I am in a very bitter and contentious situation that has taken a huge emotional tole on my now 7 y/o DD. My ex & I never married (were on the verge of engagement until pregnancy), he took off after we found out I was pregnant. I thought we were, at one point, getting back together until I discovered he had another g/f. They are now married and the resentment this woman still carries toward me is overwhelming.

I have utilized counseling services to rectify our situation to no avail. They refuse to take any responsibility for their actions and blame everything on me. They continue to put my daughter in the middle of their attempted power struggles with me.

He has done everything from filing repeated false abuse charges through children and youth, to claiming I tampered w/his wifes car and even filed false forgery charges to prove his lie to his wife that he never co-signed for my school loans!

They constantly emotionally abuse my child, they manipulate her little mind which makes her come home from their visits a very angry little girl. He refuses to see the effect his actions have on our child! And I am fed up with seeing the pain they cause her and that she has to come home and release all her anger on me because over their she isn't entitled to her feelings!

I cant afford to keep filing contempt charges (which previoulsy have been upheld against them) each time they dont allow our phone calls, or when they dont allow her to attend extra curricular activities as per the court order.

I have numerous witness, counselors to speak on my behalf and testify to their witnessing of their inappropriate behaviors. I would like to keep her father and her step-family in her life as they are very important to her but I am afraid they are not healthy for her to be around.

He was ordered to attend a co parenting co ordinator with me and to pay for psych evaluations for determination of custody but has, as usual, refused to co - operate with these orders as well. I don't have the money, or I would gladly pay for these myself !!!

Outside of my daily prayers for a monetary windfall so I can get this resolved what can/should I do at this point.

Gather the paper trail, and ask this question to the Judge at your next meeting. Keep your voice calm.

You mentioned counselors.... is your daughter seeing a therapist of her own, regularly?

If not, this is one approach you should look into. Either through private insurance or your state if necessary - get her into regular counseling. Not only is it good for her - to help her work through the anger issues, etc. it is also to YOUR benefit legally......... Child therapists make good witnesses.... Especially if they are licensed social workers/psychologists.

This can also help you determine just how detrimental their affect on your daughter is - or if it can be handled through good therapy to help her adjust.

God Bless!
Amy

You mentioned counselors.... is your daughter seeing a therapist of her own, regularly?


She is not currently seeing anyone and I am unsure if going back to counseling is the answear anymore. We started with individual thereapy and it was she who recommended the home based thereapy that came to see my child in both homes. Her reasoning was, as she had worked with both parents and his side was very uncooperative to her suggestions-insisting on laying all blame on me, that she could only continue to help P with dealing/working through her feelings on things that had already occurred. Her hope was home based could get things to a point where we were co operative with each other and avoid any turmoil for P caused by our fighting.

Which failed miserable as they continued/still do to lay all blame/responsibility on me for everything. Never co-operated with the therepists and made allegations against them when they no longer wanted them to even come to their home.

So I am really at a loss, or more like a standstill as to what to do from here, without money for the legal precedings that I need to get rolling, my baby is forced to suffer (as well as I) and I can't stand not being able to end it for her and feel like a failure as her mother sometimes because of this . . . .