Hello all. I could use some help. I am 14 and a freashmen in highschool. And my boyfriend is 17 and a senior in highschool. We dont have sex, and dont plan on it until we marry, if we were to stay together. But he turns 18 in November. Does that mean we have to break up when he's 18? Please someone help. :confused:

No, it means that you cannot have any sexual contact. As long as your parents are all right with you two dating, then that is fine. If they say no, that is the final answer. There are no laws against dating, only sexual contact. BTW, sexual contact is not limited to sexual intercourse.

Let me put it this way... you can have exactly the same level of sexual contact as you would with your elderly uncle Harold in the first pew in church during Sunday morning service.

In other words, nothing. No kissing past a peck on the cheek, no touching (even through clothes), not even any racy poetry or emails... nothing that leads to a higher level of sexual arrousal of either of you....even dancing could be out...

Basically, high school is gonna stink because you are a child dating a grown up. Want to rethink this?

Would he get in trouble for us dating now, or would that happen after he turned 18?

Dating, with parental consent, is not illegal for anyone.

However, if that dating leads to any of the things mentioned above, other issues can come into play.

and, just because I have a feeling you are thinking about doing something rash... even now, contact just isn't a good idea because of your age...

From the California Penal Code...

(c) Any person who engages in an act of unlawful sexual
intercourse with a minor who is more than three years younger than
the perpetrator is guilty of either a misdemeanor or a felony, and
shall be punished by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one
year, or by imprisonment in the state prison.

Once he turns 18, it gets sticky for him to have any relations with anyone under 18, but it gets REALLY bad if you are more than 2 or more than 3 years younger than he is. (Broken out because different laws apply).

These are calendar years... not age... so if he is 3 years and one day older than you, he gets to be a sexual offender at 18 if you guys do ANYTHING.

To add an additional layer to this... your parents also come into play. Let's say that you are bound and determined to have this relationship and your parents say no. Well, the law says it is okay, so they can't do anything, right?

WRONG!

You are a minor. Therefore, your parents can swear out a restraining or protective order against him. These orders basically say that you two must stay away from each other or HE goes to prison.

Oh, and plans of marriage, pregnancy or any other condition or circumstance resulting from your relationship doesn't effect the above... in fact, there are cases where a minor was impregnated by an adult and the doctors turned him in.... because they have to by law.