BaD aSs Me
12-04-2004, 10:12 AM
My mom sent this to me and I thought it was really cute and wanted to share
with the moms here.
----- Original Message -----
From:
To:
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 6:48 PM
Subject: Every Mom will relate to this one!
Subject: MOMS The following are different answers given by school-age children
tothe given questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Think about it, it was the best way to get more people. 3. Mostly to clean the house. 4. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3. He made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just usedbigger parts. Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom? 1. We're related. 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's momslike me. What ingredients are mothers made of? 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and
everythingnice in the world, and one dab of mean. 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then theymostly use string. I think. What kind of little girl was your Mom? 1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff. 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would bepretty bossy. 3. They say she used to be nice. How did your Mom meet your dad? 1. Mom was working in a store and dad was shoplifting. What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him? 1. His last name. 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does heget drunk on beer? Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO todrugs and YES to chores? Why did your Mom marry your dad? 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Momeats a lot. 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. What makes a real woman? 1. It means you have to be really bossy without looking bossy. Who's the boss at your house? 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dads
sucha goofball. 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuffunder the bed. 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do
thandad. What's the difference between moms and dads? 1. Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got to
workat work. 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. 3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real
powercause that's who you gotta ask if you want to sleep over at yourfriend's. What does your Mom do in her spare time? 1. Mothers don't do spare time. 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. What's the difference between moms and grandmas? 1. About 30 years. 2. You can always count on grandmothers for candy. Sometimesmoms don't even have bread on them! Describe the world's greatest Mom? 1. She would make broccoli taste like ice cream! 2. The greatest Mom in the world wouldn't make me kiss my fataunts! 3. She'd always be smiling and keep her opinions to herself. Is anything about your Mom perfect? 1. Her teeth are perfect, but she bought them from the
dentist. 2. Her casserole recipes. But we hate them. 3. Just her children What would it take to make your Mom perfect? 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think somekind of plastic surgery. 2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd dye-it, maybe blue. If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be? 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean.
I'dget rid of that. 2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was mysister who did it and not me. THIS NEEDS TO BE SENT TO ALL MOMS WHO COULD USE A GOOD LAUGHSubject: MOMS
with the moms here.
----- Original Message -----
From:
To:
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 6:48 PM
Subject: Every Mom will relate to this one!
Subject: MOMS The following are different answers given by school-age children
tothe given questions: Why did God make mothers? 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Think about it, it was the best way to get more people. 3. Mostly to clean the house. 4. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3. He made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just usedbigger parts. Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mom? 1. We're related. 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's momslike me. What ingredients are mothers made of? 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and
everythingnice in the world, and one dab of mean. 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then theymostly use string. I think. What kind of little girl was your Mom? 1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff. 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would bepretty bossy. 3. They say she used to be nice. How did your Mom meet your dad? 1. Mom was working in a store and dad was shoplifting. What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him? 1. His last name. 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does heget drunk on beer? Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO todrugs and YES to chores? Why did your Mom marry your dad? 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Momeats a lot. 2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. What makes a real woman? 1. It means you have to be really bossy without looking bossy. Who's the boss at your house? 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dads
sucha goofball. 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuffunder the bed. 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do
thandad. What's the difference between moms and dads? 1. Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got to
workat work. 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. 3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real
powercause that's who you gotta ask if you want to sleep over at yourfriend's. What does your Mom do in her spare time? 1. Mothers don't do spare time. 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. What's the difference between moms and grandmas? 1. About 30 years. 2. You can always count on grandmothers for candy. Sometimesmoms don't even have bread on them! Describe the world's greatest Mom? 1. She would make broccoli taste like ice cream! 2. The greatest Mom in the world wouldn't make me kiss my fataunts! 3. She'd always be smiling and keep her opinions to herself. Is anything about your Mom perfect? 1. Her teeth are perfect, but she bought them from the
dentist. 2. Her casserole recipes. But we hate them. 3. Just her children What would it take to make your Mom perfect? 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think somekind of plastic surgery. 2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd dye-it, maybe blue. If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be? 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean.
I'dget rid of that. 2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was mysister who did it and not me. THIS NEEDS TO BE SENT TO ALL MOMS WHO COULD USE A GOOD LAUGHSubject: MOMS
