Please Help My Child Is 13 And Lives In Missouri With Her Mom. She Is Always Asking To Move To Florida With Me. Her Mom And Her Are Not Getting Along And I Think They Both Need A Break But Mom Says No. At What Age Can A Child Decide For Herself Where She Wants To Live? My Ex Is Also Getting More Frequent With Smacking My Daughter And I Need To Get Her With Me.

Please Help My Child Is 13 And Lives In Missouri With Her Mom. She Is Always Asking To Move To Florida With Me. Her Mom And Her Are Not Getting Along And I Think They Both Need A Break But Mom Says No. At What Age Can A Child Decide For Herself Where She Wants To Live? My Ex Is Also Getting More Frequent With Smacking My Daughter And I Need To Get Her With Me.

File for a modification of custody. At age 13 the court may listen to the child's wishes, but the decision will be made on what is best for your daughter.

Do you have any proof or documentation of her mother "smacking" her? If so, make sure you bring that issue up.
Xena

Thank You Xena . Unfortunately The Only Proof I Have Is My Daughters Say So. Which Is Good Enough For Me But I Dont Know About For The Courts, I Really Dont Want To Have To Make My Daughter Stand In Court And Have To Choose A Parent. It Would Still Upset Her To Have To Say That To Her Mother. Any Suggestions Would Be Appreciated.

Just her word in a courtroom wouldn't like hold water. However, a school counselor or CPS workers words would be regarded more. As was stated, your daughters wishes can be considered but will not be the deciding factor in custody. Things you have to consider is how long you have been divorced, how long she's lived with mom, has she always lived in Missouri and how much contact and time she's spent with you. Also remember that the court of jurisdiction is the court in which made the last court order.

Thanks Suzy, That Is Kinda What I Figured. The Problem Is My Ex And Her Husband Both Work For The County That All The Papers Are Filed In. Also, She Has Lived With Her Mother For 8 Years And I Only Get Visitation At Christmas For A Couple Of Weeks And Spring Break For A Couple Of Weeks . Plus About A Month In Summer Due To My Ex Keeping Her In All These Dance Classes. Im Pretty Much At My Wits End, I Just Dont Know What To Do.

Thanks Suzy, That Is Kinda What I Figured. The Problem Is My Ex And Her Husband Both Work For The County That All The Papers Are Filed In. Also, She Has Lived With Her Mother For 8 Years And I Only Get Visitation At Christmas For A Couple Of Weeks And Spring Break For A Couple Of Weeks . Plus About A Month In Summer Due To My Ex Keeping Her In All These Dance Classes. Im Pretty Much At My Wits End, I Just Dont Know What To Do.

Well all the things I mentioned above will be considered in a custody change. I have to be honest with you and tell you that I don't agree with children being able to choose custody, especially as teenagers. The only state that gives a child a choice is Georgia and basically that is when both parents are fit.. but again I disagree with it. Teenagers can be pretty manipulative and believe the word "No" or any sort of punishment is 'emotional abuse.' If you keep an eye on this board and other legal advice sites daily there are teenagers claiming 'emotional abuse' in one form or another and how they just can't stand to live at home anymore. I'm not saying it doesn't happen but I just think it's a bad age to give a lot of weight to. If I was 13 I'd want to move to Florida where it's nice and sunny too. I'm not saying that you aren't a good parent or that your ex is wonderful... it's just a matter of looking at all angles.

I Agree I Hate The Thought Of Making A Child Choose Between Two Parents. But My Daughter Has Wanted To Live With Me For Years,even When I Lived In Missouri. So I Dont Think It Is Just The Sunshine And Beaches. Also I Am The One That Raised Her For The First 3 Years While My Ex Worked Weird Hours And Slept Most The Time. So My Daughter And I Are Very Close.

I Have Even Told Her She Doesnt Have To Pay Me Child Support And She Can Still Claim Her On Her Tax Return. She Still Will Not Agree To At Least Give It Try.

I Have Even Told Her She Doesnt Have To Pay Me Child Support And She Can Still Claim Her On Her Tax Return. She Still Will Not Agree To At Least Give It Try.

Problem is, she's not required to agree and right now she has the upper hand on this. You would likely have to prove A. the move is in the best interest of the child and B. mom is unfit without her agreement.

If you think abuse is happening, you can report it to DCF. Otherwise, you can seek modification of custody and the judge can hear the child, but the judge will still make the decision.