I Live in New York State. My problem is I have three children with my ex boyfriend (we were never married) 12 years ago he and I split up and he went to Florida. The kids are 17,16 and 13. Yesterday I started getting phone calls from him stating he wants and has a right to see his kids. For the past 12 years he has not paid not a dime in child support let alone call to check on the kids. He Fouind out that I am now married and he found out the street that I live on and he showed up yesterday asking my son did he know where the -------- family lived. My son said no I don't and he came in the house.Little does this guy know he was talking to his son. I went to the police station and they said there was nothing they could do about it he has every right to see them? Can you please tell me if this is true. One of the times I talked to him he had said he was paying child support. I don't know who he is paying because I never recieved it. He had also said that he was about to get a large setttlement and there was a lean put on it in my name . Will that mean he has to pay all back money to me before he can get the rest of it? Also what are the chances he will get any kind of visitation rights after 12 years of nothing? THanks so much.

First off you will have to be paid before the lein can be removed from his settlement depending on what the settlement is for. If there is a lein put on it then it will probably stay. He has to prove the child support he has paid. Also he should not be able to see the kids without supervision. It is like you are turning them over to a stranger and that is not in the best interest of the children. Judges will usually agree with that. Since he has not seen the kids in 12 years (now that you did all the hard work) there is a good chance he will lose interest.
Also you need to tell you kids that strangers cannot come into the home and to not even open the door to strangers. He was probably scoping out your home to see how you are doing. It is all because now he may be having to pay child support. You can be with him and the kids for visitation in a neutral location. Have another adult go with you. Do not let him have the kids with him alone. You could call DCFS and ask for their opinion and help in this matter. If they are good like they are here they can give you advice or call a women's shelter etc. because they know the ins and outs better. I know you don't need the women's shelter but they handle cases like this. Your ex. has no right to talk to the kids alone because to them he is a stranger. Tell him that you know he wants what is best for the kids so they don't get upset he needs to go through you before he can have contact. Tell him you won't try to keep the kids away from him but right now it is a delicate situation. That must be so hard because he is a stranger and really has not earned the right to be their Dad but legally he is. Good luck!

The lien is probably because of unpaid child support. I suggest going to court and filing for an adjudication of sole custody asap with the father getting onyl supervised visitation given his abandonment of the kids, his threats to kidnap them from you, and the lack of a relationship with the kids. You should have no problem, but until that is in place in theory he has joint parental rights. Go get on it. If you cannot afford an attorney, go look at some forms on legal form websites and do it yourself and maybe consult with an attorney for advice as most offer free consultations.