I will try and make this short My husband has 2 sons 10 and 8 he and his wife divorced 6 years ago and had an extremely violatile relationship. He has not seen his sons in 6 years. His wife died 11 months ago and he recently found out. Grandparents did not make an attempt to contact my husband My husband and the grandparents are now battling custody. Going through mediation. Grandparents stated children were afraid but finally after mediation my husband got to spend the weekend with them. It was a great and wonderful weekend and the children acted as though they had known their father all of their lives as though not a moment missed. My husband was truly happy however we can tell that the grandparents are making sure that the kids dont get to close with their father because they dont want to lose them. Does my husband have the right as their father to remove them from the grandparents home. Please keep in mind the grandparents have not been given custody nor do they have emergency or temporary custody. The court has not established this. does he have any kind of rights he has always paid child support. As I mentioned - very hateful relationship with wife- not by him but her. She refused to let him see the boys and moved 8 times to prevent him from finding her.

I will try and make this short My husband has 2 sons 10 and 8 he and his wife divorced 6 years ago and had an extremely violatile relationship. He has not seen his sons in 6 years. His wife died 11 months ago and he recently found out. Grandparents did not make an attempt to contact my husband My husband and the grandparents are now battling custody. Going through mediation. Grandparents stated children were afraid but finally after mediation my husband got to spend the weekend with them. It was a great and wonderful weekend and the children acted as though they had known their father all of their lives as though not a moment missed. My husband was truly happy however we can tell that the grandparents are making sure that the kids dont get to close with their father because they dont want to lose them. Does my husband have the right as their father to remove them from the grandparents home. Please keep in mind the grandparents have not been given custody nor do they have emergency or temporary custody. The court has not established this. does he have any kind of rights he has always paid child support. As I mentioned - very hateful relationship with wife- not by him but her. She refused to let him see the boys and moved 8 times to prevent him from finding her.

Does your husband have ANY visitation/custody papers? He should in all rights have FULL custody now, unless there are some pre-existing papers removing his custody.

he did have visitation but his ex made sure he couldnt exercise it by moving. I will say my husband was very foolish because he really hoped she would come around and he would eventually get to see them. When I met my husband I pushed him to pursue the matter. Every time he spoke with her she promised to let him see the kids and then at the last minute canceled and then magically her phone got number was changed. Her parents have always disliked my husband and going to them would not have made a diffence in the world

he did have visitation but his ex made sure he couldnt exercise it by moving. I will say my husband was very foolish because he really hoped she would come around and he would eventually get to see them. When I met my husband I pushed him to pursue the matter. Every time he spoke with her she promised to let him see the kids and then at the last minute canceled and then magically her phone got number was changed. Her parents have always disliked my husband and going to them would not have made a diffence in the world

Then take the visitation/custody papers and have him go pick up his children.

ahhh that is what he wanted to do but the grandparents wont let him. The maryland state police do not get involved in matters such as this. an oddly enough a judge is allowing this case to move forward rather than stating that my husband has the right to get them. I find that disturbing because I feel if she is allowing the case to move forward then he will not have custody. My husband only had visitation to start with. His ex had full custody at the time of their divorce.

ahhh that is what he wanted to do but the grandparents wont let him. The maryland state police do not get involved in matters such as this. an oddly enough a judge is allowing this case to move forward rather than stating that my husband has the right to get them. I find that disturbing because I feel if she is allowing the case to move forward then he will not have custody. My husband only had visitation to start with. His ex had full custody at the time of their divorce.

He is their biological father. Has he tried pressing charges against the grandparents for interference of custody? Not sure why Maryland would not put automatic full custody on the surviving parent, but has he tried filing to change custody? Is he at least getting all of his visitation?

And this most certainly isn't legal advice here, I would check with a local attorney before attempting it, but I would just pick my children up from school and go home...

I would like to know if grandparent could get into trouble for this issue? My husband had not seen his children in 6 years due to mothers violent nature towards him and heroine addiction. Even though Soc Services were contacted no one did a thing. My husbands ex died of heroine OD in Dec 2005we just found out thru the deposition that GP's never wanted to contact my husband and had no intention of it. Social Security Dept told them they had to do it in order to collect benefits. Does anyone know if what they did was illegal not to mention morally wrong. My husbands entire family is listed in the phone book and my husbands brother has a well know established business that the Grandparents knew about. please advise

I will try and make this short My husband has 2 sons 10 and 8 he and his wife divorced 6 years ago and had an extremely violatile relationship. He has not seen his sons in 6 years. His wife died 11 months ago and he recently found out. Grandparents did not make an attempt to contact my husband My husband and the grandparents are now battling custody. Going through mediation. Grandparents stated children were afraid but finally after mediation my husband got to spend the weekend with them. It was a great and wonderful weekend and the children acted as though they had known their father all of their lives as though not a moment missed. My husband was truly happy however we can tell that the grandparents are making sure that the kids dont get to close with their father because they dont want to lose them. Does my husband have the right as their father to remove them from the grandparents home. Please keep in mind the grandparents have not been given custody nor do they have emergency or temporary custody. The court has not established this. does he have any kind of rights he has always paid child support. As I mentioned - very hateful relationship with wife- not by him but her. She refused to let him see the boys and moved 8 times to prevent him from finding her.




if their grandparents truly cared about the happiness of their grandchildren they would let them stay wherever they would like. I think they should be allowed to be with their father. I think if the father really wanted to see the children he should have taken the mother to court six years before her death. i dont know all the circumstances of the situation but i think the happiness of the children should be put before anything.

My husband could not afford to take her back to court he was already paying a hefty amount in Child support. He would of if he could have and as far as children are concerned where ever makes them happy isnt always right. the gp's are going on 70 they can not provide the long term care that is needed to raise children properly. The live in a pretty crime ridden area and they are not going to be able to control the boys once they start thinking more independently and realizing that they are able to get away with things without the gp's knowledge. My husband and I are 35 we can easily identify issues much quicker than their gp's who arent not in sync with the times. GP's from my experience are much more lenient when it comes to discipline I have seen it. If the kids dont have the proper up bringing and discipline we will have problems later with them.

Well, it has been 6 months (give or take) since you first posted. Did your husband ever go get the kids or initiate any contact with them?

yes we have we first saw them at mediation(the attorney's and the mediator basically forced the grandparents). It was FABULOUS!! we see them every weekend and they spend weekends with us as well. our trial is thursday needless to say we are sick with worry over the outcome the GP's will not let my husband have custody so we have been battling since may of 2006. It is almost surreal how we get along as a family as though no time has ever been taken away. My daugters really enjoy the time with their brothers and my husband is loving life again. :)

Good!:)

Take a deep breath and think "happy thoughts". Be sure to let us know how it goes in court. I'll keep your family in my prayers.

My husband did not win the case the GP's got full physical custody. We are worried about the child support payments? can the judge make him pay more than necessary. The judge was completely un sympathetic and treated my husband very poorly in the court room. we feel our attorney did not represent up properly either. He didnt ask all the questions necessary did not answer any thing without severe fumbling. It was a nightmare to say the least. We have two girls and my husband has another daughter along with the boys we dont know how they will do the child support. any thoughts?

my personal advice will be shot down, but if you go to this site the people who are there will be able to help you..........you are not alone!!!


www.parentsrights.org

if you have time i would talk to another atty and appeal.........if you dont you will be stuck with this order and it will be very hard to change........

you said your husband had visitation before mom's death but was unable to use it? what exactly did the papers say about what type of CUSTODY he had???

from the way this all sounds...and the way it played out in court....there's something that is not being shared here...there would have been absolutely no ground for the judge to not give dad at least joint custody- so that begs the question- in what ways is the court finding dad lacking or unfit?

im not saying they didn't, but the trial courts dont have to find him unfit.........the judge just has the power to rule in his discretion and what he deems the "best interest of the child".....they commonly treat these situations like a parent to parent custody case.......however it is not, grandparents do not have a right to custody of a child that is not theirs......if he was not unfit he should appeal!!! he has a constitutional right to his child...it is very likely that this courts ruling will be overturned in favor of the biological parent........the higher courts pay closer attention to the law!!!

Hello,

I am the father on my wife's log in...wouldn't allow me to register myself email conflict. I will try to make this brief so not to drag on too long......but we are talking al long time here.

I divorced my first wife about 9-10 years ago. During my divorce I was having trouble seeing my two boys....throughout litigation I was finally able to visit. The divorce and custody order basically gave her full physical and legal custody. I pleaded for mediated visitation because of her violent nature and was granted that. The place of mediation closed prior to our first visit. I was awarded visitation every other weekend, Alternating holidays, father's day and two weeks out of the year.

Here is where it gets tricky.....after the first place closed I lost contact with my ex-wife. Example: moving to non published locations....non published phone numbers and during the brief conversations with her I was flat out denied visitation. Claims of Phone harrasment, trespassing and so on and so forth were thrown in my face. I could not afford legal assistance because of the amount of Child Support I was paying. I was not eligable for free legal assistance because my gross income was too high. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

This went on for many years with no contact...in fact my ex told me at one point that my kids have never seen a picture of their father (which was a lie I found out later). In attempts to gain some form of assistance:

I contacted Child Support: Response- this is a civil matter goto court.

I contacted various schools: Response-we are not allowed to give any information out to you(me).

I called child protective services for fear of my childrens safety and well being.: Response-we will initiate an investigation....How will I know if anything has been done? We will contact you if we find anything wrong......I never heard back from them.

When she would call me I would ask to see my kids and she would become verbally insultive and threatening. Yes I feared for my life at times....several occasion occured: She knocked on my door in the early morning hours trying to coax me outside with cries of my oldest son is very ill.......early morning being arounhd 2-3:00am. I confronted her through the door stating she lived right across from a hospital and why travel 5-10 minutes to me if he is so sick...why not call from the hospital...then I called a neighbor who claimed to see 3 guys behind my apt. with baseball bats.

She bumped into my vehicle with hers and started threatening my life.

She continually attacked my charactor with false alegations.

Most of the violent incendants went on in the early parts of our seperation/divorce time.......during which a court case was filed against her and I was advised to take notes of all the incidents.

During that trial she was found not guilty.....as I refered to my notes her attorney pointed out to the judge that the state's attorney never entered my notes as evidence(removed my notes and I never got them back) I did not want to purger myself in court on dates and times I could not remember and as a result she walked.

Also in my divorce I was allowed to use my parents address and phone as contact information for me....because of a direct result of her violent nature.....I was awarded that.

I went to the police with my court order of visitation...they told me to goto the commisioner and so I did.

Commissioner told me I have the documentation....get the poilice goto the home and go see your kids......went to the police.....they did nothing and wouldn't give me her location and stated I needed to go back to the commissioner and so I did.

Commissioner then stated I need to goto court no specific terms just reopen the case.

Years go by and I can get NO help from anyone. My wife and I research on the net......she goes to neighborhoods we think she may be at......leave permanent marker notes on a playground with all my contact information for my boys to call. Brief conversations periodically with my ex asking to see my kids and FINALLY one night she says yes. I get her information and state I am bringing my Sister in law (ex-Sheriff) at that point I am called a piece of **** and told if I show up the police will soon follow.....no visit.

My father passes away and my ex contacts my mother who states my children NEED to see their father and that she too needs to see her grandchildren.......we wait....no call...number changed again to non published number.

Another year passes and my family decides to move to out of state to get closer to my brother and his family. While I am down there signing a lease on a new home I am being served in Maryland. I come home and my wife and I research the net to try and find out about the summons...we find out my ex-wife has an EXTENSIVE criminal record mainly drug related.....OH remember when I turned her into child protective services and heard nothing back......yea I do....well we find a case in MD court for second degree assault on my ex-wife AND my OLDEST SON. Thanks Child protective services you did nothing to protect my childrens safety. We also find a petition for guardianship filed by the grandparents.

I call the only contact number I know of and speak to a relative of my ex's and ask where my ex is....he doesn't know he tells me.....how can I contact her? He again does not know. (Lies you are about to find out)

The next day I goto the curcuit court to answer the petition and find out why. This is around May/June. Thinking they are filing because my ex is either in jail or heading to jail and personally not knowing the real reason for the petition I seek out the clerk of the court. The Clerk lets me know there is a petition for gaurdianship and says lets see why......after reveiwing the documents she says "Oh, karen is no longer here" I give off a chuckle and say oh, so she is in jail already...where are my children. The clerk then informs me that my ex wife is dead.....my first response was when? and then i ask about my children are they ok, who has them...wait a minute lets back up to when.....she died Dec 10, 2005 and I am standing in front of the clerk in may 2006 so she has been dead almost 6 months....6 months and no one has contacted me or the authorities that there father is still alive and in the state of MARYLAND. In fact not only was no one contacted but I was even lied to by family members about her death. The clerk gives me the contact information from the petition and I contact the GP's enroute out of the city. I first express my simpathy for their loss...then I ask about my boys.....I am denied visits and to obtain my children and bring them home. I ask th GP's why the relative lied to me about my ex's death and she answers because you know the situation.......I call the city police and with my ID, my divorce papers and my ex's death certificate and a copy of the maryland law. I meet them at the GP's residence....the police tell me they don't know why I even called them to come there and they would do nothing.....civil matter have your day in court....

The Maryland law states and I don't have the exact law in front or I would reference it to you all.....upon the death of paternal parent Immediate guardianship goes to the surviving parent. That never happened. I contacted an attorney and filed for immediate custody- that was denied. Also in the filing was Kidknapping- that was denied too. Matter of fact no temperary order was ever implimented. Finally visitation was allowed after my attorney had to work for it and I got to see my children, who played the first visit better than an emmy winner.

When they arrived they were quiet...youngest son was crying and the GP(grandmother was too) no sooner did the vehicle clear the parking lot my boys were smiles and running around like nothing ever happened the visit was very healthy and promising.

Following my attorney's advise I did not refuse to bring my children back to their grandparents during overnight visits.

I was refused certain weekends and almost the entire month of December. I missed one weekend on my own.

I contacted Child Support who informed me the case needed to be closed since the checks were being written to my ex and were sitting in a bank account and going no where......so I closed the case.

During the trial. I was asked about the violent incidents and such.....I did not have my notes from back then and I am bad with dates and times but I answered as best I could. My attempts to see my children were brought out and according to the judge fell on deaf ears.......the judge stated that Baltimore city is a Pro-Sec court system and I could have used the courts to assist my visitation.......I was told I needed an attorney and I could not get a free attorney cause I made too much money(gross income). The GP's stated they raised my children on and off through-out their lives and at some point seperating my children....but they were never made to bring proof of those statements. They did testify they had no intentions of telling me their daughter died. The courts did not find me unfit. I am not a criminal....I do not do drugs nor do I drink alchohol. So they moved onto best interest of the child. Even though my attorney objected the judge saw my boys in his chambers ( I believe recorded). Best interest of the child...reminding everyone reading this that most if not all of the research done in my case was by myself or my wife...NOT my attorney.

We brought censius documents with us to court.....both our zip code and theirs...relatively the same size in square milage.....ours 8 violent sexual offenders theirs 78 two of which live in their neighborhood less than a block away. Schools.....ours blue ribbon schools, theirs public write ups in the local news about rat infestation and of course the all knowing baltimore city school drop out rate among other issues. homes mine 3 bedroom single family home on alittle over 1/2 acre...theirs 3 bedroom rowhome of which my boys have to share a bed room because the GP's do not share one room together. These are things that weren't brought up in court...in fact what was brought up in court was.

I have a 3 bedroom single family home on 1/2 acre...they have a 3 bedroom rowhome. I live in the suburbs and they in the city...judge askes my attorney and what are you saying about the city since most everyone in this court resides int he city...my attorney repsonds I wanted to make the court aware my client lives in the suburbs. According to my attorney the judge did not want to hear all the evidence we had brought to bare in this case in fact we were told we would only have 3 hours to plead our case...yes the trial went over 3 hours, but we were not allowed to submit important documentation into the court. Age was brought into the facts along with the fact the Grandmother has hepatitis B and other ailments including depression. The GP's also claimed I hardly if ever paid child support...yet the checks always went to their address which also proved that my ex failed to follow the guidelines and laws of child support by not updating her information with the office of childsupport...this was taken in light stating she needed a steady place for the check to come or else her moving around so much would have caused her to not see her checks or a laps in the time she did receive them..The judge asked me about car-seats during my sepreation I responded I only had one cause my second son was not born...then he redirected the question to after my second son was born and I stated I may have but I think I only had one because I was not even allowed to see my children(we are talking about a decade ago). It was also brought up in court that the GP's had evicted my ex-wife and my boys from a home in which they owned...stating they had to sell it because they could not afford the taxes on it......the sale of the home was off the top of my head about a year after they evicted them all, of course that played no factors in the judges decision making either.

Upon the findings the judge stated he was aware of my constitutional rights as a father. He then stated he did not find me unfit as a father and moved on to best interest of the children. Stating that my time away from them was an issue and that the grandparents have played an important role in their lives(Which again was never proven...just stated by the GP's and without their daughter alive...there was no way for me to dispute it.....so they can lie in court and not have to show proof). The judge stated it was in the best interest of my boys to remain in the custody of the GP's. Giving the GP's Sole Physical custody and giving joint legal custody.

At the time I was seeing my boys every other weekend for overnight visits..the visits were fine...they were quiet leaving the GP's home but once in the car opened up and once arriving at my home were very open.

The judge finally ordered I am allowed 1 weekend a month for visits and 1 week out of the year........How is a father suppose to care for his children and get closer to them if I am only allowed to see them one weekend a month...he took visitation away and gave me 1 weekend......also stating it was a minimum visit and more were allowed...of which I will not see thanks to the GP's. before the order hit the computers I was denied my 1st weekend visit from the GP's....they conveniently enrolled them in camp.....now without an order I can not file contempt (something I learned while going through this trial ordeal) and I can not write the judge because I do not know how to and the Child Support hearing was so soon......so last week I went to the child support hearing and had every intention of bringing this to light in the court......judge made it very clear he was ONLY hearing child support issues...even though this is the same judge who heard the custody trial and awarded the GP's so that was never brought up....I received a copy of the order and mandates(reasons for stripping my legal and constitutional rights and favoring for the GP's). I did fill out a motion of appeal while I was there but now have to wait for my next paycheck to pay for the filing fees and obtain copies of the court documents and such....and that is where I stand.

I released my attorney after the child support hearing because I could not afford him and I think he failed me in every way possible. The only thing my attorney did for me was to get the paperwork heading in the right direction.

Almost all the research done was by my wife and I. I was billed for interogatories which he never received responses from their attorney and never sought to either. He did not bring hardly anything we researched into court stating the judge wanted to hear facts alone and stating the judge would not allow them to be heard as well.

So, I guess in closing this reply I have to ask myself.......where is Due-process.....where are my rights....and why am I not allowed to raise my two boys. It truly amazes me how fathers are pushed aside day in and day out....some people like to point fingers at father's and laugh while not knowing the facts and others claim father's don't even care.....but when a father does truly care and stands up for his children and their well being he is pushed around, knocked down, lied to and ultimately denied everything that even makes him a father, let alone a man. But yet I continue fighting for my boys in hopes to one day bring them home for good. So, help me if you can cause I sincerely need it.

is it a permanant order? an appeal is a good idea.......im not sure of the exact laws in your state.......usually your constitutional rights should have been upheld first, then if you were found to be unfit or acting inconsistant with your parental rights the best interest standard would apply....hire a new attorney.......find one thats experienced in the matter.......reasearch caselaw

Thank you for coming here and clearing up any areas in question, I know that had to take a while to type out, and it's not pleasant reliving all that either.....some things you may want to check out

http://www.childrensjustice.org/cases1.htm
http://www.gocrc.com/constitution.html
http://www.crckids.org/law-legislation.htm

also check out father rights groups, see what resources there are or information you can take advantage of to be better prepared in the next go round