I live in the state of Indiana and I have a question about how much notice does a non custodial parent have to give before he can just show up on my door demanding to see his daughter. He hasnt seen her since the end of October of 2005 when he politely told me in front of a police officer that he wasnt going to get her anymore. I was wondering if he could just show up and say that he wants visitation without notice. Our court order says visitation should not be less than the Indiana Parental Guidelines. But it does not say anything about how much of a notice a parent should give I have read it from front to back a hundred times and I cannot find anything. Can someone please help me on this. I'm afraid hes going to take me back to court and try saying that he tried to get his visitation and I wasnt home. My attorney told me not to worry cause he had stated in front of a police officer that he did not want to get her anymore if I was going to go by the guidelines. Can someone please answer my question for me.

I live in the state of Indiana and I have a question about how much notice does a non custodial parent have to give before he can just show up on my door demanding to see his daughter. He hasnt seen her since the end of October of 2005 when he politely told me in front of a police officer that he wasnt going to get her anymore. I was wondering if he could just show up and say that he wants visitation without notice. Our court order says visitation should not be less than the Indiana Parental Guidelines. But it does not say anything about how much of a notice a parent should give I have read it from front to back a hundred times and I cannot find anything. Can someone please help me on this. I'm afraid hes going to take me back to court and try saying that he tried to get his visitation and I wasnt home. My attorney told me not to worry cause he had stated in front of a police officer that he did not want to get her anymore if I was going to go by the guidelines. Can someone please answer my question for me.

Since your court order states that visitation is by the guidelines, you HAVE TO follow them. I don't know if there is anything in them about notice, but here is a link to the guidelines http://www.in.gov/judiciary/rules/parenting/

Your attorney gave you bad advice, it doesn't matter what he said or who he said it in front of. Legally, the order is to be followed until a Judge changes it. So, as long as you are following the guidelines to a tee, you cannnot get into trouble.
Xena :)

I have followed guidelines to a tee, the day that my daughters father said he wouldnt get her anymore I was following them and the officer was going to inforce them is why he said he wouldnt see her anymore. Its been since October since he has seen her and I was wondering should he have to call first before he wants to see her again or does he have the right to show up on my doorstep demanding to see her without notification. I have documented every weekend missed, every holiday, and her birthday. Shouldnt he have to call first since its been so long or do I sit here and wait every other weekend like I have been doing.

I have followed guidelines to a tee, the day that my daughters father said he wouldnt get her anymore I was following them and the officer was going to inforce them is why he said he wouldnt see her anymore. Its been since October since he has seen her and I was wondering should he have to call first before he wants to see her again or does he have the right to show up on my doorstep demanding to see her without notification. I have documented every weekend missed, every holiday, and her birthday. Shouldnt he have to call first since its been so long or do I sit here and wait every other weekend like I have been doing.

No, techinically he doesn't have to call first. the visitation is set, so there isn't a question about when it is. However, since he is unpredictable and has not exercised visitation for a while, it is easy to see why you may not sit around waiting for him and would appreciate a call in advance. If he does show up unannounced on his correct visitation time, he can call the police, but he will be unprepared if he doesn't have a copy of his visitation order with him and its possible an officer won't enforce it if he can't prove that it is his visitation time. This happened to a friend of mine whose ex hadn't been taking visitation for a while, he showed up on a holiday that was supposed to be his with an officer. My friend explained the situation (how the ex showed up unannounced and hadn't been taking visitation) and the officer did not enforce it because he did not have a copy of a visitation order stating that he had rights to that holiday.

No, techinically he doesn't have to call first. the visitation is set, so there isn't a question about when it is. However, since he is unpredictable and has not exercised visitation for a while, it is easy to see why you may not sit around waiting for him and would appreciate a call in advance. If he does show up unannounced on his correct visitation time, he can call the police, but he will be unprepared if he doesn't have a copy of his visitation order with him and its possible an officer won't enforce it if he can't prove that it is his visitation time. This happened to a friend of mine whose ex hadn't been taking visitation for a while, he showed up on a holiday that was supposed to be his with an officer. My friend explained the situation (how the ex showed up unannounced and hadn't been taking visitation) and the officer did not enforce it because he did not have a copy of a visitation order stating that he had rights to that holiday.
Sorry shedo, that really isn't the best advice to give someone. As long as the court order exists, it HAS to be followed by the CP- period. Like you, I can understand how and why the CP would be upset, however, denying visitation at ANY time for ANY reason can get the CP into trouble.

In a situation like this poster's, the CP has only 1 OBLIGATION- that is to allow visit no matter how long since last visit. The CP does have a legal CHOICE on the problem- the CP can petition the court to modify visitation and have it put into court order that NCP must call within blank number of hours. I agree with virtually all of your advice, but I don't agree with your advice to this poster, sorry.
Xena

Sorry shedo, that really isn't the best advice to give someone. As long as the court order exists, it HAS to be followed by the CP- period. Like you, I can understand how and why the CP would be upset, however, denying visitation at ANY time for ANY reason can get the CP into trouble.

In a situation like this poster's, the CP has only 1 OBLIGATION- that is to allow visit no matter how long since last visit. The CP does have a legal CHOICE on the problem- the CP can petition the court to modify visitation and have it put into court order that NCP must call within blank number of hours. I agree with virtually all of your advice, but I don't agree with your advice to this poster, sorry.
Xena

You are right. Legally it probably wasn't the best advice, sorry. Emotionally, being a mother, I sometimes will give advice that taking the matter into your owns hands has risks, but knowing what the risks are, sometimes its worth it. That's what i would do to protect my child, but since every situation is different, you're right, following the law exactly is always the best advice. In my friends case that I described, she took the risk and it was best for the child, but clearly it won't always work out that way.

Thank you Xena and Shedo for the advice. I will continue to stay home on his scheduled visitation and see if he shows up and when he doesnt I will continue to document every weekend he doesnt show up, that way if he ever does take me back to court I will at least have that documentation. I just dont think that its right for me to get my three year old ready and then he doesnt show up at all. Once again thank you.

I think that you missed the point that you can file for a modification to add that he must give prior notice of his visits. That way you are not obligated to just sit around and wait and get your child ready.