Ive been with this man 9 years and on mothers day he admitting to cheating on me, something i thought was sacred and that i thought was mine and never be taken away from me, has been gone. He told me my feelings were cold and noumb, ive never felt this kind of hurt befor in my life, we have three kids together includeing my five month old. I do give it to him for telling me. But now all i think about is him seeing her and talking to her(heworkswithher) I told him i didnt want him leaveing and i dont want to leave i love him with all my heart. but i cant get it off my mind. what do i do :(

I have been there only he did not tell me out of the goodness of his heart. He had a timing mishap on fathers day 2003 and was late getting home with the other woman when I was supposed to be picking him up...needless to say it was a nightmare and his way of handling her seeing me was to call my cell phone and tell me who he was with and that he loved her not me. I fainted in his parents driveway and barfed for a week straight. On day seven of not speaking to him he came back and has been back ever since. She was a foul maniacal witch cheating on her spouse. (this was only my boyfriend) After much deliberation we continued to talk and now it is 2005. It is hard and sometimes I get that glazed look in my eyes and he knows what my mind is wandering to. My mom says that since I chose to stay I can not use that against him all the time. So that is my advice to you. Push it out of your head if you have chosen to stay and try to start again. If you can't then the only fair thing for both of you is to leave...good luck...

Ive been with this man 9 years and on mothers day he admitting to cheating on me, something i thought was sacred and that i thought was mine and never be taken away from me, has been gone. He told me my feelings were cold and noumb, ive never felt this kind of hurt befor in my life, we have three kids together includeing my five month old. I do give it to him for telling me. But now all i think about is him seeing her and talking to her(heworkswithher) I told him i didnt want him leaveing and i dont want to leave i love him with all my heart. but i cant get it off my mind. what do i do :(

I think you're leaving out one important thing here, which is what does he want? If he wants to save the marriage, then you've got a shot at it, but if he doesn't want to...

Sorry about the shock of it all. I guess ffirst you need to know if he wants to save the marriage and if so, try family or marital counseling or pastoral counseling. In the interim, you have to live, so if he has moved out, you need to file for legal separation to legally get spousal support and child support and preferbly have the money sent direct from his pay at work. I know you may be hurting, but with 3 kids you need to be practical too and try to keep clear headed to meet their needs also.

What goes around comes around

May I point out that this thread is from 2005?