Hi i live in the state of MA. i am having a big problem. i am a 20 yr old and i got prego of a 30 yr old man, who was alredy maried. he has been living outsite his wife's house just over a year now. the problem is that he has desided that we should move together, but with all the money he is giving the other woman for their 2 kids, i practically feel like if i was working alone. he has to give her, just about half or more of what he earns by-weekly (which is when he gets paid). i am just about 7 months, and he tells me he does not have the money to buy ANY of the baby's stuff. at this point, i should not even be working so many hours, my feet hurt, my back too and that is not good for any prego woman to be overdoing things like that. Anyways here is the big problem, that i would really like someone with law experience to PLEASE advice me, and tell me what would be best for me to do. I was told by someone on this website, that as soon as the baby was born to file for CS (child support), because usually the woman that files for CS first gets more money for the child. however, i have 2 more months left. his wife has alredy gone to court where she was told that the amounth that he legally has to give her is a total of 1111, for both kids. but she has not file for CS yet. If she does not file for CS before my baby is born, then will i be able to go and file first and would the amount he has to give her turn out to be less than 1111 dollars a month? i mean, i am so agrevated that she hahs not file and he is paying her already, and he does not even have money to buy anything for the baby. i do not mind that he gives his kids money, but not when is going to be so unfair to ours, and the fact that he has a legally addopted daughter, which is the reason why he has to give the other woman more money gets me really angry. i guess that the bottom line question qould be:
- IF SHE DOES NOT FILE FOR CS BEFORE I DO, BY THE TIME THAT SHE DOES GO TO FILE, WILL THE AMOUNT OF 1111 DOLLARS TURN OUT TO BE MUCH LESS?
- EVEN THOUGH SHE HAS ALREDY GONE TO COURT AND THEY TOLD HER THAT IF SHE DID FILE FOR CS, THE AMOUNT OF 1111 DOLLARS WAS WHAT HE HAD TO PAY TO HER, WILL THAT AFFECT ME, JUST AS IF SHE HAD FILE FOR CS? OR DOES THIS NOT REALLY MATTER?
i know this all sounds really selfish, but this man has not even given our daughter a single penny, or me seeing my condision. PLEASE LET ME KNOW LEGAL ANS TO THIS ASAP. i am so desperate that i would really like to know. thank you really much for taking the time to read all this, have a nice day.

It depends on the state you are in...it could turn out either way...The judge told my husband that any kid(s) born after his child with ex...has no priority over the 1st born or eldest child from previous relationship(when a support order has already been placed) which mean't that any children me and my hubby have in the future should not be made with the intentions of thinking it will lower hubby's child support obligation to ex. (Judge's words to my hubby)

It is up to the judge if they allow for a downward modification of existing child support because of new kid(s) brought into this world...and normally judges don't like to lower existing child support order's because their train of thought is...if you have to ask for lower child support payments on behalf of existing kid(s)..then the NCP should practice safe sex...so therefore they feel it teaches NCP's to not have anymore kids,(or so they think).. so they try to make it hard for them to live.

So keep us posted and best of luck....also try to get a consultation with attorney.

Is he still married?? If not..
I would get married ASAP. have him take his kids half the time, and let the judge know that your husband's situation is different where he takes the children half the time, have a new wife and another child to care for. The court system works. You just have to approach it the right way. Courts like to see families try hard to support for all the children. If they see that he has a new family and still cares to take his children half the time then they will be more reasonable. But if you are just his girlfriend or the mother of his third child they probably will not take him seriously or sympathize with him at all.

Hi i live in the state of MA. i am having a big problem. i am a 20 yr old and i got prego of a 30 yr old man, who was alredy maried. he has been living outsite his wife's house just over a year now. the problem is that he has desided that we should move together, but with all the money he is giving the other woman for their 2 kids, i practically feel like if i was working alone. he has to give her, just about half or more of what he earns by-weekly (which is when he gets paid). i am just about 7 months, and he tells me he does not have the money to buy ANY of the baby's stuff. at this point, i should not even be working so many hours, my feet hurt, my back too and that is not good for any prego woman to be overdoing things like that. Anyways here is the big problem, that i would really like someone with law experience to PLEASE advice me, and tell me what would be best for me to do. I was told by someone on this website, that as soon as the baby was born to file for CS (child support), because usually the woman that files for CS first gets more money for the child. however, i have 2 more months left. his wife has alredy gone to court where she was told that the amounth that he legally has to give her is a total of 1111, for both kids. but she has not file for CS yet. If she does not file for CS before my baby is born, then will i be able to go and file first and would the amount he has to give her turn out to be less than 1111 dollars a month? i mean, i am so agrevated that she hahs not file and he is paying her already, and he does not even have money to buy anything for the baby. i do not mind that he gives his kids money, but not when is going to be so unfair to ours, and the fact that he has a legally addopted daughter, which is the reason why he has to give the other woman more money gets me really angry. i guess that the bottom line question qould be:
- IF SHE DOES NOT FILE FOR CS BEFORE I DO, BY THE TIME THAT SHE DOES GO TO FILE, WILL THE AMOUNT OF 1111 DOLLARS TURN OUT TO BE MUCH LESS?
- EVEN THOUGH SHE HAS ALREDY GONE TO COURT AND THEY TOLD HER THAT IF SHE DID FILE FOR CS, THE AMOUNT OF 1111 DOLLARS WAS WHAT HE HAD TO PAY TO HER, WILL THAT AFFECT ME, JUST AS IF SHE HAD FILE FOR CS? OR DOES THIS NOT REALLY MATTER?
i know this all sounds really selfish, but this man has not even given our daughter a single penny, or me seeing my condision. PLEASE LET ME KNOW LEGAL ANS TO THIS ASAP. i am so desperate that i would really like to know. thank you really much for taking the time to read all this, have a nice day. I guess he better get an extra job then.

First he is still married, has other kids, and can't take care of this unborn child, Hmmm.....Sounds to me someone was using the wrong head for this situation. :rolleyes: