I have full custody of my daughter and i let her stay with her father when i went to korea this is the second time and now he says that she can make her own decisions where she wants to live and won't send her back to me now that i am back home :confused:

Children do not make choices as to where they want to live except in GA until they are 18. I take it by your post that you never changed custody within the courts when you were gone. That being said you obviously still retain custody and have the right to get your child. However, how you do that and what can happen can vary. It's unlikely the police will help you and you would have to take this in front of a judge for contempt. In the same respect, dad could fight and file for custody and have a good chance at receiving it. You obviously have no issue with him parenting. Also depending on the distance there is the issue of school... not to mention this has happened once already. My point is, legally you are in the right currently, but what happens next could be anyone's guess and going through a custody battle you will have the disadvantage. As far as the child's age, with everything else considered her preference may be heard (it won't be the deciding factor) and carry SOME weight.

If you have a court order, go to pick her up and have or call the police to be there as backup to enforce the order. Basically, it is up to the court to decide, not the kid or the parent. I would be aggressive and get the child back in your custody, then pursue contempt against the non-custodial parent for pulling crap like this.