Hi there
I am worried to death. I have a grandson who has been in our life since before birth. His mom my daughter stays with us even though she has a home of her own the state housing. Well the father just got out of prison and I am scared to death he will want to come into this boys life. He has three other children and he is only in one of their lives. He has only attempted to see him twice since his birth and that was in between his prison terms for selling drugs. Now since he has gotten out he got married to one of the women he has a baby by and that is great. I hope he won't bother my daughter or my grandson. He doesn't work and has no intention of getting a job from what we have heard. He is not on the birth certificate, but was determined while he was in prison through DNA testing to be the father. My daughter wants me and her to go to a lawyer to get joint custody. Is this something that can be done? If so will this keep him from being in my grandson's life? Please help.
Thanks, Sincerely, Lisa

Hi there
I am worried to death. I have a grandson who has been in our life since before birth. His mom my daughter stays with us even though she has a home of her own the state housing. Well the father just got out of prison and I am scared to death he will want to come into this boys life. He has three other children and he is only in one of their lives. He has only attempted to see him twice since his birth and that was in between his prison terms for selling drugs. Now since he has gotten out he got married to one of the women he has a baby by and that is great. I hope he won't bother my daughter or my grandson. He doesn't work and has no intention of getting a job from what we have heard. He is not on the birth certificate, but was determined while he was in prison through DNA testing to be the father. My daughter wants me and her to go to a lawyer to get joint custody. Is this something that can be done? If so will this keep him from being in my grandson's life? Please help.
Thanks, Sincerely, Lisa

Hi, Lisa...we understand you are worried about your daughter and many folks on this forum can no doubt share similar stories.

Since paternity has been established confirming this man as the father, he does have rights to visitation, should he choose to file for them. Your daughter also has the right to file for child support, but this would likely provoke a reaction from him to demand visitation. The really sticky part of your story is that you said your daughter is receiving housing assistance...in nearly every case, this forces the government to act on its own to attempt child support collection from him to offset the state-provided help.

I would highly suggest speaking to a family law attorney in your state...most have free consultations. Other than that, I would simply "wait it out" for now. I don't believe you will have any standing to be granted joint custody with your daughter, but there may be other options available that an attorney can at least make you aware of.

My best wishes to you through this difficult time...my family and I will remember you and your family in our prayers.

His mom my daughter stays with us even though she has a home of her own the state housing.

Boobatuba has answered the legal portions of your questions, so there's no need to elaborate on good advice.

However, this statement you made concerns me greatly. Many many years ago my husband, children and I were in desperate need of decent afforable housing. We applied at the 2 public housing apts in our area. They had a waiting list that was 3 years long. It was very discouraging because we personally knew of at least 5 tenants who should have been made to move.

Since your daughter is living with you, please ask her to give some consideration to others who need a place but are turned away because there are no vacancies. Your daughter should give up her apt so that some other family who does NOT have any place else to go, can move into her unused apt.