I am new to this and would really appreciate your advice. I am 26 and mother to an 8 year old and 4 year old. Their father and I divorced 3 years ago after 5 years of marriage. We agreed on joint custody, with me having physical custody & visitation is 'reasonable'. Everything was fine until he got remarried last summer. To make a long story short, somehow my ex and the new wife are alienating me when it comes to my oldest. She refuses to come home after his weekend. Then when I do finally get her home, she is completely fine and doesn't lash out. I have even had to call the police. They cannot help me at all. Then my ex went to the police and accused me of abusing the kids. DHS got involved and determined there was absolutely no abuse. Even tonight I went to pick them up, my 4 year old was so excited to see me, while my 8 year old wanted to stay. I told her no, it was my night and we were going home. She threw a fit and ran inside. Her dad says he won't make her go and refuses to try and communicate with me at all. I have my oldest in counseling but my ex refuses to come as well. He tells her (and me) that I am the one that needs counseling. I have to go to the courthouse and file a contempt of court against him in the morning. He says he is going to fight for full custody. Does he have a leg to stand on? I am a good mom, I have always been the one to provide them with everything and have always taken them to their appointments, school functions, etc. He pays child support but when he is laid of in the winter he stops completely. He has recently moved. So if he was awarded custody, she would have to change schools. I am so frustrated and concerned about all of this. I am trying to stay positive but I can feel myself breaking.... Can anyone help???

Well I think you do have hope, especially since he cares so much that he will not participate in the oldest child's counseling but will encourage her to be insubordinate to you. I think you need to play these points up along with witnesses and others who can attest taht you are an excellent parent. I suggest consulting an attorney because this could get ugly. I hate to say this is about money- but with him recently marrying, I think it is about them not paying money and making you pay.

Thanks for the words of advice. I went to the courthouse to file the contempt of court and they looked at me as if I was on drugs. I guess this is not the sort of thing a woman usually does on her own. I did contact my lawyer and I have an appointment with him Wednesday. I had to let my youngest go back with him (per our agreement), because if I refuse visitation, I look bad. I also called the DHS worker that came out before to see if there was anything she could do. Other than note that I called and put it into her report, she says my lawyer has to handle everything. Does this mean that he could take the kids across country and I can't do anything about it? Nobody seems to give a crap that he is refusing to give my kids back!!!