol we pay our bills and support our cummunity. But most of all we love our boys unconditionally. My X- wife however purgerd herself during testimony, tried to hide her income and was confronted by both of her sons during testimony,that the lack of love,effection,respect for them and for me,the lies deceit and control she has exercised over the years is what had brought them to court.Both the judge and guardian atlidem could not believe the statements coming from her mouth, but they still ruled in her favor. Since the judgement my son has run away refused to go to school and refused to go back to his mothers after my visits. This is not his nature. He refuses to accept the decision and can't understand how anyone could have the power to keep him from being happy and living with his dad. His mother has told him she did not care what he did or how he felt about her, she would never give up custody. I am at the end of the line and can't understand either. Please help me find a way to give my son the happiness he so needs and deserves. HELP!

I suggest that maybe you advise your child to be a good student, get a job so he can show that he can support himself and as soon as he can, likely age 16, pursue emacipation as a minor at that point. I don't think there is much else that he can really do at this point because the court decided and heard all sides. You can try to get more time with the child or work something out with the mother. You also may need to figure out if she really wants the kids or if this is about money- would she let you have the kids if she got the money still? The way you said she said she would never agree to give up custody, I have to ask if that is about money or the kids.

She has inherited wealth. So in the sense, dose she need the money? No. what she wants is to continue to take from me what ever she can. And God forbid she would ever have to pay me a dime. What I feel it is really about, is control. If she where to ever give up or lose custody of my son, she would lose control over me.