(I posted this in the paternity section first. But I think it belongs here).:confused: Sorry.

Hello everyone.

I am 40 years old, a soon to be mother (7 1/2 months pregnant), unmarried, and still friendly with the father even though he lives on the other coast and we broke up about a month prior to me finding out I was pregnant.

I knew he didn't want children and I initially didn't plan on telling him I was pregnant. I was very upset after he broke up with me...but I sent him an email and told him that I planned on keeping the child and I would contact him if the pregnancy went to term (I was still angry).

He telephoned me that very day and told me he would step up and do the right thing (even though he wasn't happy about how I went about things).

The father and I have been trying to work out a parenting agreement without going to court. (I've tried to tell him that it would be easier and less expensive if we just got married. But he broke up with me before I knew I was pregnant and he doesn't show any interest in me...which really makes me sad...).

Anyway, early on, I told him that I want him to see his son. Now we are discussing finances/support.

For him to travel to visit the child will be expensive but he insists on doing so and he says that cost should be deducted from the amount of support I receive!

Maybe I should just tell him that I don't think he needs to fly out here to see his child too often.

Do courts allow this type of transportation deduction?

How often is it reasonable to allow the father to fly out to visit his son?

Thanks.

mommyofm: For my child's father to travel to visit the child will be expensive but he insists on doing so, and he says that cost should be deducted from the amount of support I receive! Do courts allow this type of transportation deduction?

The answer to your question is going to depend on the laws of the state in which you live and the judge assigned to you case.

For example, in California where I practice, all courts generally must adhere to the "statewide uniform child support guideline" formula approach. Simply put, child support is determined via an algebraic formula that takes into account the parents' time sharing arrangement with the child AND each parent' s income and allowable expenses (transportation cost incurred by one parent so he/she can visit the child is not an allowable expense). The judge then "adds on" (not deducts) certain items (e.g., cost of unreimbursed health care, child day care expenses, and transportation cost associated with child visitation).

You really need to consult with a family law in your local area regarding the laws of your state and application of those laws to your particular situation.

BSPCPA, this is a soon to be father posting as the mother because he didn't get the answers he wanted in his original thread.

http://www.LaborLawTalk.com/showthread.php?t=189756

http://www.LaborLawTalk.com/showthread.php?t=189844

So far, the count of multiple identies is up to 3. He also created another identity on his original thread to 'chastise' me because he didn't like it when I called him on his asinine, sexist statement.