elle17
05-31-2008, 06:31 PM
I just wanted to quickly talk about my situation and ask if this is "normal" advice a lawyer would give:
I am 23 years old. I dated my 32 yr old boyfriend for almost a year when I found out I was pregnant. At first everything was fine, then 2 weeks ago we got into a fight (over something his roomate did, including the fact he was chainsmoking around me, and my boyfriend wasn't asking him to stop, standing up for me, etc). We ended up breaking up over this. I'm currently 15 weeks pregnant and my ex and I had not been in contact for 2 weeks until I called him Tuesday telling him he needed to get bloodwork done (my Dr. needs to see if he is a carrier for a certain genetic disorder). When I spoke with him he told me he wanted me to know he wanted to be part of the baby's life, come to all my doctor's appointments with me etc etc. He also stated that he was consulting with a lawyer later that afternoon so he could "know his rights as a father to be". I had no problem with that. I ended up calling him later that evening and he told me he could no longer have contact with me, his lawyer advised him not to have any communication or contact with me until after the baby was born, and a paternity test was done because his lawyer said "you can never be 100% sure that the baby is actually yours." I was completley shocked by his change of attitude and the fact hours prior he was telling me how he wanted an active part in the pregnancy, then after talking to a lawyer his tune totally changed. There is no doubt this child is his (he knows this as well, we spent almost every day together, and I am not the cheating type). He said he was advised to tell me that if I needed to get in touch with him or needed to come after him for child support, to have my lawyer go through his lawyer. I was so unbeleiveably shocked and hurt by this. I've never felt so alone in my life. We were going to go through this together, as a team, whether we were a couple or not, and be there for the baby. Now his lawyer is telling him not to contact me until after the child is here and paternity is 100% confirmed?! I just cannot beleive this! Is this normal advice a lawyer would give? I just don't even know what to do. Any thoughts or advice are much appreciated. Thank you!
I am 23 years old. I dated my 32 yr old boyfriend for almost a year when I found out I was pregnant. At first everything was fine, then 2 weeks ago we got into a fight (over something his roomate did, including the fact he was chainsmoking around me, and my boyfriend wasn't asking him to stop, standing up for me, etc). We ended up breaking up over this. I'm currently 15 weeks pregnant and my ex and I had not been in contact for 2 weeks until I called him Tuesday telling him he needed to get bloodwork done (my Dr. needs to see if he is a carrier for a certain genetic disorder). When I spoke with him he told me he wanted me to know he wanted to be part of the baby's life, come to all my doctor's appointments with me etc etc. He also stated that he was consulting with a lawyer later that afternoon so he could "know his rights as a father to be". I had no problem with that. I ended up calling him later that evening and he told me he could no longer have contact with me, his lawyer advised him not to have any communication or contact with me until after the baby was born, and a paternity test was done because his lawyer said "you can never be 100% sure that the baby is actually yours." I was completley shocked by his change of attitude and the fact hours prior he was telling me how he wanted an active part in the pregnancy, then after talking to a lawyer his tune totally changed. There is no doubt this child is his (he knows this as well, we spent almost every day together, and I am not the cheating type). He said he was advised to tell me that if I needed to get in touch with him or needed to come after him for child support, to have my lawyer go through his lawyer. I was so unbeleiveably shocked and hurt by this. I've never felt so alone in my life. We were going to go through this together, as a team, whether we were a couple or not, and be there for the baby. Now his lawyer is telling him not to contact me until after the child is here and paternity is 100% confirmed?! I just cannot beleive this! Is this normal advice a lawyer would give? I just don't even know what to do. Any thoughts or advice are much appreciated. Thank you!
