How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful,
and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same,
and how did IT start?

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 13:44:22 GMT, Gummy Joe wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start?

No I haven't been unfaithful but I have been seriously tempted at one point
when things weren't going great and I was away from home. There was a guy
who was a lot like my Husband and clearly up for it. He even came on to me.
In the end I just couldn't do it to my Husband who I love.

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 13:44:22 GMT, "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com>
wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful,and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same,and how did IT start?

I was unfaithful. Started out that my wife and I were having
problems. She seemed not to be interested in me and for awhile I
tried to make things work. Eventually I found myself confiding in
someone else, I developed feelings for this person, and eventually, we
started doing things that violated my marriage vowels. My wife
eventually found out and after counseling and serious conversations
about ending our marriage, she forgave me (I sometimes think she's
still working with this) and we've moved on.

--Brian

I sometimes joke that since I cannot remember names very well, I
cannot cheat on my wife with any woman who has a different name.

Seriously speaking, if you are asking for personal experience, we've
been married for almost 5 yrs and I have no interest in cheating, so
far.

i

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 13:44:22 GMT, Gummy Joe <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote: How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start?


--

Gummy Joe <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start?

I was emotionally unfathful to my first husband. It started because I
was lonely and got sloppy.

Gummy Joe wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been
unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the
same, and how did IT start?

It's not technically infidelity because we're poly, but i have been intimate
with someone other than my spouse.

--
little one
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Darling, a true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her
whorish best, at all other times you can be as modest and dignified as your
persona requires." --Lazarus Long

Gummy Joe <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote:
"Emma Anne" <mbjq@earthlink.net> wrote in message news:1gn33kk.qs9us01ld1udrN%mbjq@earthlink.net... Gummy Joe <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote: How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start? I was emotionally unfathful to my first husband. It started because I was lonely and got sloppy. Wow. Elaborate, if you could.

I had an emotional affair. I let myself fall in love with someone else
and share the thoughts and emotions and closeness that my H should have
been getting. Ick. It's not fun remembering.

"Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message
news:W0Kkd.51038$Jb.1986807@twister.southeast.rr.c om... How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start?

IT started shortly after I began working with a woman that I was extremely
physically to. She openly, and actively pursued me until I could no longer
resist her. I did hold her off for a while but she was relentless. Her
pursuit of me cost her her job and her own marriage but that didn't stop
her. She is still pursuing me a year and a ½ later, after I have already
reconciled with my wife.

So for me, it had nothing to do with my spouse. It wasn't about what she
was or wasn't doing for me.. I was weak and couldn't escape the
temptations of the other woman. I couldn't put my foot down firmly enough
to make her stop probably because deep down I didn't want her to because I
was so physically attracted to her. My wife is very physically attractive
to me too.. I can't say I'd be able to fight my wife off either under
those circumstances.

Bad thing is, if I get myself in that situation again, I don't know what I
would do differently. I tried everything and failed before.

"Carver Lee" <carverlee@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:%7Skd.29714$Al3.22357@newssvr30.news.prodigy. com... "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message news:W0Kkd.51038$Jb.1986807@twister.southeast.rr.c om... How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start? IT started shortly after I began working with a woman that I was extremely physically to. She openly, and actively pursued me until I could no longer resist her. I did hold her off for a while but she was relentless. Her pursuit of me cost her her job and her own marriage but that didn't stop her. She is still pursuing me a year and a ½ later, after I have already reconciled with my wife. So for me, it had nothing to do with my spouse. It wasn't about what she was or wasn't doing for me.. I was weak and couldn't escape the temptations of the other woman. I couldn't put my foot down firmly enough to make her stop probably because deep down I didn't want her to because I was so physically attracted to her. My wife is very physically attractive to me too.. I can't say I'd be able to fight my wife off either under those circumstances. Bad thing is, if I get myself in that situation again, I don't know what I would do differently. I tried everything and failed before.


Here's a question:

Could anyone, male or female, under the same circumstance as you, REALLY be
faithful?

Someone physically attractive appears in our lives, opens all the right
doors with all the right keys, and makes their intentions known. Does not
relent. Keeps up the pressure. I think most people would break. Because I
doubt even our spouses attacked with such utter single-mindedness.

On Fri, 12 Nov 2004 01:32:15 GMT, Gummy Joe wrote:
"Carver Lee" <carverlee@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:%7Skd.29714$Al3.22357@newssvr30.news.prodigy. com... "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message news:W0Kkd.51038$Jb.1986807@twister.southeast.rr.c om... How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start? IT started shortly after I began working with a woman that I was extremely physically to. She openly, and actively pursued me until I could no longer resist her. I did hold her off for a while but she was relentless. Her pursuit of me cost her her job and her own marriage but that didn't stop her. She is still pursuing me a year and a ½ later, after I have already reconciled with my wife. So for me, it had nothing to do with my spouse. It wasn't about what she was or wasn't doing for me.. I was weak and couldn't escape the temptations of the other woman. I couldn't put my foot down firmly enough to make her stop probably because deep down I didn't want her to because I was so physically attracted to her. My wife is very physically attractive to me too.. I can't say I'd be able to fight my wife off either under those circumstances. Bad thing is, if I get myself in that situation again, I don't know what I would do differently. I tried everything and failed before. Here's a question: Could anyone, male or female, under the same circumstance as you, REALLY be faithful? Someone physically attractive appears in our lives, opens all the right doors with all the right keys, and makes their intentions known. Does not relent. Keeps up the pressure. I think most people would break. Because I doubt even our spouses attacked with such utter single-mindedness.

The Guy who pursued me was pretty relentless. Admittedly I was only away
for a week but after I had made my decision that was it. He kept trying
though, I think he knew I desired him. Believe me it was not that I didn't
lust after him either (the guy left me breathless when we were in the same
room and my heart pounded and flesh goosebumped) but I realised that I
didn't want to be with anyone but my Husband.

My first few doubts were because things at home were frankly #### at the
time. We had gone through rounds of arguing and sleeping on the sofa before
I left and I was overtired and stressed. I'm just glad I didn't succumb to
it because it would have been really easy. Luckily by nature I am cautious
and look before I leap with most situations.

I don't know if my response would be typical of most folk or not because I
was only away a week. I'm sure though that I'd have remained faithful no
matter how long because that was my decision.

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 13:44:22 GMT, Gummy Joe wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start?

My Auntie (a.k.a *****face) was unfaithful to my Uncle (biological uncle).
He didn't find out until it was too late. She planned everything first. She
persuaded my Uncle to take out a second mortgage on the house for repairs
etc. She then spent lots of it on herself. Before she left my Uncle she
spent what was left on a car/new house behind his back. Of course to the
lawyer she says they spent the money together on household stuff and have
no receipts and he can't prove it. She took all the best stuff from the
house and left all the crap. While she was with my Uncle she was a lazy pig
and a know-it-all. They rarely cooked and ordered take-out regularly and he
did the cleaning mostly. They both worked equivalent jobs.
Anyway she stripped the place bare and left and it turned out she had been
having an affair for quite some time before she left. I saw the guy and he
was ugly as sin but looked wealthy. Unless she has changed radically I'll
wager she isn't with him for his personality. She is still many years later
trying, through lawyers, to get more money out of my Uncle.

"Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> writes:
"Carver Lee" <carverlee@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:%7Skd.29714$Al3.22357@newssvr30.news.prodigy. com... "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message news:W0Kkd.51038$Jb.1986807@twister.southeast.rr.c om... How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start? IT started shortly after I began working with a woman that I was extremely physically to. She openly, and actively pursued me until I could no longer resist her. I did hold her off for a while but she was relentless. Her pursuit of me cost her her job and her own marriage but that didn't stop her. She is still pursuing me a year and a ½ later, after I have already reconciled with my wife. So for me, it had nothing to do with my spouse. It wasn't about what she was or wasn't doing for me.. I was weak and couldn't escape the temptations of the other woman. I couldn't put my foot down firmly enough to make her stop probably because deep down I didn't want her to because I was so physically attracted to her. My wife is very physically attractive to me too.. I can't say I'd be able to fight my wife off either under those circumstances. Bad thing is, if I get myself in that situation again, I don't know what I would do differently. I tried everything and failed before. Here's a question: Could anyone, male or female, under the same circumstance as you, REALLY be faithful?

Of course they could.
Someone physically attractive appears in our lives, opens all the right doors with all the right keys, and makes their intentions known. Does not relent. Keeps up the pressure. I think most people would break. Because I doubt even our spouses attacked with such utter single-mindedness.

There may well be circumstances which would "break" me, but these
aren't them.

"Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message
news:zoUkd.54479$hr3.2325942@twister.southeast.rr. com... "Carver Lee" <carverlee@yahoo.com> wrote in message news:%7Skd.29714$Al3.22357@newssvr30.news.prodigy. com... "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com> wrote in message news:W0Kkd.51038$Jb.1986807@twister.southeast.rr.c om... How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful, and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same, and how did IT start? IT started shortly after I began working with a woman that I was
extremely physically to. She openly, and actively pursued me until I could no
longer resist her. I did hold her off for a while but she was relentless. Her pursuit of me cost her her job and her own marriage but that didn't stop her. She is still pursuing me a year and a ½ later, after I have already reconciled with my wife. So for me, it had nothing to do with my spouse. It wasn't about what she was or wasn't doing for me.. I was weak and couldn't escape the temptations of the other woman. I couldn't put my foot down firmly
enough to make her stop probably because deep down I didn't want her to because
I was so physically attracted to her. My wife is very physically
attractive to me too.. I can't say I'd be able to fight my wife off either under those circumstances. Bad thing is, if I get myself in that situation again, I don't know what
I would do differently. I tried everything and failed before. Here's a question: Could anyone, male or female, under the same circumstance as you, REALLY
be faithful? Someone physically attractive appears in our lives, opens all the right doors with all the right keys, and makes their intentions known. Does not relent. Keeps up the pressure. I think most people would break. Because I doubt even our spouses attacked with such utter single-mindedness.

Yes. There are people who could walk away from those circumstances.

On Thu, 11 Nov 2004 13:44:22 GMT, "Gummy Joe" <gofish@nc.rr.com>
wrote:
How many of you (change your posting name if you like) have been unfaithful,and how did it start? How many have had wives or husbands who did the same,and how did IT start?

First marriage. About 6 months after I was married, and it lasted
over 4 years. It was someone I met at a social event, and just
someone I felt very comfortable with. Ironically, that wasn't the end
of my marriage, or at least not until I admitted when I figured out he
was stepping out about 4 years into the marriage. I figured if we
were both doing it, we may as well be open about it and have an open
marriage. He was floored when I told him the truth (he had no clue).

I've honestly never considered doing the same with Blue. I'm not the
same person, or maybe I am but understand myself better. I do fall in
love at the drop of the a hat, it's just the way I'm wired. I just
acknowledge it now, and no longer act on it. I now know the
difference between falling in love, and being in love. Falling in
love is fleeting, being in love is a constant that grows daily.

Tara