ok here is whats going on ...i am a single mom of four teenaged boys ,well one just turned 18 and is graduating.whom i am very proud of i might add .
well i have been divorced 10 1/2 yrs i have custody well now he is trying to get them from me .
i will tell you what happened when i told my ex i wanted a divorce i also told him i am keeping the boys and i am going to go for support well i was young and dumb he turned around and told me he would give up his rights and never see his kids well i didnt want that kids need there father in there lives well he took them every other weekend no problems for 9 yrs we remained friends of course for the kids sake.well he got married a second time to a nice women got along with her she is great .well he left her after they had a son together and she was 5 months pregnant for another women well since this new gf come into our lives its been hell .she is trying to control everyone and telling myself and his soon to be 2 ex wife how to raise our children ,,she controls my ex and tells him what to say to both of us ...well anyway back to why i am scared ok april 25 th 2006 my ex came to the house to pick up our 16 yr old son he wanted to stay over his house the other boys stayed with me ..well our other son whom is gonna be 13 was coming down the street well my ex started on him ,see he sprained his ankle a couple of weeks before this his p.t. told him to start using it so he was well his father was like well it looks like your better your out jumping around and acting like a retard your acting as if you never hurt urself well my son got upset walked away from his dad came over to me to tell me about what his dad said all i know is next thing he has him over aganst a garage i couldnt see what was going on i assumed he was yelling at him from walking away till he went to leave my son was holding his throat that is when my other sons had told me he had him by the throat i said why didnt you say something i took my son into the house he was holding his throat and crying he couldnt breathe well my bf took him to the sink trying to splash cold water on his face to calm him down when my son coughed there was some blood in his spit he wanted me to have his dad arrested i couldnt do it cause i knew one day he would want to see his dad again so i told my son come on we are going to the doctors they took xrays he sprained our sons neck and gave him a contusion,well after that happened the two little ones didnt want togo over there so i wasnt gonna force them i told them when you are ready pick up the phone and call him i would never stop you from seein your father i did tell the gf what had happened and she said fathers do that to there children i said not to mine she said well he does it to my son to keep him in line i said well you can then ,but he is to never touch my sons again well he stopped my support of 50 aweek to nothin so i took him to domestics for support now he wants to sue me for custody.i am a full time mom ,i take them to all there appointments (dentist&doctors).i take care of them when there sick.i was with my son all the times he had surgery .i was here for my boys since birth ,here for them 24/7 they are my life.nothing comes before them . he wasnt always in there lives he has been in alot of different relationships were those women we more important then his boys ,well not me i have been with the same man for 10 yrs i lived on my own 9 of those yrs and raised my sons.still raising them doing the best i can .i go to school meetings i do everything i can to get the kids the help they need in school.i cant lose them they are my life. my world.everyone tells me not to worry about it i am a great mom and everyone knows it.my sister said tina it will come out that you have been there for your boys always. that you take great care of them ...see when i would call my ex and tell him all the help i get for my boys he tells me there is nothing wrong with them they need a foot up there arse .he would be like give them two me for a couple of weeks i ll straighten them out im like no thats ok .see he was abusive when i was married to him i know what that meant and i am still afraid of him till this day.


also he is living with his gf whom has a 2 bedroom home with two kids a boy and a girl boy is 10 and girl is 5 the boy has a room and the girl sleeps in with my ex and his gf and then when my sons and his 2nd wifes kids go over on the same weekend my kids are on the living room floor and his other kids from marriage two are in the bedroom with ex and his gf they are 1 and 3 .


i have been taking care of my sons for 10 1/2 yrs they always had beds ,clothes and roof over there heads clothes on ther back and food in there mouths i am a good mom my kids are my life i am here for them 24/7 i never done anything wrong to my kids ....there needs come before any man or anything .....i went to all school meetings and i call all the time to recieve help for my sons .....i think its messed up that when a women sues for support that is the only time someone wants to take the kids from the other parent .

Do you have a legal question somewhere in there? If so, please post what your question(s) are without all of the other irrelevant things.
We can't really help without knowing what you are asking. :)

That was very hard to read without any punctuation or caps.
My Advice:
Get a lawyer
Bring the lawyer a copy of the medical report from the neck injury to your son.
Call CPS right now and tell them what is going on --(cps is child protective services.... They will investigate...Tell them that this man Needs HELP. I'm sorry that his girlfriend is such a stupid *7%$# but NO CHILD should be choked to keep them in line.. and if his girlfriend is not smart enough to leave him and lets him do this to her child then someone needs to step in and help that 10 year old little boy!!!!)
I doubt he has a chance in hell of getting your boys considering that he could not even house them!

does he really have a chance to take my sons after i have been raising them on my own for ten years with his big 50 aweek in support
for four boys wasnt nothing he thinks its all the money they needed to raise them he has no clue how much money it really takes ..

when i use to ask him for help wit school clothes he handed me a 20 dollar bill i was like what is this gonna do he said you can buy pants with it i was like its 14 dollars a pair he is like so buy one at a time.

it was unbelievable these were his kids two and he never had time for them when they were small and even now
i did and do
everything doctor appts dentist appts hospital visits when my sons would get hurt i would call him he would be like just call me later and let me know how he is you know
what after awhile i just stopped calling him .

when my 13 yr old had his migranes up crying a puking i was the one up with him when he was a baby got colds and sick i was the one who took care of him .

i took care of all four of my sons for yrs without him .


back in dec my 14 yr old needed knee surgery i was there oh and i was there for him when he had his tonsils out ...back to the knee surgery his dad couldnt be there cause of work but the next week after my sons surgery he went with his gf to take her son to get his foot checked but couldnt take the day off for his sons major knee surgery,,,nothing would keep me away from my sons no job nothing they are more important to me...you can always get another job.,.

he is always taken off work but he couldnt that day yes it makes me angry cause it hurt my son and it still bothers him .


i have been with my boys since 96 of nov did
it on my own

yes so i sued
him finally after doing it on my own,cause he stopped paying his big 50 aweek and now there older they need more i cant do it on my own so i sued him then he sued me cause he doesnt want to pay for his kids.


its not fair for us moms that take good care of the kids never hurt them
was and is always there for them thru all theses yrs and now to pay court cost and all other things to keep your children cause the father doesnt want to pay .

i can tell you so many other things that had happen but i would be here a long time.

Okay, you did what a parent does. Your ex didn't. You had (and still have) a legal responsibility to report your ex for abusing your son. If a person is or has abused your child, your response is not to say, "but they may want to have a relationship with their father." Your job is to report the abuse to the authorities and then work as much as you can with the DA to get the stiffest sentence possible for the jerk. Your kids' safety comes WAY before any desire they might have in the future to know him. When your kids are 18 and able to make their own decisions about him, then they can decide. Until then, you decide for them that NOBODY has the right to abuse your child in any way, shape, or form. IF you DON'T report this and you let him get away with hurting them, you are abetting the abuse. Get it? You are not wrong to file for child support. Your sister is correct. Unless the court finds you to be unfit, you will not lose your children.

i think the main reason i didnt report it is cause i am still afraid of my ex .i know i should have and wish till this day i have i didnt call the police but i did call women in crisis i also took him to the doctor told his family doc whom he always sees what had occurred and told the school counsler so they can help me ...but i did tell ppl what happened hoping they would do something and i would get help if he acted out he has a bad temper i know i felt his abuse while we were married ....how long do you have to report a abuse after it happened ..can i still talk to someone about it now even though we are going thru a custody issue ...

see he threatened the boys that if they go to see his parents they will be punished and that they have no reason to be at there grandparents house ..they love there grandparents they never harmed the boys .
he is just pissed at his parents cause they do not want the gf in there home.he is welcomed but she isnt so now the ex and her doesnt want the boys to see them cause they do not want her in there home..

he is welcomed but not her and he picked her over them that is his doings but to hurt your child by keeping them away from them is bs.

so the grandmother was here to see them on sunday and i told her they kids are not going to stop seein them i will take them to see her if she wants me to and she said plz dont keep them away ,,,,i know they didnt do anything to my kids they never once ever hurt them they gave them love and respect and have been there for these kids all there lives he isnt going to make theses children suffer and not let them have a relationship with there grandparents ...i will be telling the eval and the courts that he threatened them with this and told them they have no reason being at there grandparents hello this is there family if he doesnt want anything to do with them cause they dont like his new gf they so be it,,and i think he needs to grow up he sounds like he is in grade school....

like i said before if my parents didnt like someone i was wit i would still go see my parents ,just leave him at home ...this is your parents ....and i wonder if and when he leaves her like he does to everyother women ..will he be back at his parents kissing there butt yes he will be ...he is blinded by money she has and she has him under her control and when he sees everything in a different lite it will be to late.


he left two families with kids....moved in with a women whom has two kids of her own he is still married to his second wife ,,,just got caught having sex at work with a co-worker you really think this relationship is going to last plz


there is so much more you wouldnt believe it.


my relationship i had since he left me ....i lived on my own with my boys for 9 yrs just moved in last aug 2005 with my fiance my main focus was always my sons .

i have been with him and only him all this time ..

he has been thru more women then you can believe
i dont care but i think that had and has a affect on my sons do you think ?

First of all in the state of PA it is AGAINST THE LAW TO NOT REPORT CHILD ABUSE. You can get into trouble for not reporting it.....ALL OF YOUR KIDS CAN BE PUT INTO FOSTER CARE IF THIS COMES OUT IN A CUSTODY HEARING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am shocked that your family Doctor did nothing about this b/c it is also against the law. I know this because I work in the medical field and took an oath to report any crimes against a child or elderly person that I am aware of. First get that straight. Second your ex-husband will only get supervised visitations if anything after you do this and he will still have to pay support.
And yes it is not good for kids to be around multiple relationships as your ex has had. But you have been the main influence so hopefully they have learned from you example.

i did report it to the family doctor ,women in crisis and school counslers its not that it happened and i said nothing i was looking for someone to help me so how can my children be taken from me.....i was terrified of my ex and part of me still is but i know i have to stand up to him for my kids ...i am a good mom .i will never make that mistake again .

i love my boys there are my life and i will fight for them always .

thanks for the response.

yes he has been in alot of relationships and got caught havin sex at work with a co worker behind boxes my kids know about this.i dont want them to think that this is ok to do .

i have been with my fiance for 10 1/2 yrs i have lived on my own for 9 1/2 of those yrs

my fiance and i bought a nice big home for the boys so we can all be together i waited for years to do this cause i didnt want to ruin things and cause i wanted it to be fair to my sons and when they were ready for that move ..

i had and still have a solid relationship.i want the kids to learn from that.


thanks for your post

:( ok i have a question i can check the courthouse to see if anything new happens with my case i looked tonite and it said rule returned and it has a court date for oct 6th does anyone know what this means?

we paid back in aug for a home eval and nothing came out of it.
getting scared and worried here someone help me

:( ok i have a question i can check the courthouse to see if anything new happens with my case i looked tonite and it said rule returned and it has a court date for oct 6th does anyone know what this means?

we paid back in aug for a home eval and nothing came out of it.
getting scared and worried here someone help me
I assume it means that the decision has been made and you have a court date so that the judge can inform you of his ruling. Nobody has any way to know what the judge has decided, if that is what you are asking.

i paid for a home eval back in aug and i never heard from them nor did they come to due the home eval,,so how can a judge rule?

dont they have to due the home eval first since it was ordered by the courts?

what if i paid and my ex didnt?

Most evaluators require that the money is paid before the evaluations will begin. Does your order say an evaluation or does it say a home evulation? If it only says an evaluation, the evaluator does not have to visit your home.

How many times did you and/or your children visit with the evaluator?

Another possibility (slim as it may be) is that the evaluator informed the court that your ex was not cooperating with the evaluatoin process, so the judge made a ruling. Obviously, if that were the case, it would NOT be a ruling favoring your ex. Please remember that we are just listing possibilities and have no idea what the judge is doing.

ok thanks for trying .......

i just got a letter from my lawyer my ex is being held in contempt of court we have togo to court on oct 6th ...does anyone know now what will happen?

this is for him not paying the half of his evaluation.

three visits to the evaluator and one at the home....we both had to pay 1050 to the evaluator i paid mine on aug 17th ,,,he never paid so ....i was wondering why so much time was going by and nothing was happening .

i got a letter yesterday in the mail that he is being held in contempt of court for not paying his half..

so now we have a court hearing for contempt of court .

which my lawyer told me it doesnt look good for him cause he was the one that started this.

after i sued him for support after only getting 50 a week for four boys for 10 yrs there all teenagers now .. there ages are 16 14 13
my oldest graduated this year and is 18 .


that 50 aweek didnt do crap

Were the two of you given a deadline to pay for the evaluation?

Did your laywer file the contempt of court charges?

yes we were giving a deadline the order was made july 28th we had 20 days to pay well i paid mine aug 17th ...

i called my lawyer on friday asking her why i havent heard anything...she said do you know if your ex paid i said no i only talk to him about the kids .


well she told me it was way over due for the evaluation i said what if he doenst pay she said he will be held in contempt.......well i got a letter the next day from my attorney stating he is being held in contempt and that there is a hearing for oct 6th .

all my lawyer told me is that it will not look good for him cause he filed this .


i believe the eval sent a letter to the court house to let them know my ex did not pay the court order that he is in contempt

Yes, since you paid and the ex did not, he is being held in contempt, there is nothing you can do but wait until the Oct.6th. hearing. I would imagine that the judge is going to force him to pay for the eval, other than that, we once again, can not tell you what a judge is going to decide. I can tell you, again, as others have allready, that this is NOT looking good for your husband, and at this rate, you have nothing to worry about. Has your lawyer asked for a restraining order against your ex? This could make your case stronger for you keeping custody, and he only recieving supervised visits. I would also demand that the g/f not be the supervisor either, since she has made it clear that abuse is tolerated by her also! Did you make a police report? I know you told people, but did you go to the police and file a report for assault for your son?

Brother and sister can not share a room after a certain age, there are cases at the court house library stating same. You would need definate proof and would need to talk to your attorney about filing something with cys (child youth serv) in your county....I had a friend who had to do it in berks cnty....the child was not allowed to stay overnight anymore until the father got suitable bedroom space for the children...

Are you going to answer my questions? Good luck tomorrow!

My ex's attorney had asked for a payment plan of 6 months cause he is unable to come up with the money for the home eval the judge told him do you realize your asking for 6 months to pay then it will take like another 6 months to have a home eval and everything done and then you go back into a modified hearing again and if you still dont agree then it goes to trial.


this is bs so we are looking at what about a year and a half


by this time my sons will be

matt is 16 now lets see by the time this is all over he might be 18
justin is 14 now then about 16
brandon 13 now then be about 15

Remember When I Told U All That He Asked For 6 Months To Come Up With The Money Well I Was Just On The Court House Site To Check My Case It Was Denied ...so Can Someone Tell Me What Will Happen Now?

Will He Have To Come Up With The Money Sooner Or Will We Go Right To Court Or Will All This Stupid Crap End ?

God I Need Some Good News For Once .....

Did the site mention why your case was denied? Be strong and patient, Family law / domestic issues can be a mess in the court system.

Did the site mention why your case was denied? Be strong and patient, Family law / domestic issues can be a mess in the court system.

The case wasn't denied. Her ex's request for a payment plan was.

we were in court oct 18th he asked for 6 months to come up with the money she asked what his reasons were he said child support he is paying myself and his 2nd wife child support for 5 kids she granted it in the court room she told my ex he better be able to prove it .

this is what the court site has doesnt give you details
Filings
Date Filing Filed By Cost To
10/24/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
10/24/2006 ORDER-DENIED
10/20/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
10/18/2006 PETITION FOR SPECIAL RELIEF
10/18/2006 CERTIFICATE OF SERVICE
10/09/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
10/09/2006 ORDER/HEARING SCHEDULE FOR
Special Process on 10/18/2006 01:30PM At COURTROOM #2
09/28/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
09/28/2006 RULE RETURNED
Special Process on 10/06/2006 03:00PM At COURTROOM NO 2
07/31/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
07/31/2006 ORDER-HOME EVALUATION
07/27/2006 REPORT CCO
06/16/2006 FEE RECEIVED 65.00
06/14/2006 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
06/14/2006 NOTICE OF CUSTODY CONFERENCE
Special Process on 07/13/2006 09:45AM At CCO
06/12/2006 PETITION TO MODIFY CUSTODY ORDER PLAINTIFF
06/12/2006 CUSTODY CONCILIATION OFFICER FEE
100.00 PLAINTIFF
06/12/2006 CERTIFICATE OF SERVICE
03/04/1997 STIPULATION & ORDER OF COURT-COPIES MAILED
01/13/1997 ORDER OF COURT/COPIES MAILED
01/13/1997 ORDER/HEARING SCHEDULE FOR
Special Process on 03/14/1997 At
01/13/1997 NOTICE OF CUSTODY CONFERENCE
Special Process on 03/14/1997 01:30PM At CCO
01/07/1997 PRAECIPE/PROCEED IN FORMA PAUPERIS
01/07/1997 AFFIDAVIT OF FINANCIAL STATUS


1997 is when i got primary custody had the boys all this time i sued for child support in may 2006 then he sued me for custody

ok if his payment plan was denied what will happen now ..will they make him pay right away or what?:confused:

You should edit your post and remove the names. It's never a good idea to post real names, you can put a first name and leave the last name blank.

ex has till april 19th to pay home eval and he just lost his job on march 19th......i have to go to court APRIL 24 TH TO MODIFY CS.

The wheels move slow, but most of the time they do work. Keep the kids safe, and they will always love you for it. It looks like you have done the right thing.

Good luck hon! Thank you for the update!