howdy!! we got quite a story on our hands. so let i really hope all this typing doesn't go in vein!!

there are 3 people in this story:
Juan and Rosa, who work together at a tech help call center and are going out. they have been going out for almost a year and were going out BEFORE they started working there.

Alfredo, a gay guy who also works at the tech help call center. He was introduced to the job by his best female friend who also works there.


In the beginning all 3 co workers got along. they didnt love eachother but they got along farely well... Juan worked graveyard, and Rosa did not, so they didnt nesesarily see eachoher all the time. Alfredo worked swing, so for his first 4 hours he saw Rosa, for his next 4 hours he saw Juan.

Occasionally Rosa would call Juan on her lunch while he is asleep (ask he works graveyard and will have to get up soon), crying saying that Alfredo is being mean to her. Juan consoles her, telling her 'dont listen to him, please' and after 30 min of comforting, she feels better.. This happens multiple times, about 3. Juan just thinks that if he is nice enough to Alfredo, he will realize "hey, im really cool with Juan, maybe I should be nice to his girl too".. well that doesnt work and Alfredo continues to be mean to her...

After a few weeks of this, Rosa is in a terrible car accident, and tells Juan not to tell anyone at work, because she knows for a fact Alfredo will make fun of her and refer to her poor driving skills and ya know, just give a hard time. At this point Juan is angry, he comes into work and approaches Alfredo. He is calm, collected, he does not show any type of rage, as anger doesnt solve anything, what DOES solve things is the willingness to talk things out...

As Juan tells alfred the story, another female co worker listening speaks up and says "I didn't know things we say affected her that much, tell her im sorry and i hope she is okay". expecting to hear something similar from Alfredo, Juan is SHOCKED to hear Alfredo say "Well im sorry if she feels that way, but thats just the way I am. And if she has a problem, she should tell me. Im not going to apologize for anything I 've said."

Juan is a little confused, but as another co worker comes into work and sits next to them, he finished the conversation with "just watch what you say please, alright" again he is not hostile, but calm and willing to solve the problem, as opposed to Alfredo who feels attacked and has a cocky (and femininely gay) attitude in his statements. Juan ended the conversation when another co worker came in, to prevent the spreado f the situation. He wanted it to remain between the 2 guys. Well, Juan started to read a book and began to doze off, which is easy to do at the call center during graveyward as no one calls for tech support at 1 AM.

As Juan was asleep, Alfredo proceeds to tell the story to the girl who just came in. Then, because he still things Juan is asleep, he proceeds to tell every person that comes in! However he changed the story a little...

According to Alfredo, Juan was a wimp, he was scared, never made eye contact, and stuttered. He also proceeded to say that if anyone has a problem with him, to tell him to his face; dont send your boyfriend to talk to him.

Apparently he was under the assumption that Rosa told Juan to talk to him about the subject. wich is not true..

Juan is a peaceful guy, and lets him spread the story. What happend between them two guys, should stay between them two guys. Rumos continue to spread. Next thing Juan knows, there is a written statement against him, written by Alfredo, and Juan is now forced to talk to Head Management (higher then regular management, they have the power to fire on the spot) about what happend. HM hears Juan's side of the story, and says "perhaps you two can solve this on your own on a break or something, because it seems like Alfredo is willing to solve this too".

"Very well", Juan thinks to himself. "Maybe we can settle this like men." On a day off, Juan takes it upon himself to call Alfredo, and offer to 'bury the hatchet'.

"Hello?"
"Hi Alfredo, this is Juan"
"Juan who?"
"Juan...from work"
"oh. What do YOU want?"
"I was wondering if you would like to end all this, you respect me and Rosa, we respect you, just forget it all."
"WHAT? WHO do you think you ARE? Im busy and I don't have time top deal with this. you go around spreading all these one sided rumors about what happend. then you proceed to make a written statement against me, and now you think you can just..... ugh.. Im not gonna talk to you without a Head Management manager present."
"dude, Im not trying to get you or anybody fired! I just want to solve this. HM said we should set up a time to talk about it, i thought you would want to talk about it now. thats all"
"Im soooo pissed right now, and then i heard you tell people who dont even work there anymore about this????"
"Exactly, because THEY DONT WORK THERE. your best friend STILL works there.. look if you dont want to talk now, then cant we set up a date to talk about this in from of HM?"
"I dont know. Im busy."
"uuhh..."
"maybe next week. just I cant believe... what gives you the RIGHT to call me on my cell phone and bother me. Im very busy right now I dont need to talk"
"..... alright... sorry I bothered you"
"CLICK!"

Juan goes to work later that night, still a little confused about why Alfredo Exploded at him, especially when all Juan had to offer was an olive branch of peace. When he gets to work, everything seems to be questioning him about the phone call. apparently everyone knows....

On top of that, Alfredo is now looking into filing a harassment case, because Juan called Alfredo, and that phone call classifies as harassment.


Is this true??? I looked up harassment in the dictionary, apparently it reads
1.To irritate or torment persistently.
2.To wear out; exhaust.
3.To impede and exhaust (an enemy) by repeated attacks or raids

This does not define the single, isolated phone call at all. Plus he could have always hung up. Im just wondering here whom do you think is right here? does Alfredo REALLY have a case for anything?? is there anything Juan can do to fight back and protect his job?? what did the wrong things here?? 'Juan' would really like to know before its too late...

thanks

First of all, I'm not sure what state you are in. You say that Alfredo wants to file a charge of harassment against Juan. It was implied that it is because Alfredo is gay. California protects sexual orientation but most of the other states don't.

Illegal harassment, from the standpoint of employment law, is defined as a pattern of discrimination on the basis of an legally protected status, such as race, religion, age, national origin, disability, etc. Or, it could be a single act that is so heinous that any reasonable person would see it as harassment, such as a rape. A single phone call probably would not be seen as harassment.

My suggestion for Juan and Rosa is this....steer clear of Alfredo. Don't talk to him, about him, etc., except in normal business communications. Alfredo is trying to escalate the situation. The two of them need to appear business like. It will become obvious to all, over time, that Alfredo is the person causing the issues. Rosa should possibly request to move to another job, if there is one that is available for her skills, etc. She should not go into why, etc., so as not to fall into the dramatics. As I said, it's important that Juan and Rosa steer clear of Alfredo. Falling into his trap of escalation will only cause problems for all three.

Let me know if you have any other questions.

By the way, if you're not in a location that protects persons of a different sexual orientation, Juan could still run into trouble trying to pursue Alfredo; not under employment laws but under any stalking or other criminal laws that may be in existance in your area.

The adult thing to do is to rise about it.

thanks, 'juan' really wasnt sure what to do. Okay so Alfredo makes working there a living hell because of the way he spreads all kinds of rumors about how 'juan' is a jerk when in truth its the other way around. Hopefully in time people will see the truth. thanks again! appreciate it!