long story, short: :mad: :( :confused:
my ex after a child support order was issued followed the visitation until 1996 of every other week end with our 2 kids (now ages 24 & 20) In 2002 took me to court where the original order was set in NY (orange county), and emancipated our oldest. He(ex) then stated he did not live in Missouri and was just visiting due to health reasons, when I just recently did a back-ground check and since 1996 he resided in Missouri, and filed his taxes out of NY. the order was modified in 2002 for CS in arrears and to continue for my youngest until she was 21. He has recently filed for a new modification to have all arrears and present support to be sent directly to our youngest, who he stated in the petition that she moved from my home in 2002 ; when in fact just got her own apartment in Dec of 2005. What is to happen to my arrears and what about after emancipating our oldest in 2002 he paid 10 months of his rent and 100.00/ month on account for him while he was in jail, and did not pay me CS? And what about the extra expence I had while i had the kids on his weekends?

child support is suppost to be for the kids right? So if he is having it directly paid to the daughter , I don't see nothing wrong with that. She can use it for what she needs.

But what about the 10,000 that is owed to me in arrears and the lack of medical for my daughter. I'm all for her getting what should go to her

But what about the 10,000 that is owed to me in arrears and the lack of medical for my daughter. I'm all for her getting what should go to her


they are all grown and on their own you've done a good job taking care of them besides their dead beat dad. let it go, seems like you'll have more heart ache trying to get him to do what he never did anyway.

Sorry But I Don't Know If You Can Just Throw Away 10,000 I Am Not Made Of That Kinda $$$$ Have Three Younger Kids And Only Work 22.5 Hours/week

Sorry But I Don't Know If You Can Just Throw Away 10,000 I Am Not Made Of That Kinda $$$$ Have Three Younger Kids And Only Work 22.5 Hours/week
I'm a little confused,

The original CS order was in NY, correct?

Was the order moved to Missouri (where ex apparently lives) or was it moved to NC (where you apparently live)?

What did the original order state as to at what age CS should end?

In 2002 was an arrearage "established" (set) by court order? If so, was a set amount of monthly payments on arrears ordered? If so, have the arrears payments been made by ex according to the court order?

Did your ex get a court order already to be able to pay the child (oldest) directly?

Although it may be your ex's fault that he owes arrears, it certainly is NOT his fault that you decided to have 3 more children, nor is it his fault that you work only 22 hrs a week.

The truth is that legally your 3 youngest children are NOT your ex's concern, he is only responsible for his own children. In some states the fact that you have subsequent children that he owes nothing to, can actually be used by him as a legitiment defense to not have to pay arrears TO YOU.

Your ex's children no longer live with you and from what you've posted, you are no longer having to support them, so it is understandable that he has filed for a modification. He will not be able to have the modification go back earlier than the filing date, which apparently came after his youngest moved out. So as long as the filing date was after moving, it doesn't matter what date he claims she moved.

The laws are different in each state concerning CS, emancipation, modifications, so before I can offer much help it will help to know what state the order is in.
Xena :)

the original order was set in NY and was a permanent order until the youngest was to turn 21. The oldest was emancipated while in his 2nd year of college just so my ex wouldn't have to pay half the tuition as set in the order. The youngest is about to be 21 and he went back to NY for 5 weeks just to get a jump on filing to stop/reduce CS payments. And about the other children, no your right it not my ex's obligation but, unless my present husband was able to adopt my daughter(the one about to be 21) at age 11 months then we wouldn't have this problem. He's done everything for her like she was his own but what her father doesn't realize is that he OWES, he opened a can of worms now it's time to eat them

But what about the 10,000 that is owed to me in arrears and the lack of medical for my daughter. I'm all for her getting what should go to her

"He has recently filed for a new modification to have all arrears and present support to be sent directly to our youngest, who he stated in the petition that she moved from my home in 2002 ; when in fact just got her own apartment in Dec of 2005."

hes filing a petition to have it go to her? isnt that what you want?

"He has recently filed for a new modification to have all arrears and present support to be sent directly to our youngest, who he stated in the petition that she moved from my home in 2002 ; when in fact just got her own apartment in Dec of 2005."

hes filing a petition to have it go to her? isnt that what you want?
Good point, why is OP upset when she's getting what she claims she wants- for her daughter (not herself) to get what is owed to the daughter. ;)
Xena

I think she is talking about repayment of the arrears that are owed from the years she was raising her daughter alone with no financial help. What needs to happen (somehow) is that the arrearages owed should be ordered to be paid to the mom while the remaining current child support should be modified to be paid directly to the daughter.

I think she is talking about repayment of the arrears that are owed from the years she was raising her daughter alone with no financial help. What needs to happen (somehow) is that the arrearages owed should be ordered to be paid to the mom while the remaining current child support should be modified to be paid directly to the daughter.

support is for the children

yes, support is for the children. The father did not pay his share of the support, the mother picked up his share to support the children, now the father owes the mother the money he did not pay while the child was growing up. That's why it is called arrears. Had he paid the support he owed in the past, then there would be no issue other than the modification to have the support go directly to the child. For whatever reason, he did not pay and now owes the person who took care of his share.