adoptadad@aol.com (AdoptaDad) wrote in message news:<20031014100239.15436.00000782@mb-m23.aol.com>...Subject: Re: Who's on First.... The question of medicaid for mothers.From: sarallewellyn@gosympatico.ca (Rhiannon)Date: 10/13/2003 10:10 PM Eastern Daylight TimeMessage-id: <dafc70.0310131810.7862a301@posting.google.com> < snip >Maybe I didn't make it clear, but I'm talking about people who, ontheir own initiative, express the desire to parent.I look at it this way.There's retrospective responsibility, for what we've done or failed todo, for our actions and omissions.Given that a baby is a 'done deed' (however it was concieved),although the retrospective part is important, the emphasis now shiftsto prospective responsibility. Agreed.So, if a person who's not an entire dingbat sincerely wants to takeparental responsibility for their child, and that person looks to be(without prejudice) a fair bet, then, IMO, they merit encouragementand support. Absolutely. Conversely, foster care is full of children who have been born to parents who have repeatedly proven themselves to be unfit. (Julia gave one example of a mother who had 6 children removed from her care by the state - and took home her 7th baby.) My son's biological mother had at least 2 other children removed by the state before they terminated her parental rights for a third time (after he spent five years in foster care).



You are right, Dad. You've taken my point. I take yours and Julia's.
It's just that sometimes these distinctions get a little lost on alt.
a, and it doesn't hurt to get back onto common ground now and again.
(not but what I don't have a predilection for mud-slinging, of course)

My husband's cousin, a social worker in Clapham (London, U.K), works
with drug addicted women and their children. She has expressed
tremendous frustration with the fact that many of these women continue
to bear children, and struggle to hold onto them even though they are
often incapable of caring for them (and some are beyond caring whether
they care or not!)

I know this sounds a little harsh, but such parents (dads included) shouldn't get multiple chances to abuse and/or neglect their kids. At the very least, they should be counselled towards relinquishment. For the most egregious cases, I would support sterilization for repeat offenders.


Like how, 'most egregious'?
Who'll evaluate and how?


We chemically castrate men who have repeatedly raped and/or molested children. But offer state sanctioned sterilization for women who have repeatedly abused, neglected, and/or otherwise failed to protect their children and all hell breaks loose.


I'll sleep on that nightmarish proposal if you don't mind.
It requires an emotional distance that I can't yet manage to put
between my gut reaction and the idea itself.


Rh.




Dad